HI! This is Dovienya Sedai of the Green Ajah and Rhana Sedai of the Yellow Ajah! We decided to amuse you with this little fic that we thought up while going from PE to band (Dovienya) and science (Rhana) in the halls. Thanks to TempleMaster15 for some ideas!!
Disclaimer: We don't own Wheel of Time or the dictionary. Or Sketchers, for that matter.
The Wheel of Time Halloween Party
*Rand (and Lews Therin), Perrin, Mat, Lan, Aviendha, Elayne, Min, Faile, Tuon, Nynaeve, Berelain, Moiraine, Lanfear, Egwene, Liandrin, Elaida, Morgase, Tallanvor, Dovienya, and Rhana are sitting around, idly chatting, when Mat has a really good idea.*
Mat: *grins mischeviously* Hey...... Rhana, Dovienya! Ya know how Halloween is tomorrow?
Dovienya: Yeah... what's your point?
Rhana: I'm not sure I'm following your train of thought, Mat.
Nynaeve: *leans over suddenly* Does he HAVE a train of thought? *walks over to Lan*
Rhana: Good point. Pray continue, Mat.
Mat. O.o; ..... Ooookkk.... Anyway, what if *whispers into Dovienya's ear.*
Dovienya: *nods, nods again, nods again again, etc. An evil grin begins to spread on her face* Rhana, commere! *Whispers Mat's plan into Rhana's ear*
Rhana: ....BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAAAA!
Dovienya: So how do we help?
Mat: Just put everyone into a deep sleep..... You know, with your cool author powers that every author on ffn has?
Rhana and Dovienya: *Snap fingers, and everyone but Mat falls into a veerrry deep sleep. It would have been bad enough with only one author doing so, but two.... Let's just say that won't wake up for a while* By the way, just ask for something and you'll get it, k? Bye! *disappear*
Mat: Nynaeve first.... Scissors, please? *Scissors appear in his hand.* And, nail polish? *Nail polish appears*
Nynaeve: ZzzzzZzzzZzzz
Mat: *clip clip clip clip, singing this little song:* Tuon. Nynaeve gets to be Tuon! Nynaeve, Nynaeve gets to be Tuon! *Paints her nails, very sloppily.* Now, anything else she needs? No more hair, nail polish.... Who next? EGWENE!!
Egwene: *Snores very loudly* HOOOONNNKKK..... Shooooooo..... HOOOOONNNNKKK..... Shoooo.....
Mat: *taps foot, thinking* I KNOW! Give me and a'dam, please? *Snaps a'dam around Egwene's neck, singing:* Damane! Egwene gets to be damane! Egwene, Egwene gets to be damane! Uh, give her a gray dress, wouldya? *Egwene's dress becomes gray like a damane's.* Perfect. Who next? Rand! And... Lews Therin....
Rand: Zzzzzzzz Lews Therin: zZZZZZZZZZ Rand: Zzzzzzzz Lews Therin: zZZZZZZZZ
Mat: Hmm..... *grins, starts singing:* Cadsuane! Rand gets to be Cadsuane! Rand, Rand gets to be Cadsuane! Ter'angreal? *gets Cadsuane's hari ornaments, puts them into Rand's newly made bun* Dress? *Cadsuane's dress appears on Rand.* YAY! Who next? FAILE!
Faile: ..............*snort*...................*snort*.....................
Mat: O.o; MMMk..... Perrin, I pity you. What can Faile be? *Glances at Berelain* Ooooooooo! *Singing* Berelain! Faile gets to be Berelain! FAILE, Faile gets to be Berelain! Uh, just... put her in one of those dresses, wouldya? And same with Berelain, put her in those divided skirt thingys? *They appear in eachother's clothes.* SCOOORE! Who next? MIN!!
Min: *sleeptalking* Raaaand...... mmmffh... Raand? mhhk, mhhff.......
