Nasty
Unexpected Wimpy Kid
Composed by: Koffeeholic
Koffeeholic's Word:
Let's just skip to the short…
Monday, November 7
I'm spending the night at Fregley's to get back at Rowley. I hope it works but I can't seem to deal with Fregley's grossness. I CAN'T ANYMORE! He nearly dropped his retainer in my milk!
Then Fregley comes from the bathroom with his hands hiding behind his back suspiciously.
"Hey, Greg. Wanna play 'guess what's behind my back?'" he asks.
"Uh, sure…a disembodied freckle?"
"Close!" He slowly unveils what the mystery object was. "It's a fresh booger—a moist and brown one! You can have half of it if you want!"
I could faint from seeing that THING at the tip of his finger. But I run to the end of the hall with my journal with hopes of getting into the guest bathroom. Sadly, I discover it was occupied as I rapidly twist and turn the doorknob.
"Wait, Greg! I can break off some for you!"
I want to scream higher than Dorothy's voice wanting to escape. I lay paralyzed in the back from rug burn. Then comes a horrible something. Fregley puts the brownish glob between his teeth before tripping over a patch of carpet; he falls directly over me. Out comes my screaming.
"AAAAAAAA—
Lips that have been in nearly every unclean place you can think of silenced me. And a surprise landed on my tongue too—the booger.
Fregley gets off me and says, "Wow, you're a great kisser!"
And I think I'm going to be sick! Uh-oh! I think I'm right. A brown tidal wave of puke soaked my pajamas and Fregley scooped some up, squishing his fingers around in it.
"This is the best sleep over ever!" he cried as he smeared a little over his cheek.
And I puke again.