Disclaimer: I obviously am not Stephanie Meyer or Taylor Swift, meaning I don't own anything.


He is sensible and so incredible

and all my single friends are jealous

"Look who's here, " Lauren said with a roll of her eyes,

"Looks like the Prince is here to take home his princess," Jessica added with a little animosity in her voice.

"Well, I had a great time guys. Thanks for the dinner." I told them as I got all of my things together. Jessica and Lauren never really acted this way unless Jacob was around. I guess they are a little jealous on how I got myself such a perfect boyfriend like Jake.

"Bella, you promise to come clubbing with us next week right?" Rosalie asked me as she glared at Jessica and Lauren. Alice and her are my two best friends who were never jealous of how Jacob treated me. I mean why would they when they had their very own, extremely model like boyfriends that takes great care of them. Emmett and Jasper were great people and I'm very happy for them.

"I promise I'll make it. I'll see you soon ok girls?" I told them as I got up from my chair. Jacob was waiting by the door for me, and I didn't want to keep him waiting too long.

"Jacob really is a great boyfriend isn't he?" Alice asked me with a knowing smile.

"Yeah he's great." I tell her with a little smile of my own.

"But not as great as Ed-" I gave her a little glare, and she stopped whatever she was about to say.

"I'll see you girls soon. And yes Jacob is great." I told them, as I gave the grinning Alice a little glare.

"Yeah yeah we know. Just go to your boyfriend now." Rosalie said as she waved me off. I smiled at them and headed to Jacob. As soon as he saw me close enough, he gave me a little smile and held my hand as he guided me to his car.

he says everything I need to hear and it's like

I couldn't ask for anything better

he opens up my door and I get into his car

and he says you look beautiful tonight

and I feel perfectly fine

"Here you go my lady," Jacob said with a grin and a dramatic sweep of his hand to the door of his car.

"Why thank you sir." I said with a little curtsy of my own. I smiled at him and sat at the passenger seat. He closed the door for me and headed toward his own side.

"Thank you so much for this Jacob." I told him with a little grateful smile as soon as he started his car. My car broke down recently, and he offered to pick me up from my girls night out. I told him it would be fine if I took a cab home or asked one of my friends, but of course, he offered to take me. He said it would be dangerous for a girl to go home alone at night, and since he said he was free, he said he'd be happy to help.

"It's nothing Bella. I'm just glad I could spend time with you, even if its just to drive you home." I blushed at that. He was always such a gentleman and I still wasn't used to the way he treated me so greatly. I still cant believe that this gentle, charming, handsome, kind, caring person would be my boyfriend.

"You look very beautiful though Bella." He told me as we stopped at a red light. He always seemed to know what to say to make me feel happy, yet embarrassed. I thanked him for the compliment, and we had a comfortable silence throughout the whole ride. I loved how comfortable I was with Jacob. I felt like we were close friends when we just enjoyed each other's company like this.

We finally reached the house and he stopped the car at the driveway. He opened his door, and quickly came to my side to open mine. He helped me out of the car and walked me towards the house.

"Thank you so much for this Jake." I said as I looked through my purse for the keys.

"Your welcome Bella. I'll pick you up tomorrow for our date okay?" He told as he let go of my other hand. He gave me a little hug and started walking back to his car.

"Thank you again Jake!" I screamed to him. He turned back to give me a little smile, which I returned.

I turned the key on the lock and looked back to see if he was gone. He was, but a whole set of memories came rushing to me.

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

and it's 2 am and i'm cursing your name

you're so in love that you act insane

and that's the way I loved you

breakin' down and coming undone

it's a roller coaster kinda rush

and I never knew I could feel that much

and that's the way I loved you

Flashback

"What the hell was that Bella?!? You let him touch you and shit!?! You were even flirting with that bitch!" Edward screamed at me as we approached the stop light.

"Goddammit Edward! How many times do I have to fucking tell you its not like that! You wont even listen to my explaining!" I screamed back at him. I was getting really tired with the way he wont even let me explain what is happening. He just makes up his own stupid conclusions and he doesn't think!

"Not like that?! The fuck! He was touching you and hugging you and you let him! How the fuck is it 'not like that'!" He screams at me again. I swear this person doesn't even listen to me! A friend I haven't seen for a long time, Eric, and u finally see each other and he fucking ruins our little reunion. Of course I would look at a friend, of course I would hug a friend I haven't seen in a long time.

"EDWARD! Listen to me for once! He is my friend! That's it! You're the one I love so stop getting so mad and jealous over him!" I screamed again at him. I really wish he would stop being so jealous all the time and making his own warped up conclusions on things he doesn't know anything about!

"If you loved me then you wouldn't be doing all of that shit with some other guy! Even if his your 'friend'!" Really tired of this, I knew I couldn't keep Eric's secret without a possibility of losing Edward.

"Danmmit Edward! Eric is GAY! Ok? He doesn't like girls! For goodness sakes he even has a boyfriend!" I finally screamed out. Eric doesn't really want this secret of his getting out, but I couldn't hold it knowing that it would be the one that would stop this fighting with Edward.

