Breathless (When I Think About Your Lips)
Kara felt her attention drift for the fourth or fifth time since she and Alex had started this episode of Blindspot. She bit her lip as she looked down at Alex, her sister's profile shining in sharp relief in the flickering light of the television. Alex's head was pillowed on one of Kara's thighs, her face tilted at an angle away from the rest of her body as she watched the tv. Alex had grabbed one of Kara's hands when she first laid down and tugged it until their hands tangled loosely together on Alex's stomach. Kara's other hand rested lightly in Alex's hair, occasionally scratching her scalp. Alex made the cutest sigh every time Kara did that.
"Y'know, we can stop watching this."
Kara blinked in surprise. The tv was off and the lamps had brightened. "What?"
Alex was staring up at her now, a slight smile on her face as she released Kara's hand and reached up to cup the side of her face. "Where've you been tonight, stargirl?" she murmured.
Kara felt herself warm at the love and affection shining in Alex's eyes and voice. She ducked her head bashfully, chin sinking into her chest. "I've been thinking," she said lowly.
When she hesitated, Alex used her hand to tilt Kara's head back up. "I could tell," Alex said softly, tucking a stray piece of hair behind Kara's ear. She smiled when Kara looked down at her. "You've been distracted all night."
"Sorry," Kara whispered, her hand clenching involuntarily where it rested on Alex's chest.
A moment later Alex's free hand rested atop Kara's. She gently stroked the back of Kara's hand, fingertips following the ridges and valleys of Kara's knuckles back and forth. "You don't have to apologize, Kar."
They sat in silence for a few minutes, Kara breathing shallowly as Alex looked steadfastly up at her. Her fingers never stopped moving. Kara finally took in a deep breath and let it all out in a rush. "I've been thinking," she said again, "about…" Kara paused and looked up at the ceiling. "About…"
Alex's hand slipped from Kara's cheek around to the nape of her neck. Her thumb rested lightly in the hollow of Kara's throat. "About…" she encouraged, stroking Kara's throat affectionately.
Kara shuddered slightly as she lowered her gaze to meet Alex's. "About kissing you," she whispered.
Alex's hand on Kara's went still for a moment before resuming its stroking motion. "Yeah? You been thinking about this a lot?"
Kara felt her chest and face heat up as she nodded jerkily. "I love you," she said, as if that explained everything. It gave her a rush of joy to see the way those three words could make Alex's whole body vibrate with happiness.
"I love you too," Alex answered, eyes shining. "But Kara," she continued, dropping her hand down to rest on Kara's bicep, "that doesn't mean we have to do anything you don't want to."
"I know, it's just that lately I've…" Kara trailed off, biting her lip as she blinked down at Alex.
"Been thinking about it?"
"Yeah," Kara agreed with a helpless, one-shouldered shrug.
Alex squeezed Kara's arm and sat up, swinging her legs around to plant on the floor and settling back beside Kara, their shoulders brushing. "So tell me about it."
Kara bit the inside of her cheek as she glanced at Alex. "About what?"
"About kissing me." Alex half-turned on the couch, bringing one leg up and tucking it underneath her. One arm stretched along the back of the couch, fingers twisting in blond hair as she faced Kara.
"Oh! I, um, I, I..." Kara stuttered, her breath coming in short bursts.
"Hey, hey," Alex cajoled, resting her hand on Kara's stomach. "Stay with me, Kar. Here," she said, grabbing one of Kara's hands and bringing it to rest on her own stomach, "with me. In for one, two, three, four, out for one, two, three, four. Again, two, three, four, and out, two, three, four."
Kara blinked, her vision clearing as she followed Alex's instructions. After a few more rounds she felt calm enough to let go of where she'd been clenching Alex's shirt. She leaned back, clearing her throat. "I'm okay."
"You sure?" Alex cocked an eyebrow, a slow smirk stealing across her face. "Because just thinking about kissing me made you breathless. I don't know if you can handle the real thing."
Kara groaned and dropped her face into her hands. "Oh Rao."
"I mean," Alex said, leaning back on the couch and gesturing lazily with one hand at her own body, "how are you supposed to be able to resist all of this?"
