Tittle: Shame
Pairing: Loki/Tony Stark
Summary: Out of all the things Tony has ever done in bed, this one has never been one. Well, it had, but he had never liked it.
Warning: Crack and Fluff and Tony being lost in his own mind
A/N: Inspired by this prompt: Imagine your OTP lying next to each other in bed, staring at the ceiling, embarrassed and slightly alarmed by the wild, intense, filthy sex they just had.
I did the exact opposite of it.
Shame
Loki was turned away from him, his naked back tense, and Tony wanted to touch him, reassure him everything was fine, everything was going to be fine. But maybe it was better this way. What they had done –
It had been, dare he say it, tender. Tony was used to their usual encounters, of a hot mouth tasting him, of fingers making him sing a litany of filth at the altar of the depraved god, of taking said god in all the ways a mortal shouldn't but he had anyway. Begging his god's cum as only the truly devoted could. And if he was now a devoted man, by said god he was the Bishop of this religion.
And Loki had enjoyed every moment of it, from the escapades they had made when their sex had been new – a blowjob at Tony's office at Stark Industries, with the door wide open so any could enter and the payback as Iron Man took the God of mischief hard against the dirty wall of an alley in Chicago, well in sight of any who dared to look – to the scenes they had got themselves into when they had been comfortable enough with each other's hard-to-cross lines.
But this? This? It had been unthinkable on so many levels! Tony had tasted what tender and loving sex could be like, it had happened once or twice with Pepper, another time with Rhodey (when they had attempted a failed romantic relationship) and another time with Rumiko. It was good enough, but Tony found it boring. Making love (and that word left a rancid taste in his mouth) was boring as fuck! Put your dick in, move slightly, try to make something resembling an emotional connection while being purely physical? Boring.
Tony much preferred having his partner on their knees servicing him, while he whispered filth in their ear.
The Filthy Gospel, delivered by the Bishop, at the flesh altar of the Depraved God.
That had been Tony Stark – still was, actually – but this? This had been sacrilege! Sacrilege of the highest degree, to the point Tony was seriously considering handing in his resignation letter. Maybe it was good that Loki was turned away from him. The way they had behaved had been deplorable!
That boring making love (ew!) stuff? It hadn't been boring, at all. Instead of filth – his face burned in shame just to think it – it had been declarations of sentiment, of adoration, of love and faith and being one.
Fuck he needed a shower. He sat up in bed, appalled at the lack of cum staining his bed sheets, and turned towards Loki just for a moment. His ears were burning red, but the god had his face hidden in his hands, as if he could have just hidden everything they had just done. Tony was disgusted with himself. He found it endearing.
The Monumentally Stupid Fluttering in his stomach was even more horrifying when he found himself smiling sheepishly as the god in his bed just parted his fingers, letting his green eyes look at Tony, as he mumbled something Tony didn't quite catch.
He had to be possessed. He to be! Especially when he leaned over his god, his face burning in shame just as much as Loki's he kissed him, tenderly. Tenderly for fuck's sake! "What was that sweetheart?"
Where had that come from?
"Did we just do what… did we just made love?" Loki said, staring in horrific realization at him. Tony just hid his own face on Loki's shoulder, draping himself over the god as if he was yet another blanket, as if he could just hide their shame. He nodded, slowly, kissing Loki's neck.
What were they even doing?
"Tony –!" Loki said, strangled, even as his neck burnt a deeper shade of red, shame. Utter shame.
"I'm sorry, babe." Tony apologized half-heartedly. He was still kissing Loki's neck, his beard scrapping unmarked skin, as if it could make everything better.
"It's going to happen again, isn't it?" Loki asked, and the worry in his voice, the misery in it and the clench in Tony's chest so much that he just had to look at Loki once more, forehead to forehead.
"I don't know, maybe?" He'd try not to. He would try not to, but –
"I'm so sorry," Loki whispered, closing his eyes, "I can't believe I did this, that we did… I – I liked it." He hissed, in shame.
"Me too," Tony agreed, this was all ridiculous. Ridiculous! Lot of people made love, why not them?
"Oh by the nine," Tony had found out this was Loki's version of 'fuck it! fuck everything' and 'oh god, fuck' it was interchangeable like that. "I admit that it's going to happen," Loki begun, just as appalled as Tony, he could see, "but can we not," he stopped and Tony held his breath, willing Loki to continue and dreading it at the same time. "Can we not do this all the time?" Loki asked and Tony sighed in sheer relief.
"Of course not, darling. Not all the time, or even 50% of the time, I don't think I could take it." He could feel Loki nodding against him in relief. This sort of things just wasn't for everyday fucking, not for them. "Can we just agree that it'll happen when it'll happen, and not overthink it?"
"Yes, let's." Loki agreed quickly, a sigh of relief escaping him, and Tony kissed him, slipping him tongue inside and sucking on the flesh he adored. Oh fuck. He drew back quickly, looking at his god.
"I don't think my ego as the bishop of your altar can take it."
"Your ego as the… what?" Loki half asked half laughed and Tony closed his eyes, a different sort of shame burning him. Right, Loki didn't participate in his mental breakdown and labeling of their sex lives.
"Never you mind," he said quickly, pulling back and flopping besides Loki. He never thought he'd be so well satisfied with this sort of sex. Making love indeed.
"You know," Loki started, turning back to Tony, a glint in his eyes and a smirk across his lips, it was enough to get his cock back to half interested, he knew that look. Usually it proceeded Loki asking him to Submit for him. In the most delicious way, since Loki actually did like being a demanding power bottom, calling all the shots. God indeed, "I need to remove all the traces of… of this making love business," and Tony could hear the same disgusted tone in his voice, it reassured him in ways little else would. "What do you say we head for the shower, you open me up again and show me why, exactly, it's your prayers I listen to the most."
"Prayers?"
"You're not half as quiet as you think you are, my love." Loki smiled, before looking stricken for a moment, again, Tony was disgusted with himself for finding it absolutely endearing. In the next second he was out of the bed and moving to Tony's bathroom, he could hear the bath filling up and the scent of raspberries, one of their favorite scents. "Come on, Iron Man," Loki called, his voice carrying heat so completely different for a moment ago, "I need your cock so far up my arse that I can feel it for days, so sore I won't be able to think of what we did before, I need you to fill me up properly."
Tony blinked to himself, a smile spreading across his lips as he ran after his lover. Seemed as if they hadn't lost their hard earned tittle – pun intended – of most perverted couple!