Everything was silent in the car as he pulled out to my driveway. I was really frustrated with his lack of response, so as soon as he stopped the car, I stepped out to the rain. I heard a car door open as I walked to the front door.

I suddenly felt his arms around me, and I really wasn't in the mood for his little charm. I tried to pull out of his embrace but he tightened his hold on me.

"I'm sorry Bella. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you. You know I love you, and that's why I'm jealous when guys hold you." I heard him whispering in that charming voice of his. He turned me around when he didn't hear any response from me and looked into my eyes.

"I'm sorry Bella. Please forgive me and my stupid acts." He told me with a little pout on his face. I felt my anger slipping as I stared at his pouting face. The way his lips looked glossy with the water on it, the way his hair flattened and darkened up as the water kept dropping down his face. I couldn't take it anymore and reached up to kiss his lips. He knew I couldn't stay mad at him if he looked like that. He kissed me back fully with a little smile on his lips, knowing he was forgiven.

End Flashback

I shook my head to get ride of the little trip to memory lane. I needed to stop these thoughts of him because I was the one who ended everything. I cant regret something I decided to end. With a sigh, I finally stepped through the went and crept quietly to my room, making sure my parents don't wake up.

He respects my space

and never makes me wait

and he calls exactly when he says he will

he's close to my mother

talks business with my father

he's charming and endearing

and I'm comfortable

"So, Jake how's your school going along?" I heard my dad ask Jake. He came on time, but I needed a little more time to get ready for out date. I was about to go to the living room and show myself until I heard what my mom asked him.

"So Jake dear, do I hear any wedding bells in the near future?" I completely stopped at that. I couldn't believe my mom would ask such a question so soon! I mean I know that they liked him, but we have only been together for 3 months! Way too early for anything like that. As I was about to enter, I heard Jacob speak.

"I- um- well, Mrs. Swan, I don't think it's the right time for something like that. I mean I really do love your daughter, but it's too early for things like that. And I don't think Bella is really for something like that. We're both too young for anything like that, but I know that I really do love Bella."

I was speechless after that. So were my parents. I heard my dad clear his throat and tried to start a conversation again.

"I heard that property values are going done these days." I heard my dad state. After that, everyone became animated again. Everyone was talking about how awful the economy is, and I finally got out from the little shock I got from the big question my mom just asked Jake.

I entered the living room and saw Jake look at me. My parents were in a little argument of their own, and Jake stood up to come to me.

"You look absolutely gorgeous." He whispered to me as he held my hands. I saw my parents quite down as they saw us. My mom hand a little smirk on her face, and heard her whisper something to my dad. Something that sounded along the lines of ' Wont be long now.'

I smiled at Jake and we headed to the door, ready to go to our date.

"Bye mom, dad." I waved at them, and my mom still had that little smirk on her face. We went to our date, and as usual, it was a very nice, and comfortable one. The whole time on our date, I kept comparing my date with Edward, and I just wasn't fair for Jacob. So when he dropped me home, I said goodbye to him, and went straight to my room, where more memories of Edward came.

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

and it's 2am and I'm cursing your name

you're so in love that you act insane

and that's the way I loved you

breakin' down and coming undone

it's a roller coaster kinda rush

and I never knew I could feel that much

and that's the way I loved you

Flashback

I saw headlights coming to the driveway and I hurry down the stairs, excited to see Edward again. He wouldn't tell me what we were going to for our date today, but he said to wear something comfortable. Even though I really don't like surprises, I cant wait to spend time with Edward. No matter whatever it is we are doing.

He stops his car in front of me, and I go to the side of the car and opened the door. As I sat down, I saw him checking out what I was wearing and gave me an approving glance.

"You look perfect for what we're about to do Bella." he said while giving me one of his stunning smile. He started the car and drove out of the driveway.

"So now are you going to tell me where we're going?" I pleaded with him. I really couldn't not know where he was taking me.

"Nope, not yet Bella. Don't be too worried. I know you'll love it." He said with a little smile on his face.

"Please tell me? Please" I continued to beg him. He just smiled at me and kept quite. I didn't get any information out of him, so I just stayed sitting down and I pouted. Yes I pouted. That would probably the only way he would give in. I looked at him a little to the side to see if he was giving in, and I just saw him chuckling a little.

"That's not going to work this time Bella. Just humor me and let me do this surprise. Please?" he begged. Ugh I cant say no when he begs with that face.

"Ugh fine I promise I wont force you to tell me anymore. Happy?" I said, finally giving up. He gave me a dazzling smile again, and finally pulled to a parking lot.

I looked up only to see lights and what seemed to be rides. I looked at him and his expression just confirmed what his surprise was.

"We're going to a carnival!?" I asked him excited. I told him I have never been to one and I can not believe he still remembers that! I hurriedly got out of the car and walk to the carnival. I heard him chuckling at me as he followed me to the carnival. I knew this was going to be such a great night.

