Me: This is something I was always interested in.

Reborn: Tsuna being painfully disemboweled by the Varia?

Tsuna: HIEEE! That's not funny, Reborn!

Reborn: Only to you.

Me: Why is it always you two that show up? Why can't I get anyone else?

Reborn: ~aims gun at my head~ I would hope you're not ungrateful for me wasting my precious time to grace you with my presence.

Tsuna: ~mutters~ Arrogant baby. ~dodges bullet~ REBORN!

Reborn: You've been getting far too mouthy. Let's correct that.

Me: Anyways, I've decided to write about my kindred spirits, Squalo and Tsuna. Hopefully, you'll feel as close to them as I do. ~knocked out by explosion~

Disclaimer... I don't own Katekyo Hitman Reborn! If I did, Shamal would still be with us. ~sniffle~

How it began

Tsuna groaned as he woke up. He felt like he'd been whacked over the head by a ten ton mallet.

He blinked. Oh wait... he had. The brunette had walked into his room after school and the next thing he knew–WHAM! He was down. He hadn't even seen it coming.

Well, at least someone had put him in a chair instead of leaving him on the floor. The last thing he needed was the kids stomping over his body again. He still had bruises from tha... Wait a second.

"HIEEE! WHY AM I ON A PLANE?"

Back in Namimori, a woman currently hanging laundry looked up at the sky. "Ara? That sounded like Tsu-kun." She giggled. "But that's impossible. He's on vacation with Reborn-kun. Uwah, Tsu-kun is so lucky!" she squealed.

Meanwhile, our favorite brunette was getting silenced by a very strong kick to the head. Tsuna's head banged against the wall of the plane, and he whined as he held his head.

"Be quiet, Dame-Tsuna. I'm trying to take a nap."

The boy nearly shrieked when he heard the voice of his tutor. He turned to look at where the fedora-wearing baby was and gaped.

There was a seat next to his. This was no ordinary seat. No, this seat's upholstery was a deep crimson red, and it was obviously more cushiony than a Temperpedic pillow. There was the remains of what was surely a five-course meal surrounding it, and a waiter ('Why on earth is there a waiter on a plane?') was in the process of placing an espresso on a separate tray. And there seemed to be a kind of glow coming from the chair, probably due to the fact that the rest of the chair that wasn't cushiony heaven was more than likely solid gold.

The student struggled to ask the obvious question. "Reborn, why do you have a freaking throne for a plane seat?" he asked, trying to pick his jaw off the floor.

"'Cause it's the only acceptable seating a hitman of my caliber should have. I thought that was obvious."

There wasn't really any response to that. Not anything that wouldn't get him tossed out of the plane, anyway.

Tsuna sighed in relief when he finally saw the mansion after being driven through this bizarrely familiar forest for a good half hour. He couldn't wait to put his and Reborn's luggage down–like his Spartan tutor would actually carry his own bags–and collapse on a bed to try and sleep through this entire ordeal.

The trip had been nothing but misery since he'd woken up. Once he'd gotten over the fact that he was probably well on his way out of the country during the school year (Oh God, Hibari-san was going to kill him!) with only Reborn for company, he'd decided to get something to eat. Or at least, tried to. It was just his luck that none of the flight attendants, or inexplicable waiters, spoke Japanese* and Reborn was too much of a jerk to translate for the boy. He'd had to make do with the left-overs from the currently napping baby's meal.

And don't even get him started on airports. He and Reborn had been in baggage claim, making sure they got everything, when an obnoxious couple, the male wearing a cow-print shirt and the woman a matching skirt, had grabbed one suitcase that Tsuna knew for a fact belonged to Reborn. It took nearly ten minutes to get back the luggage that Tsuna suspected held very much illegal weapons, saying that yes, this did belong to them, no, it does not say Mucca on the tag, yes, he was sure; all while trying to pacify his increasingly agitated tutor, whom the lady would not stop gushing about how cute and adorable he was and how she could just eat him up.