Mat: Suuure... Who does Min get to be? *stops and thinks* What is special about Min.... HER CLOTHES! *begins his song, once again:* LEANE! MIN GETS TO BE LEANE! MIN, MIN GETS TO BE LEANE! Domani clothes? *Min's outfit changes* Peeerfecto! Who next? Perrin!
Perrin: *doesn't make a sound*
Mat: Hmmmmm....... Lessee.... Perrin doesn't like... CHA FAILE! *sings:* Cha Faile, Perrin gets to be from Cha Faile! Perrin, Perrin gets to be from Cha Faile! Give him a fake cadin'sor, please? *Perrin appears in a fake cadin'sor* Gooood! Who next? LAN!
Lan: *sleeptalking* Woorms! I wanna play in the mud and eat worms!
Mat: O.O;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; That... was... scary..... Lan.... Who does Lan get to be? Olver.... heh heh heh.... *singing* Olver! Lan gets to be Olver! Lan, Lan gets to be Olver! Big, fake ears, please? *Big, fake ears appear in Mat's very able hands, then proceed to be put onto Lan.* One of those huge mouth thingys, ya know what I'm talking about? Yes? Apparently so... *One of those plastic mouths appears in Lan's mouth.* And, a hair cut. *Picks up scissors again, cuts Lan's hair.* Better. Who next? MOIRAINE!!
Moiraine: Hhkkk HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE hhhkkk HEHEHEHEHE hhhkkk HEHEHEHEHE!
Mat: That is odd.... OOOk... Moiraine... can be a Graendal! *singing* Graendal! Moiraine can be Graendal! Moiraine, Moiraine can be Graendal! Give her that weird dress, K? *Graendal's dress appears on Moiraine* And her hair has to be blondeish goldish.... *Moiraine's hair color changes drastically* Exceeeelent! Who next? AVIEHDHA!
Aviendha: ....................
Mat: Aviendha.... can be..... *singing, ONCE AGAIN:* Sevanna! Aviendha gets to be Sevanna! Avi, Avi gets to be Sevanna! Um.... the really open dress thingy... and all those necklaces and bracelets... *Aviendha becomea the mirror image of Sevanna, or as close as possible* Who next? ELAYNE!
Elayne: *with her butt in the air* ayaryrnaiohslkjsd.....
Mat: Who should Elayne be? ME! *Begins his warbling:* Me! Elayne has the honor of being me! Elayne, Elayne gets to be MATRIM CAUTHON! [A/N: If we took all the time to tell what Mat does to Elayne, we would spend five years typing it, so just imagine Elayne with a haircut and Mat's clothes and ashandarei, k?] Magnificant! Perfect! I couldn't have done better myself! Who next? ...Lanfear... heh heh heh...
Lanfear: *Drooling* Mommy, I dun wanna go ta school... *makes a nasal sort of sound*
Mat: O.o.. *grins* The Creator.. *singing, if you can call saying words in an off-key warble singing* Creator! Lanfear can be the Creator! Lanfear, Lanfear can be the Creator! Well, *muses* since you can't see the Creator, she can be invisible. and mute. And deaf. Since he doesn't seem able to answer our prayers. (Only in WoT terms) Now where was that never ever ever come off vanishing cream...? *vanishing cream appears in his hands, and he gets quickly to work* There we go. One creator to go! Now, who is my next unfortunate victim? ...Liandrin!
Dovienya: Wash your mouth, you bloody flaming goat-kissing Trolloc! We don't use those words in this house!
Rhana: *dictionary appears in hands* Hypocrite, hypocrite, ah! Here it is! One who affects virtues or qualities he does not have. Next, Liandrin! Now, where would that word be in the dictionary... Found it! Under the /Top Ten Bad Words List/ Oh! Its the first one on there! Lessee... @#%&%^#%$^%*#^^&^%# $%@^!@ $#@^@. *blinks* ok... well then, go on with your fun, Mat!
Mat: @.@ Suuure. Annnyway. Liandrin. Who should Liandrin be?
