Just a little humorous alternative to a scene in Swan Song. It's a one shot.
"So, what happened?" Rory asked. She was still curious how her boyfriend got the black eye. Did he fight someone else? It wasn't as big a deal since it wasn't Dean, but she still didn't like the idea of him getting into a fight no matter whom it was with.
"I don't—"
"Come on, it wasn't Dean, you can say," she begged.
"Will that make you happy?"
"Yes, very."
Jess sighed, there was no way he could win. If he didn't tell her, she'd get upset, and if he did tell her, she'd mock him. "Okay, I'll tell you the truth, since we're both so into the truth tonight. That's what good relationships are about, right?"
"Right."
"But you've gotta promise not to mock me ever, and please don't tell anyone else," he added the last part, knowing she'd tell Lorelai, who'd tell Babette or Miss Patty, and then it would be all over town.
"Promise."
"Not even Lorelai."
She bit her lip, she told her mom everything, and if it was really as embarrassing as Jess was making it about to be then her mom would get a kick out of it.
"Okay?" he asked after she didn't responded.
She debated her options while staring into his coffee brown eyes that she loved so much. Her boyfriend trusted her and she couldn't break the trust, no matter how much fun she and her mother would've had mocking him, "Okay."
He looked down at the ground, "iutackeyayan," he mumbled.
"What?"
He smirked, "I said it once, don't make me repeat it just because you weren't listening."
"You mumbled."
"Not my fault."
"Yes it is! You did the mumbling!"
"Maybe you should get your ears check."
"Jess!" Rory shouted. Jess leaned into her and placed his mouth on her already opened one. She pulled back, "Jess, you're not being fair!" he kissed her again, "Come on—" another kiss, "Just tell me already!" Jess leaned in again, but she pulled away. She crossed her arms, "Hmph!"
Jess, realizing he wasn't going to get anymore warm kisses, walked back into the diner.
She ran into the diner after him and yelled, "Jess, tell me!"
"Tell you what?" Luke asked. He dropped his pencil on the ground shocked by Rory's outburst.
Rory crossed her arms, "How he got the black eye!"
Luke, already knowing what happened, started to laugh.
"Shut up, Luke!" Jess snapped.
Luke collected himself; "He got attacked by a swan."
"Luke!" Jess shouted.
"What?" Rory wanted clarification.
Luke's smile grew wider, "A swam came right after him and, oh, and I'm quoting him by the way, 'beaked' him in the eye."
"Are you serious?" Rory tried not to grin.
"Oh yeah," Luke nodded vigorously, "he even tried to go after it with a ladle for pay back."
Rory looked at Jess. She frown, comforting him by stoking his arm, "Oh, Jesse, I'm so sorry, I yelled—" a huge smile appeared on her face as she lost her inner battle. Giggles escaped. "Sorry," she said between chuckles, "I'm trying to be the nice girlfriend," more laughs came out, "But that's just too funny!" she continued to giggle, "Oh, God, haha, you got beaked! You got beaked!"