Security was practically painless compared to some of the other things, barring the urge to tear his hair out at the apparently universal insanity everyone shared. You would think a toddler removing several pounds of deadly weaponry from his Armani suit-clad person would raise a few eyebrows. But no, the extendable dagger and set of throwing knives only got an impressed remark on the realistic quality of Japanese toy weapons; the two dozen small firearms being casually dismantled as they were laid in the box had the professor behind them asking where to find such cleverly designed puzzle pieces; and the opened case holding a just polished, positively gleaming sniper rifle? All the security guy at the X-ray machine said was that it was amazing that someone so young could be responsible enough to keep his expensive toys in such sleek condition.

If Tsuna didn't know better, he'd have sworn these people were related to Yamamoto.

At least he knew he was in Italy. He may not be able to speak Italian to save his life, but he knew enough to know that that was what everyone was speaking. So, it didn't really surprise him when a dark car with two men in dark suits were waiting for them outside. It figured that Reborn would drag him all the way to the other side of the world just to see Vongola Headquarters.

Beside him, Reborn frowned. He turned to the men in the front seats. "Why are we here? We're supposed to meet the Ninth at the Mansion."

His student looked at him in confusion. "What do you mean, Reborn? Isn't that the mansion right there?"

"No, Dame-Tsuna," he said with furrowed eyebrows. "The Vongola Mansion, despite it's name, is more like a castle. What's more, it's twice the size of this place, with a beautiful lake near it. Do you see a lake?"

Tsuna looked back out the window, looking (hoping) to see a lake somewhere. No such luck. All there seemed to be were some rather tall hedges quickly disappearing behind the building as the car drew closer.

"So where are we?" he whined, trying not to panic. He'd already had misgivings about this trip, and the fact that they were not where they were supposed to be–they weren't where Reborn wanted them to be–increased his anxiety. Things did not not go according to Reborn's plans. They just didn't. He waited for his tutor's reply as the car was put in park, and the men got out.

But Tsuna got his reply before the hitman could even speak.

CRASH! A body was thrown through one of the elegant windows near the side of the building, gravel flying as the large man skid across the driveway.

Opening the door, he and Reborn leaned their heads out to look. His breath seized up when he saw who was lying there: a large man with a strangely spiked beard and hair (Not that he had any right to judge.), large lips, and piercings all over his face. Tsuna closed his eyes and prayed he was seeing things. 'This isn't real, this isn't real, this isn't-'

"Shishi, looks like Levi's taking a dirt nap. Guess the prince was too much for him," came a horribly familiar voice from the shattered window.

It took everything in Tsuna not to shriek and run away. By now, it was clear where they were. And dang it, he wanted get as far away as possible.

"Tsuna, get behind the wheel. We need to leave before they notice us. I don't care if you don't know how to drive, we are not staying here," muttered Reborn. Apparently, Tsuna wasn't the only one that didn't appreciate the thought of being here. The boy started to crawl towards the front seat.

Alas, that was as far as he was going to get.

"VOI! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU GUYS WANT?" someone very familiar and very loud shouted. He whipped his head around to see a long-haired man baring down on his and Reborn's escorts. Okay, so they hadn't been seen yet. Tsuna inched himself closer. They still had a chance to escape.

"We've brought the Arcobaleno, Reborn, and the tenth Vongola candidate, Sawada Tsunayoshi." Or maybe Lady Luck just liked getting his hopes up before sending them crashing down in a ball of flames. She'd always hated him.

The next thing he knew, the doors to the car had been sliced off. 'Hie! Just what is his sword made of?' And now, he had five pairs of eyes (At least, he thought there were five. You could only actually see Squalo and Levi's.) staring at him and his tutor, each with different emotions. None of which looked particularly benevolent.

"Just what," Squalo gritted out, "are you doing here?"

Reborn wasn't having any of the intimidation. He had a reputation to keep. "That's my question. We're supposed to be at the Vongola Mansion right now." He cocked his gun at all five assassins that were getting way too close to his personal space. "What have you blood-thirsty idiots done this time?"

At the look of confusion and wariness that crossed all of their faces, Tsuna felt his soul leave him. 'They don't know. Not them, not Reborn, not anybody.' Just who was pulling the strings here?