Kara peeked between her fingers. As Alex's eyes closed in a blink, Kara pounced, pushing Alex flat on the couch and holding herself up on her elbows, letting the rest of her weight settle flush on top of Alex.
Alex huffed out a half-laugh as Kara landed on top of her. She twisted, wrapping her legs around Kara's to flip their position, but Kara just let her weight press more firmly down on the other woman. Alex gave up after a moment, relaxing her legs and dropping her hands to grip Kara's hips, pulling her closer. "Cheater," she murmured affectionately.
Kara licked her lips. Up close like this she could see the tiny flecks of gold in Alex's eyes. "I love you."
The corners of Alex's eyes crinkled. "I love you too." She squeezed Kara's hips lightly. "And I love cuddles, and cheek kisses, and snuggling in bed. I love us, just the way we are. I don't need anything else. This is already more than I ever hoped for. You, Kara, are more than I ever dreamed I deserved."
Kara trembled, dropping her head onto Alex's shoulder. One of Alex's hands rubbed circles on her back as Kara took a few deep, calming breaths. Finally, Kara turned her head to the side, brushing her nose along Alex's cheekbone and nuzzling into her hair. "I love the way you smell," she murmured.
Kara felt a slight tremor wrack Alex's body as she shifted closer. "I've forgotten what the city smelled like when the Oregus flowers were in bloom." She kissed Alex's temple, then let her lips drift across Alex's forehead, giving each eyebrow a gentle press of her lips as she passed by. "Or the scent of my father when he'd just come from his lab and he'd pick me up and spin me around." Kara laid a light kiss on each of Alex's closed eyelids. "Even my mother's perfume has faded away." Kara rested her forehead against Alex's. "But you smell like home," she whispered.
Alex shivered beneath her. "Kar," she breathed tenderly, blinking up at her. Her hand cupped Kara's cheek, wiping away a tear Kara hadn't even noticed.
Kara swallowed. "I wanna kiss you," she murmured.
Alex sighed, letting her hand drift back to cup the back of Kara's neck, scratching it gently.
Kara let her nose brush against Alex's. She tried to lean down, to close that infinitesimally large gap between her lips and Alex's, but she couldn't move, her entire body frozen, so close to its goal. Kara took a deep breath. "I—" her next breath came too quickly, and the next one too.
"Kar. Kara, breathe." This time when Alex tried to move Kara she shifted easily, pushing up on her knees, then falling back against the arm of the couch.
Kara took three gulping breaths, the last one pushed out in a long sigh as she felt her body relax. "I'm sorry," she muttered, staring down at her hands.
"Hey," Alex's voice was soft, as gentle as the hand she rested on Kara's knee. "Kara, hey, look at me. You have nothing to be sorry for, okay?"
Kara sniffed. Alex jiggled Kara's knee until she looked up and met Alex's eyes. "Okay," she murmured. She bit her bottom lip. "I really do wanna kiss you, though," Kara said forlornly.
Alex smiled. "I know. But there's no rush. You'll know when you're ready." She patted Kara's knee and stood up. "Ice cream?"
Kara nodded. She pulled a blanket down onto her lap and squirmed into a more comfortable position as Alex rummaged around in the kitchen. Alex plopped down beside her moments later, holding the ice cream up in the air as Kara spread the blanket over Alex's lap too. Kara took one carton and spoon from Alex. She stared down at the colorful lid. "But what if I'm never ready?"
Alex shrugged easily as she opened her own container. "That's okay too." She nudged Kara's knee with her own until Kara looked up at her. "Besides," Alex said with a wink, "I think ice cream's just as good as kissing."
Kara smiled, and felt her body relax completely. She leaned into Alex's side. "This is better than I ever dreamed too, being here with you like this," she admitted after she'd taken a few bites of her chocolate cherry.
Alex looked at Kara with soft eyes and shook her head. "Sap," she murmured, bopping Kara lightly on the nose with her spoon. "Here," Alex dug out a scoop of cookies and cream and offered it to Kara. "First bite."
Kara set her own carton down on the coffee table and took Alex's offer, humming happily as she wrapped her arms around Alex's waist and laid her head on her shoulder. Kara took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she snuggled into Alex.
This, what they had right here, was better than ice cream or kissing or anything else. This, being with Alex, this was everything.