There is an extensive list of things that annoy Arthur Callahan. A good majority of that list directly pertains to William Eames. So it was of little surprise that on a calm Thursday morning Eames had found yet another way to bother him.
It was a little thing. Well… it was always little things that irritated him most. In this particular instance, it involved Eames repeatedly singing "It's a Small World" while Arthur tried to work. Over and over he sang the chorus. It would have been a bit more bearable if he knew the whole song. But he didn't. So all Arthur heard was "It's a small world after all. It's a small world after all. It's a small world after all. It's a small, small world" on a loop. A painful, painful loop.
He had never hated a song more in his entire life. After 15 minutes, he couldn't take it anymore. "Will you please stop singing?" He begged Eames.
"Don't you like my voice, love?" Eames asked, voice filled with (fake) pain.
"You have a decent enough voice I suppose," Arthur stated indifferently, "but it's the song. Why must you sing that song?"
"…It's a great song." Eames answered happily.
"No it's not. It is possibly the most annoying song ever written." Arthur retorted.
"You have no sense of fun. Or magic. Your inner child is dead, isn't he?" Eames accused menacingly. With that, he started singing again. "It's a Small World after all…"
"Ya… well…" Arthur stammered. Eames ignored him and kept singing.
"EAMES! " He yelled. Eames continued to ignore him. Totally flustered, Arthur shouted the only crude comeback he could think of- "…YOUR MOM!"
Arthur couldn't believe what he had just said. He rapidly brought his hand to his mouth, but the damage was already done. Eames froze, a look of total shock upon his face. After what was quite literally minutes, Eames regained use of his voice.
"…Dom! DOM! Come here! You won't believe this!" He shouted across the room. It took everything he had to not break down in hysterics. He had to remain calm, at least until he told Dom. Then he could collapse into a fit of laughter.
Dom sprinted over, eager and intrigued to hear the news. "What is it?" He curiously asked.
"ARTHUR JUST SAID 'YOUR MOM'!"
"…WHAT?"
"I know! Isn't it fantastic?"
Dom stared happily at his best friend. He had the strangest urge to run over and hug him. "I… are you sure that just happened?" He asked Eames. A part of him still couldn't believe it.
"I couldn't make this up!" Eames responded. Dom had to agree with that point. With that, both of them collapsed into a fit of hysterics, unable to breathe.
Arthur just stood there, hand still covering his mouth. He had to escape. Finally, he grabbed his coat and ran out of the warehouse. Neither of them noticed. They were still too busy laughing.
Sam and I have the strangest conversations about what amusing scenarios we can put Arthur through. We really do. And this was the most normal. Which is saying something. Your Mom was her idea. It's a Small World torture was mine.
This story has also made me want to write a Inception Vacation fic. The team goes to Disney World. Hilarity ensues. Not sure if I will yet. But I kinda really want to...
At any rate, I hope you liked the story!