I don't own anyone from Rookie Blue, although I do wish I could own Sam… Hope you guys enjoy...
It's been a few weeks since Kate was shot at the free concert at the Supernova and I still felt horrible. I couldn't seem to get over the fact that we were just talking and out of nowhere she was shot. Yes, I was shot, but I was the one who got to live. I never told anyone in the division, but I wish it had been me that was killed and let her live her life.
After that day I wondered what have I done with my life. Am I capable of being a great cop? I'm not too sure anymore...
Over the past few weeks I have separated myself from everyone and hang around the house. Of course everyone is worried about me, but I can't seem to get over the fact that someone got shot. I even shut Luke out of my life, but lately it doesn't seem like he cares too much. He calls me when he feels like he has enough time and Sam is constantly trying to make me talk to him but there isn't much I can do. I guess everyone is right about me. When things get rough I just take off and start running. I've done that in every situation that I think that I can't handle on my own.
Finally, when I think everything is going my way, it changes. I always seem to be getting myself in trouble. Every shift I work I am usually on patrol with Sam, and I never say anything to him about anything.
What am I doing with myself? I am pushing everyone away and sooner or later I am going to have to get over things. I just don't get why it was her that was killed that day. If I wouldn't have let her in she would probably still be alive…
I hold myself responsible for her being killed that day... I don't think I can ever get over it.
Working on the next chapter for this as we speak… Hope you guys like it… Don't forget to review.