Mystical Voice From Above: da'tsang!
Mat: YES! *Sings, almost, again* Da'tsang! Liandrin can be a despised one! Liandrin, Liandrin can be da'tsang! Black robe, and hood.... *Liandrin is dressed in rough black wool* Good enough. In fact, I like her like that. Who next? Tuon... Err... Tuon can be nothing. I don't want to make her mad.... Ok, now who? ELAIDA!
Elaida: I WILL CONQUER THE REBELS! I HATE YOU, ALVIARIN!!! YOU ARE *Mat gags her* mmffmghslkhgskjg!
Mat: This is too easy. *Yammers in a slightly singing way* Novice! Elaida gets to be a novice again! Elaida, Elaida gets to be a wilder novice! HAHAHAHAHA!!! Give her a white dress and a tray with breakfast on it. *the dress changes to pure white, and a breakfast tray in her hands* Good, good. Eggy will be happy. Next.... Morgase.... and Tallanvor.
Morgase: Go way, Lini. No want marry young Tallanvor......
Tallanvor: Come here, Lini. Want marry Morgase.......
Mat: Perfect! They get to be married. *singing* Married! Tallanvor and Morgase are married! Tallanvor, Morgase, MARRIED! *chuckles as he slips on their rings* Put them in a bride's dress and groom's suit... Lini will be proud. And a k'sain for Morgase... just because. Right. Who next? No one left. Bummer. Now, I run. Fast.
~~~~~On Halloween morning~~~~~
Everyone who was previously mentioned save Mat, Dovienya, and Rhana: *yaawn*
Lanfear: Hi!
All but Lanfear: AAAH! Who said that? *Look around, see eachother, and scream*
Rand: --aaaa-. Hey, wait. If you all look like that, what do I look like?
Tuon: AND WHAT ABOUT ME?
All but Tuon: O.O HEEEY! How come you don't look different?
Tuon: I don't? Coool!
Everyone else: *Run for mirrors* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Nynaeve: MY HAIR! MY PRECIOUS BRAID! *looks around the room and sees her braid in one piece lying next to the place where she was sleeping.* h..h..how... *faints*
Lanfear: Where am I? WHERE AM I?!?!?!
Rand: WHY ON EARTH DO I HAVE A DRESS ON?
Egwene: *did not make it to mirror* AAAAH!!! NOOO! NOT AGAIN!!!!!
Berelain and Faile: NO! HER?!
Perrin: Uh-oh. HEY! Cha Faile? *growls*
Morgase: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH! WHY UNDER THE LIGHT DID I GET STUCK WITH iHIM/i??!?!?!?!
Tallonvor: I didn't think it was that bad....
*General yammering goes on until Elayne realizes who she is supposed to be*
Elayne: Oh. My. How will I help Andor looking like this... bloody ruffian?
Moiraine: Speaking of Mat... where is he? And why is it that everyone here but Tuon is..... *whatever was goignt o follow the "is" was cut off by the enraged screams of fellow victims*
Dovienya: This won't be fun.
Rhana: Yes it will. Your odd attachment to Mat isn't fair to the characters. *the author brings Mat in, who had been running very fast*
Mat: Uh.... hi! My, don't we look ready for Halloween? Heh... heh... heh...
Narrorater: Just as everyone is about to kill Mat, save Tuon, Aviendha says:
Aviendha: Wait! This toh to us can be repayed with a costume for Mat.
Rand: Who, though?
Perrin: YOU! Mat gets to be you! We can make Mat the Dragon Reborn!
Everyone but Rand: YEAH!!!!!
Rand: Um, no?
Nynaeve: Shut up, Cadsuane. I have always wnated to say that. *channels to hold Mat and Rand still*
~~~~~ an hour later ~~~~~
Narrorater: Mat soon had tattoos like Rand's, hair like Rand's, Sketchers to make him tall enough, and a fake Dragon Sceptor. And, sadly enough, makeup to make him look like a loser.
