Insomnia led to this.

Inspired by "Just So You Know" by Jesse McCartney (and maybe a little bit by "It's gonna be me" by Nsync – I've been reliving my childhood).

Set at the start of Season 10.

Another Sandle one-shot- hope you all like it, please review.

Disclaimer: I own zilch.

Never Spoken

Sara stepped into the dingy looking office with a sigh of relief. The team had thrown her a "welcome home party", identifying The Acid Drop wrongly as a suitable place for a quiet gathering. An overwhelming feeling had been following her like a shadow as she had attempted to mingle with all of the people on the other side of the door but their questioning eyes and wary smiles had caused her heart to sink. They were wondering about the state of her marriage- everyone wanted to ask but no one had managed it. The words would form in their minds but never make it to their lips, simply turning into a clouded over glance causing Sara's breath to catch in her chest.

Sara didn't know what it was about her relationship with Grissom but she realised that neither one of them knew how to make it simple- how to just be happy. They had spent so long being apart while together and even now after they had made a display of their commitment to each other they were apart, separated by time zones, land and oceans.

As her eyes swept over her surroundings she took a deep breath her vision lingered at the figure sitting casually on the sofa in the corner of the room. Greg Sanders looked up at her with hazel eyes darkened by an emotion she couldn't place and his lips twisted into a smirk. He stayed silent not taking his eyes off her as he took a mouthful of the firey liquid in his whiskey tumbler. The grey of his suit shimmered in the soft lighting as he moved, his jet black silk tie loosened at the top.

Sara had been finding it hard to adjust to Greg's new style. It felt odd to her having seen go from the crazy almost adolescent lab rat to the grown man he had become. The suits he wore now were fitted, hanging from his shoulders as if there was no other person for them to be worn by, rather than slightly too big suits he'd forced himself to wear before. His whole persona had changed. She had noticed the way that the girls at reception would blush at his attention. She'd always found herself feeling guilty whenever she thought about her colleague's new appearance.

He looked good. There was no denying that. And the way he was looking at her in that moment was something that could make even someone made of ice melt.

"Are you just going to stand there?" he asked in a husky voice that seemed to add to the chemical reactions that had taken a hold of her. As Sara sat herself down next to her friend she had never felt so self aware. She could feel goose bumps rise on her bare arms. He poured another glass and handed her the drink.

"Thank you." she said breathless with an awkward smile as she took the drink from him. His eyes lingered on her lips as she took a sip causing her heart to skip a beat.

"While I was in Peru, I met a guy, a micro-biologist that reminded me so much of you he had the best sense of humour." She began talking hoping that it would reduce the tension that seemed to be weighing heavy on the atmosphere between them. Greg remained silent as he watched her intently while she looked at the corner of the room disappearing into the waves of her memories.

"No one had the guts to ask, but what do I have to loose, where be that husband of yours?" Greg asked, his voice low his eyes focused on Sara's stony expression. She turned to him, her lips pursed.

"He's in Paris, lecturing." she said shortly. Greg gave a humourless laugh and looked at Sara again with a smirk.

"I sense there is trouble in paradise." He muttered just loud enough for her to hear as he poured himself another drink.

Sara didn't respond, taking a sip from her drink while avoiding catching his eye. There was something about the cutting tone of his voice and the way he was leering at her that made Sara doubt Greg's sobriety. He had always been warm towards her and the new dynamic their relationship seemed to be taking on since she had returned scared her slightly.

"I'll take that as a yes, and offer you an alternative..." he let the last half of the sentence linger and turned his whole body to face her. Sara glanced at him wide eyed, frozen in her seat, finding herself unable to react to the way he looked at her.

"I'm joking... calm down..." Greg laughed, his features lighting up in a way that she'd missed. "Want to hide out here? I've got supplies." He indicated to the bottle of whiskey and rum that sat on the table beside him. Sara replied by handing him her empty glass.

"Greg..." she placed her hand on his arm. "I've missed you."

He gave her a beaming smile that reminded her of the youthful, sweet lab tech she had met all of those years ago. They shared drinks and stories while the time flew by. Music continued thumping loudly from the other side of the door but neither one of them cared leaning in to each other to be heard.

Greg moved a strand of hair out of Sara's face as she spoke, his eyes softening as he did so. Sara stopped speaking finally noticing how close they were sitting. Greg's breathing tickled her cheek and she could smell the mix of whiskey, cologne and cigarettes that he wore. As his finger tips brushed her skin she could feel shivers swim down her spine.

"Sara... I still love you." Greg whispered but it was loud enough of Sara to hear. "I shouldn't, but, I do, I can't turn it off. I've tried so hard to let go of you, please believe me I have."

"Greg..." she attempted to stop him before she had to do something- before she found herself having to react to something she had always known.

"Please...Sara...let me finish... Every time I see you I wonder why I waited so long, why I didn't say anything, I've been waiting for you Sara. I've always been here...I love you."

"I'm... married...Greg..." the sentence seemed to slowly slip out of her mouth but she seemed unable to fully commit to the words.

"What do you want me to do Sara? I'll do anything." Neither one of them said anything. Greg had leant even closer his body imposing on Sara's. "Let me prove it...give me a chance Sara..." he whispered.

He placed his shaking lips on hers, ever nerve ending in his body lighting up as he gently kissed her. Without thinking about it Sara kissed Greg back, her arms wrapping around his neck pulling his body flush against hers so he could feel her rapid heartbeat and shaking hands. They were as nervous as teenagers going past the point of no return as they lay tangled together like tree roots exchanging passionate kisses. A heat rose steadily between them but as they slowly undressed they found themselves unable to brush the undeniable guilt aside. But they had decided to leave themselves to the complete mercy of their impulses.

Skin on skin they lay breathlessly in the afterglow Greg held Sara with the bittersweet knowledge that perhaps this would be the only time that he would be able to do so. He gently stroked her hair and let himself immerse in her scent. She rested her head on his chest tracing patterns with her fingertips on his shoulder.

He needed to let go but he couldn't. Greg had spent years attempting to forget what he felt for Sara; attempting to turn his feelings off only to fail.

"I love you." he muttered into her hair pulling her closer, doing the only thing he knew how to; hoping.

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

The End