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"Poison"
A Snips and Spirals Fanfic
Text by Lady Tesser
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DISCLAIMER: I'm not using a stereotype. I knew an Irishwoman like Kells - minus being a witch, she was exactly like this. I do hope she found her own way out of the darkness. Dedicated to Kathy, wherever she may be.
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"How's Kells?" Britomartis Vox asked as she came back into the dorm she shared with her four roommates.
Peony Danderfluff shook her head. "I think she's passed out again."
"Third time this week," Oriana Crescent said quietly.
Akiko Mori rolled her dark eyes. "We know what O'Shanahan does in her spare time."
"Yeah, but three times a week is not good," Martis pointed out as she sat on the Irish girl's bed, smoothing red hair from the girl's forehead. "It's really interfering with school and exams are coming up in a month."
"We can't wake her up," Oriana returned. "She's going to miss History of Magic class and you know what Binns will do."
Akiko crawled on the bed and pulled Bridget O'Shanahan's limp body up. "God, she weighs a ton!"
Martis helped her. "Well, she's a Celtic warrior and you're a little Japanese gal, what do you expect?" She patted Bridget's cheeks. "Come on, Kells, wake up. We're supposed to be in the Great Hall by now."
The redhead did not respond, only swayed with the other girls' movements of her.
"Oh, crud," Peony sighed, wringing her hands. "This is not good; this is not good at all."
Oriana spun on her, shoving the small blonde girl against a bedpost. "You tell Price, and I'll cut off your hair and sell it to a wig-maker!"
"Shut up, Crescent!" Martis snapped. "It's no secret that Kells drinks! Nurse Pomfrey's been putting her through detox every time she goes into the hospital! Something like this is going to get her expelled for sure!" She picked Bridget up, looping the unconscious girl's arm around her neck and headed for the door. "I'm taking her into the showers to wake her up - Akiko, get her uniform out."
Oriana stood up. "Who died and made you leader of the pack?"
Martis placed Bridget in a chair and glared at the girl. "Listen, Crescent, I don't see you doing anything constructive. Now, either help me wake her up or stay out of the way."
"This is unacceptable behavior - "
"Shut it, Prefect-wannabe!" Martis tossed Medusa at Oriana; the snake obliged by hissing menacingly as she darted her predominate fangs around in front of the girl's terrified face.
Martis briefly wondered how Medusa got fangs, since constrictor snakes don't need them. Putting it out of her mind, she picked up Bridget again and took her to the showers.
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Severus Snape looked toward the entrance of the Great Hall again, craning his neck to see who was coming through. Any girl with long blonde hair was checked to see if she wore sunglasses, which none of them did. He knew he should not have pushed her so hard in studying for the finals, but he wanted to make sure she was going to return to Hogwarts' next year and not have any obstacles for Quidditch tryouts.
He absently stirred his oatmeal as he leaned on his fist.
A blonde person sat before him. "Where is your little friend, Snips?" Lucius Malfoy asked. "Did you break up after the suspension of the Marauders because there was nothing else to do together?"
Sev glared at him. "We were cramming last night - she's recovering now."
Lucius' eyes bugged, making him drop his fork, which was halfway to his mouth. Over-easy egg smeared over the front of his robe.
Several people within earshot began chattering up the Rumor Mill which spun out of control and began shooting off in all directions, embedding into the oak paneling of the Great Hall and threatening to crack the windows.
Sev, too worried about Martis being gone from breakfast, did not notice what was going on around him.
"They did what with each other?"
"She's preggers with his spawn!"
"They were caught practicing with a copy of the Wizard's Kama Sutra!"
"She dumped him and ran off with her snake!" "She caught him in the arms of Sirius Black and she's crying in the bathroom!"
"He sold her to Lucius Malfoy for three magic beans!"
"He killed her and buried her in the garden!"
Professor Penderdandis, knowing exactly what was being said, quietly intimated, "Silence."
Most of the Great Hall fell silent. He stared at the assemblage of students looking expectantly at him and young Mister Snape who was distracted with his own worries. "It's not nice to start rumors."
Dumbledore raised an eyebrow, and then gave a nod of approval. The rest of the Hall went back to normal while Lucius quietly cussed out Sev who still had no idea what was going on around him, especially concerning the revelation that he had been in the middle of a torrid affair involving his best friend, half the Marauders, the snake, and three magic beans.
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Bridget swore in Celtic as Martis dragged her back up to their dorm room, dressed her, and frog-marched her with Akiko down to the Great Hall near the end of breakfast.
"Oh, Great Bellows of Brigid," she moaned, holding her hand to her head. "As soon as I can see without the light stabbing my eyes, I'm going to kill you, Spirals."
"Take a number, Kells," she retorted, slipping the bigger girl on a bench. "Hey, Snips, sorry to keep you waiting."
Sev leaned across the table and touched her hair. "You're wet!"
"Had to give Kells a shower." She looked around and pushed a plate of toast toward the Irish girl. Looking around, she poked her head under the table and knocked her knuckles against the floor. "Hey, if any of you can hear me down there, can you send some coffee up to Slytherin?"
It was worth a shot, just to find out if it could be done. Which it did not. Martis sighed and poured orange juice for Bridget. "What happened this morning, Snips? People have been giving me looks of pity."
"I have no idea," he answered. He glanced at Bridget. "Hangover?"