Rand: I DO NOT LOOK LIKE THAT!!!!
Lews Therin: Actually, that is pretty close to what I looked like.
THE END!
Disclaimer: We don't own Wheel of Time or the dictionary. Or Sketchers, for that matter.
The Wheel of Time Halloween Party
*Rand (and Lews Therin), Perrin, Mat, Lan, Aviendha, Elayne, Min, Faile, Tuon, Nynaeve, Berelain, Moiraine, Lanfear, Egwene, Liandrin, Elaida, Morgase, Tallanvor, Dovienya, and Rhana are sitting around, idly chatting, when Mat has a really good idea.*
Mat: *grins mischeviously* Hey...... Rhana, Dovienya! Ya know how Halloween is tomorrow?
Dovienya: Yeah... what's your point?
Rhana: I'm not sure I'm following your train of thought, Mat.
Nynaeve: *leans over suddenly* Does he HAVE a train of thought? *walks over to Lan*
Rhana: Good point. Pray continue, Mat.
Mat. O.o; ..... Ooookkk.... Anyway, what if *whispers into Dovienya's ear.*
Dovienya: *nods, nods again, nods again again, etc. An evil grin begins to spread on her face* Rhana, commere! *Whispers Mat's plan into Rhana's ear*
Rhana: ....BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAAAA!
Dovienya: So how do we help?
Mat: Just put everyone into a deep sleep..... You know, with your cool author powers that every author on ffn has?
Rhana and Dovienya: *Snap fingers, and everyone but Mat falls into a veerrry deep sleep. It would have been bad enough with only one author doing so, but two.... Let's just say that won't wake up for a while* By the way, just ask for something and you'll get it, k? Bye! *disappear*
Mat: Nynaeve first.... Scissors, please? *Scissors appear in his hand.* And, nail polish? *Nail polish appears*
Nynaeve: ZzzzzZzzzZzzz
Mat: *clip clip clip clip, singing this little song:* Tuon. Nynaeve gets to be Tuon! Nynaeve, Nynaeve gets to be Tuon! *Paints her nails, very sloppily.* Now, anything else she needs? No more hair, nail polish.... Who next? EGWENE!!
Egwene: *Snores very loudly* HOOOONNNKKK..... Shooooooo..... HOOOOONNNNKKK..... Shoooo.....
Mat: *taps foot, thinking* I KNOW! Give me and a'dam, please? *Snaps a'dam around Egwene's neck, singing:* Damane! Egwene gets to be damane! Egwene, Egwene gets to be damane! Uh, give her a gray dress, wouldya? *Egwene's dress becomes gray like a damane's.* Perfect. Who next? Rand! And... Lews Therin....
Rand: Zzzzzzzz Lews Therin: zZZZZZZZZZ Rand: Zzzzzzzz Lews Therin: zZZZZZZZZ
Mat: Hmm..... *grins, starts singing:* Cadsuane! Rand gets to be Cadsuane! Rand, Rand gets to be Cadsuane! Ter'angreal? *gets Cadsuane's hari ornaments, puts them into Rand's newly made bun* Dress? *Cadsuane's dress appears on Rand.* YAY! Who next? FAILE!
Faile: ..............*snort*...................*snort*.....................
Mat: O.o; MMMk..... Perrin, I pity you. What can Faile be? *Glances at Berelain* Ooooooooo! *Singing* Berelain! Faile gets to be Berelain! FAILE, Faile gets to be Berelain! Uh, just... put her in one of those dresses, wouldya? And same with Berelain, put her in those divided skirt thingys? *They appear in eachother's clothes.* SCOOORE! Who next? MIN!!
Min: *sleeptalking* Raaaand...... mmmffh... Raand? mhhk, mhhff.......
Mat: Suuure... Who does Min get to be? *stops and thinks* What is special about Min.... HER CLOTHES! *begins his song, once again:* LEANE! MIN GETS TO BE LEANE! MIN, MIN GETS TO BE LEANE! Domani clothes? *Min's outfit changes* Peeerfecto! Who next? Perrin!