End Flashback

It was one of the greatest nights of my life even though it started to rain afterwards. Edward was so great that night and we never got into a fight. Well until the end of it anyways. We rode almost all the rides and played in all the booths we could find until the rain poured down. He won me many cute stuffed toys and it was great. Well until we had to go home anyways.

When we were going to his car, one of the stuffed toys I was holding fell down. I picked it up and as I stood up, there was man that whistled and said many inappropriate things to me. Edward immediately got possessive and kissed me in front of all the people. There were even little kids going home but he wouldn't stop. So of course that night, we ended up in a fight. Like always. Like everyday.

he can't see the smile I'm faking

and my heart's not breaking

cause I'm not feeling anything at all

and you were wild and crazy

just so frustrating intoxicating complicated,

got away by some mistake and now

After a couple more days of memories of Edward and I together, I was feeling so lost. Confused. I thought I was finally over him. I thought that I could easily love someone else. I thought giving him up will make my life happier. I though being with Jacob will make me happier that being with Edward.

Was I ever wrong. I don't know why it took me this long to figure it out but I know I made a mistake. A huge mistake in breaking up with him. A huge mistake in being with Jake. I great mistake and thinking Jacob is the one I thought I needed, the one I thought would make me the most happy.

But being with Jacob made me realize that it's Edward that I was most happy with. No matter how great our relation is, my horrible relationship with Edward is what made me happy. All the fights, all the hurt feelings, all of those were buried with all of the good memories and happiness I was feeling with him.

I know I cant be with Jacob. Not right now. Not while I'm still in love with Edward. Not while I still cant forget our memories, Not while, I cant forget him.

"Bella. Beautiful are you listening to me?" I heard Jacob call out to me, which snapped me out of my revelation. We were out clubbing and still all I could think about is Edward and how much I still love him. I stared at Jacob with tears in my eyes, knowing what I had to do. I don't want to hurt this, this fantastic man. But he deserves so much better. Someone who will actually love him. Someone who isn't still in love with someone else.

"Jake… I… I don't think… it's not good…. I mean your great…. But I.." I started out looking at Jake's confused expression.

"Bella, I don't understand. If your not up for clubbing, how about I take you home?" he asked me with a worried expression.

"No Jake, what I' trying to say is-" and I completely stopped as I saw a familiar head of bronze hair. I finally see through the crowed and see his face. His familiar gorgeous face. And now I know how much I missed seeing him. Missed our time together. Missed being with him.

I looked at his face and he looks happy. Extremely happy. And that's when I noticed the gorgeous blonde he was holding. And everything comes crashing down to me.

I was being a selfish bitch. I mean what did I expect, he would wait until I finally realized how much I needed him and want him back? I am such a bitch. A motherfucking asshole. I break up with him, feeling fed up with our relationship, and only now I realize that I still love him?

I turned around from the happy scene with tears falling down my face. how the fuck could I have been so stupid? Not only did I hurt him, but now I have to hurt Jacob too. I need to tell him the truth. I need to tell him everything. And so that's what I did.

I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

it's 2am and I'm cursing your name

I'm so in love that I acted insane

and that's the way I loved you

breaking down and coming undone

it's a roller coaster kinda rush

and I never knew I could feel that much

and that's the way I loved you oh, oh

Flashback

"Edward I really need to talk to you." I told him as I pulled him towards the exit. We were at a club again, and as usual, he was being his possessive self. I have had it with this relationship we had. I have had it with us.

He followed me with a confused look on his face. "Bella hon, what is it? You want to go home now?" He asked me with a soft voice.

That's not what I really need right now. Not what I need to finally break up with him. So without looking at him, I let go of his hand and began the speech I had in my head.

"Edward. You know I love you right? You know that I absolutely care about you aright?" I began.

"What is this all about Bella? What do you-" I hushed him up with a small wave of my hand.

"Edward, I love you so much but I cant take it anymore. I cant take the way you treat me like property. I cant take the way you treat me like I'm your possession. I can't do it anymore Edward. I-I- ne-need to break up with you." and tears finally came. I loved him so much but I can't do it anymore. I deserved to be treated better. Find someone who appreciated me more. I heard silence from him and I turned around.

His look broke my heart. It will forever me in my heart. Tears were falling down his face and he had the most pain expression on his face.

"No. No Bella No. Please no. Don't leave me. Please" he started to plead, trying to reach my hand. I can't do this. It's too painful. But I know I have to. I need my freedom. I need my own life again. I need to be treaded better, be happy. I knew I cant be deterred from what I have to do. I closed my eyes and turned around.

I cant say it or actually go through with what I'm about to do if I stared at his painful expression.

"I'm sorry Edward. But I need this. I need to be happy." I whispered to him as I ran away. I ran away to Alice and Rosalie. I ran away from seeing how it affected him. I ran away from our bumpy relationship. Because I know if I saw the way he fell to his knees, if I saw the pain he was showing, if I saw the tears falling down his face. I know I wouldn't be able to do it. I can't.

End Flashback

and that's the way I loved you oh,

oh never knew I could feel that much

and that's the way I loved you

That was the worst mistake of my life.


Took me pretty long to write this one so please please review. I would love to know that you guys think about this. :)