"Affirmative," Akiko added as she attacked her chopped boiled egg and kippers. "Poteen Queen can't lay off the stuff."
Sev sat quietly, then murmured, "I wonder if I can ... make a potion that could get rid of hangovers."
Bridget looked up at him, also wearing a pair of sunglasses. "Snape, you're my bestest buddy in the whole world - what kind of payment would you like?"
"No!" Martis snapped. "I refuse to allow you to do that, Snips!"
Bridget flicked a wet braid over her shoulder. "I need something like that, Spirals. Imagine how much better I would do!"
"How much more you can poison yourself," Martis spat. "Kells, you're a bloody alcoholic."
"Nonsense. Wizards cannot be alcoholics."
Sev lowered his head and muttered into his tea, "Then explain Divinations' Madame von Gruppen."
Bridget tried to look offended, but only managed to seem like she had smelled something. "In any case, I do not have a problem."
Martis brought a bowl up and poured glop after glop of porridge into it right under Bridget's nose. Bridget managed to control the nausea, but when Martis started to slurp her own orange juice, her control cracked. Had she not already worshiped the porcelain goddess that morning, she would have made a mess. As it was, the dry heaves were bad enough for the Prefects to carry her off to the infirmary.
"Nope," Martis said casually. "No problem at all."
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Miss Rowena Price, Slytherin House Mother, had been aware of what has been going on. She had tried intervention, talking to the girl, contacting her parents (who seemed to think her consumption of poteen had been normal), and even had Professor Penderdandis the House Master talk to Miss O'Shanahan.
To no avail.
She was at the end of her rope. In her own time of being Slytherin House Mother, she never had a problem with students becoming addicted to alcohol. Alcohol was not permitted on the grounds - Quidditch victory parties notwithstanding.
But Bridget O'Shanahan's poteen supply seemed to be never-ending and neither were her visits to Nurse Pomfrey. Once a month could be overlooked, but the last month had been two times a week.
And now she understood, this was the third time this week. And it was only Wednesday.
She had to speak to the Headmaster. And possibly expel the girl.
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Martis carried her books up to her room, tossing them on her footlocker then plopping into bed. Medusa slithered from around her neck and across the pillow.
She stared up at the canopy of her bed, the green curtains surrounding her, enclosing her, filling up her senses with their winter mustiness and...
She sat up and opened every window in the room, allowing the warm breezes to flow through the room and air out the smells of a dorm room.
Martis stripped out of her uniform and threw on a gold spiral-printed turquoise sundress and a pair of Cretan sandals. Great Mother, it felt good to wear those again!
Throwing on a few beaded necklaces with Snake Goddess fetishes and adjusting her sunglasses, she picked up Medusa and draped her around her neck, feeling refreshed. She headed back down to the common room and located Sev studying next to one of the windows looking into the darkness of the lake.
"Come on, Snips," she said cheerfully. "The sun's out, it's a beautiful day, and it's warm! Time to enjoy the world!"
Several people threw wadded up pieces of parchment at her for being too chipper.
"I don't like the world," Sev muttered with disdain. "Make it go away."
She raspberried him and picked him up by the arm. "Come on, Snips! We need some fresh air and you need a break from studying. I'll toss you into the lake and the merpeople will toss you back to me."
"No, thank-you."
Martis released him and he sat back down, his nose still buried in the book. Looking around and seeing everyone else also deep in study, she sighed and crawled into his lap to get his attention.
This seemed to be the right move as his book hit the floor, his eyes opened REAL wide, and he tensely froze as he stared up at her. As a matter of fact, everyone else was staring intensely as well.
"Now," she said. "You are going outside with me, or I am going to sit on you and make the protection spells go off."
"FOR GODS' SAKES, GO OUTSIDE!" everyone yelled, not wanting to be subject to the dorms' 'protection spells' designed to keep amorous students apart. (Most resulted in a shower of freezing cold water coming from the ceiling. If not explosives. which always got everyone else in the blast radius.)
Sev, blushing as only a fourteen-year-old boy could blush, allowed Martis to drag him out of the common room and up to the main floor, out into the Quad, and out into the countryside surrounding Hogwarts.
She released him and inhaled deeply. "Spring! Warmth! The sun! Everything's alive again!"
"Lovely," Sev replied in deadpan sarcasm. "Thousands of crawling, living things to bite me and make me swell up. Now, may I go back and repair what's left of my dignity and study for finals?"
"No." She pulled him along and practically danced across the field of flowers between the school and the edges of the Forbidden Forest. She began singing some light-toned song in Minoan, her voice flowing through the notes like honey.
Sev did have to admit, Martis was the better singer of the two. From what he understood of her island's magics, a lot of it was an ancient type, most of them going as far back as to the first recognized vocal patterns of language. Many of the archaic spells from her home were simply long, drawn out song notes.
A figure in a long brown cloak sprinted within the woods, causing both students to halt mid-step.
Sev felt his heart beat harder while Martis squeezed his arm. "Wonder who that is?" she asked.
"Let's not find out," he suggested, trying to spin back around.
"Snips, where's your sense of adventure?"
"I left it in my other robe. Let's go and not bother it." She yanked his arm and dragged him along. "Spirals - what are you doing? You're going to get us killed or worse! Dumbledore said we aren't supposed to go in there!"
"I'm not listening - la-de-da!"
Sev felt his knees give and wondered if she always got like this when cooped up inside for six months at a time.