Perrin: *doesn't make a sound*
Mat: Hmmmmm....... Lessee.... Perrin doesn't like... CHA FAILE! *sings:* Cha Faile, Perrin gets to be from Cha Faile! Perrin, Perrin gets to be from Cha Faile! Give him a fake cadin'sor, please? *Perrin appears in a fake cadin'sor* Gooood! Who next? LAN!
Lan: *sleeptalking* Woorms! I wanna play in the mud and eat worms!
Mat: O.O;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; That... was... scary..... Lan.... Who does Lan get to be? Olver.... heh heh heh.... *singing* Olver! Lan gets to be Olver! Lan, Lan gets to be Olver! Big, fake ears, please? *Big, fake ears appear in Mat's very able hands, then proceed to be put onto Lan.* One of those huge mouth thingys, ya know what I'm talking about? Yes? Apparently so... *One of those plastic mouths appears in Lan's mouth.* And, a hair cut. *Picks up scissors again, cuts Lan's hair.* Better. Who next? MOIRAINE!!
Moiraine: Hhkkk HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE hhhkkk HEHEHEHEHE hhhkkk HEHEHEHEHE!
Mat: That is odd.... OOOk... Moiraine... can be a Graendal! *singing* Graendal! Moiraine can be Graendal! Moiraine, Moiraine can be Graendal! Give her that weird dress, K? *Graendal's dress appears on Moiraine* And her hair has to be blondeish goldish.... *Moiraine's hair color changes drastically* Exceeeelent! Who next? AVIEHDHA!
Aviendha: ....................
Mat: Aviendha.... can be..... *singing, ONCE AGAIN:* Sevanna! Aviendha gets to be Sevanna! Avi, Avi gets to be Sevanna! Um.... the really open dress thingy... and all those necklaces and bracelets... *Aviendha becomea the mirror image of Sevanna, or as close as possible* Who next? ELAYNE!
Elayne: *with her butt in the air* ayaryrnaiohslkjsd.....
Mat: Who should Elayne be? ME! *Begins his warbling:* Me! Elayne has the honor of being me! Elayne, Elayne gets to be MATRIM CAUTHON! [A/N: If we took all the time to tell what Mat does to Elayne, we would spend five years typing it, so just imagine Elayne with a haircut and Mat's clothes and ashandarei, k?] Magnificant! Perfect! I couldn't have done better myself! Who next? ...Lanfear... heh heh heh...
Lanfear: *Drooling* Mommy, I dun wanna go ta school... *makes a nasal sort of sound*
Mat: O.o.. *grins* The Creator.. *singing, if you can call saying words in an off-key warble singing* Creator! Lanfear can be the Creator! Lanfear, Lanfear can be the Creator! Well, *muses* since you can't see the Creator, she can be invisible. and mute. And deaf. Since he doesn't seem able to answer our prayers. (Only in WoT terms) Now where was that never ever ever come off vanishing cream...? *vanishing cream appears in his hands, and he gets quickly to work* There we go. One creator to go! Now, who is my next unfortunate victim? ...Liandrin!
Dovienya: Wash your mouth, you bloody flaming goat-kissing Trolloc! We don't use those words in this house!
Rhana: *dictionary appears in hands* Hypocrite, hypocrite, ah! Here it is! One who affects virtues or qualities he does not have. Next, Liandrin! Now, where would that word be in the dictionary... Found it! Under the /Top Ten Bad Words List/ Oh! Its the first one on there! Lessee... @#%&%^#%$^%*#^^&^%# $%@^!@ $#@^@. *blinks* ok... well then, go on with your fun, Mat!
Mat: @.@ Suuure. Annnyway. Liandrin. Who should Liandrin be?
Mystical Voice From Above: da'tsang!