"...and so, you see, I had to take the opportunity to start rebuilding my relationship with my son and show the Mafia world that the Vongola is still united. What with the incident at the Inheritance Ceremony and Xanxus's recent encounter, I've come to realize time is even shorter than I had previously thought." The old man smiled genially at them all as they stared. "I'm glad that you are all so understanding and are willing to deal with each other for the time being."

Before he could cut the transmission, Reborn cut in quickly, "I trust flight arrangements have already been made." At the silence that greeted that, the hitman pressed on, "For our return to Japan. Since we're clearly not going to be doing as planned, there's no reason for me and Tsuna to stay in Italy."

The Ninth's face took on a weary look. "Unfortunately, that won't be possible. We didn't get to interrogate Xanxus's stalker about his affiliation, so we have no idea who's plotting against the Vongola at this time. And we don't know how they'd react to Tsunayoshi and you being here. It's safer for both of you to lay low while we investigate. I trust you all will get along splendidly." No one commented on how even Nono didn't look like he believed that last bit.

Everyone was quiet for a moment as they absorbed what Timoteo had told them. For the Varia, this was simply that their boss was basically going to be in protective custody whilst they were expected to tolerate having their boss's most hated rival and that damn tutor of his.

For Reborn and Tsuna, however, there was a whole heck of a lot more to absorb. Apparently, someone had been stalking Xanxus, and the second he was without any kind of guard, the man had approached, saying something about him being absolutely perfect and that it was true what they said about him being the true heir of the Vongola. That had been all; it seems that the second the words 'true heir' left his mouth, Xanxus had vaporized him.

Not only this, but it seems that when word had reached Timoteo about his adopted son being stalked, he'd asked (coughkidnappedcough) Xanxus to come to the Mansion while they looked into it. From the looks the Varia had given each other as they heard bunch of screaming, blasts, and curses roared in a rough, rage-filled voice, it had been clear that Xanxus still wasn't taking it well, two days after the fact.

And now, Reborn and Tsuna had to take in the reality that they were stuck with the Varia for an indefinite amount of time, something for which they had received no warning and therefore, no chance to prepare or bolt.

Levi was the first to start protesting. "I refuse to let this usurper stay in the boss's home. It's betrayal." For good measure, he glared hatefully at a timid Tsuna.

"Well, it's not like we can go against Nono's orders," reasoned Lussuria. "We'll just have to put up with it for now. We'll just keep them from the boss's wing."

"The prince will not tolerate commoners near his rooms. They should be near the less worthy–like one of you," groused Bel, pointing a finger at the rest of the Varia.

Mammon response was to take the "prince's" crown and melt it. When Bel broke out of his shock to realize it had been an illusion, he scowled and threw several knives at the infant. The illusionist disappeared, the knives sailing straight at a quiet Squalo whom managed to duck in time.

"VOI! YOU LITTLE SHIT, I'LL KILL YOU!"

It quickly became an all-out brawl, with Lussuria scolding them as they broke furniture and stained the carpet with blood. "Oh, how am I ever going to get out the stains!"

Reborn just pointed to a hallway from his place on Tsuna's head, and made the brunet grab their luggage as they made their way to the first available room that suited the hitman's tastes.

Tsuna didn't even bother unpacking. He just got in the bed, pulled the covers over his head, and prayed that this would all be a dream as he fell straight to sleep, smiling unknowingly when he felt a familiar weight rest against him and let out a sigh.

Oh well, at least he still had Reborn with him.

Me: Well, that worked out better than I planned.

Reborn: You were really wordy. It was annoying. ~aims gun at me~

Tsuna: Reborn, leave her alone! The readers are supposed to be criticizing her, she doesn't need you!

Reborn: ~kicks Tsuna in the head~ Hmph, you're a thousand years too early to be telling me what to do, Dame-Tsuna.

Me: ~hands Tsuna a bag of ice and turns to readers~ Look, I want honest opinions. I need to know if this seems interesting, or if I should go in another direction. And if you could tell me how my characterization was, that'd be great. I want to improve, and you guys help me do that.

Reborn: Of course, that's the only thing they're good for.

Tsuna: REBORN!

Me: ~sighs~ Please, if you could just take a little time to tell me how I did, I'd appreciate it.

Tsuna: Thanks for reading! ~waves~

Reborn: Ciao ciao!