Mat: YES! *Sings, almost, again* Da'tsang! Liandrin can be a despised one! Liandrin, Liandrin can be da'tsang! Black robe, and hood.... *Liandrin is dressed in rough black wool* Good enough. In fact, I like her like that. Who next? Tuon... Err... Tuon can be nothing. I don't want to make her mad.... Ok, now who? ELAIDA!
Elaida: I WILL CONQUER THE REBELS! I HATE YOU, ALVIARIN!!! YOU ARE *Mat gags her* mmffmghslkhgskjg!
Mat: This is too easy. *Yammers in a slightly singing way* Novice! Elaida gets to be a novice again! Elaida, Elaida gets to be a wilder novice! HAHAHAHAHA!!! Give her a white dress and a tray with breakfast on it. *the dress changes to pure white, and a breakfast tray in her hands* Good, good. Eggy will be happy. Next.... Morgase.... and Tallanvor.
Morgase: Go way, Lini. No want marry young Tallanvor......
Tallanvor: Come here, Lini. Want marry Morgase.......
Mat: Perfect! They get to be married. *singing* Married! Tallanvor and Morgase are married! Tallanvor, Morgase, MARRIED! *chuckles as he slips on their rings* Put them in a bride's dress and groom's suit... Lini will be proud. And a k'sain for Morgase... just because. Right. Who next? No one left. Bummer. Now, I run. Fast.
~~~~~On Halloween morning~~~~~
Everyone who was previously mentioned save Mat, Dovienya, and Rhana: *yaawn*
Lanfear: Hi!
All but Lanfear: AAAH! Who said that? *Look around, see eachother, and scream*
Rand: --aaaa-. Hey, wait. If you all look like that, what do I look like?
Tuon: AND WHAT ABOUT ME?
All but Tuon: O.O HEEEY! How come you don't look different?
Tuon: I don't? Coool!
Everyone else: *Run for mirrors* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Nynaeve: MY HAIR! MY PRECIOUS BRAID! *looks around the room and sees her braid in one piece lying next to the place where she was sleeping.* h..h..how... *faints*
Lanfear: Where am I? WHERE AM I?!?!?!
Rand: WHY ON EARTH DO I HAVE A DRESS ON?
Egwene: *did not make it to mirror* AAAAH!!! NOOO! NOT AGAIN!!!!!
Berelain and Faile: NO! HER?!
Perrin: Uh-oh. HEY! Cha Faile? *growls*
Morgase: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH! WHY UNDER THE LIGHT DID I GET STUCK WITH iHIM/i??!?!?!?!
Tallonvor: I didn't think it was that bad....
*General yammering goes on until Elayne realizes who she is supposed to be*
Elayne: Oh. My. How will I help Andor looking like this... bloody ruffian?
Moiraine: Speaking of Mat... where is he? And why is it that everyone here but Tuon is..... *whatever was goignt o follow the "is" was cut off by the enraged screams of fellow victims*
Dovienya: This won't be fun.
Rhana: Yes it will. Your odd attachment to Mat isn't fair to the characters. *the author brings Mat in, who had been running very fast*
Mat: Uh.... hi! My, don't we look ready for Halloween? Heh... heh... heh...
Narrorater: Just as everyone is about to kill Mat, save Tuon, Aviendha says:
Aviendha: Wait! This toh to us can be repayed with a costume for Mat.
Rand: Who, though?
Perrin: YOU! Mat gets to be you! We can make Mat the Dragon Reborn!
Everyone but Rand: YEAH!!!!!
Rand: Um, no?
Nynaeve: Shut up, Cadsuane. I have always wnated to say that. *channels to hold Mat and Rand still*
~~~~~ an hour later ~~~~~
Narrorater: Mat soon had tattoos like Rand's, hair like Rand's, Sketchers to make him tall enough, and a fake Dragon Sceptor. And, sadly enough, makeup to make him look like a loser.
Rand: I DO NOT LOOK LIKE THAT!!!!
Lews Therin: Actually, that is pretty close to what I looked like.
THE END!