AN: Yes! I know this was a different story before, but it won't let me make a new story on mobile and I was never going to finish the old one so...

Valkyrie Cain sighed deeply, staring out her bedroom window. Today was the most boring day ever. She wished something would happen. Maybe she should call her best friend Skulduggery. With him everything was exciting. Before she could dial his number her phone started ringing.

It was him.

"What's happening? Do I get to hit someone?" She asked excited.

"You get to hit a lot of things," Skulduggery said the tone of his usually velvety voice worrying her.

"What do you mean? What's going on?" Valkyrie asked closing her bedroom door so her family wouldn't hear.

"I'll be over soon," Skulduggery told her. "Don't let anyone in your house."

"Why?" Valkyrie asked but he hung up.

She sighed and dropped her phone onto her desk. After unlocking her window for him, she plopped onto the bed. She moaned and went to switch positions only succeeding in falling off her bed. Groaning, she rolled under the bed.

She heard the window opening. She didn't move. "Valkyrie," he called. She didn't respond. She waited as he walked over to her bed. His shoes making soft clicking noises as he walked. She smiled, then reached out her hand, grabbing his ankle.

"Having fun?" Asked Skulduggery peeking under the bed.

"No, I think I'm stuck." She said with a laugh. "I'm going to die here."

"You're definitely going to die, but not from being stuck under a bed."

"How am I going to die?"

"Zombies." He said pulling Valkyrie out from under the bed.

"No such thing," Valkyrie said giving him a look.

"There is now."

"Oh?"

"Nye was experimenting once again and it happened to come across a virus that's been dormant inside all of us." Skulduggery explained. He sighed when he noticed Valkyrie had no idea what he was talking about. "It's a disease that makes people want meat. They take any they can get. Dr. Nye awakened it and now we have a very contagious problem."

"So, there's zombie but they're just meat lovers?"

"Yes, except that they need meat now. They're brains are deteriorating and they can't get to a store, so they take humans and pets."

"There's seriously a zombie apocalypse!" Valkyrie asked. Skulduggery nodded. "This is great! I mean it's terrible... But it's also great!"

"You're an odd one." Skulduggery said. "Go check on your family. They should've heard by now. Lock the doors and windows. Then meet me at the Bentley by the pier."

After warning her family and sealing the doors and windows as Skulduggery instructed, Valkyrie left. Her family thought she was going into her room. She ran to the Bentley. There was no one around but, still, she ran. Once inside. Skulduggery handed her a bag.

"New clothes?" She asked studying them.

"Ghastly made them," He said. "They're armored. Change now."

"Sweet!" Valkyrie said moving into the back seat so she could change.

"We're going to meet the others in Roarhaven," he called back. His eyes focused on the road.

"What if they're zombies?" Valkyrie asked, her voice muffled by the shirt she was currently removing.

"Then they wouldn't have gotten my text."

"Ah."

Tanith Low, Ghastly Bespoke, Dexter Vex, Saracen Rue, Fletcher Renn, Anton Shudder, and China Sorrows all sat together in a small building in the middle of Roarhaven. They were laughing and talking about they're impending doom when Skulduggery and Valkyrie walked in.

"We're waiting for Gracious and Donegan," China informed them.

"So are we allowed to kill the zombies or...?" Tanith asked leaning forward.

"Yes, but please make sure they're really zombies first." Anton warned.

"The disease is spread by blood and saliva, so don't get bitten or blood in any open wounds." Saracen warned.

"Also whoever survives and killed the most zombies wins a pizza and bragging rights." Dexter said as Gracious and Donegan ran into the room.

"Do we have to pay for the pizza?" Valkyrie asked, knowing his tricks.

"Yes, but you still won the bragging rights." Dexter said tossing a knife in the air. It stuck to the ceiling. "That," he sighed, "was not supposed to happen."

The others began preparing to go out. Normal people would've hidden inside, but they were not normal. They were warriors. Or at least most of them were. They laughed and joked about the situation while strapping as many weapons as possible on to themselves.

China and Fletcher had decided against going out. Fletcher was too scared and someone needed to get supplies. The others ran out. Some, Ghastly, Anton, Saracen, Donegan, and Gracious, were looking for a base. Others, Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Tanith, and Dexter, were going to have some fun.

Tanith squealed with delight as the first few zombies attacked their group. She smiled and dropped down from the tree branch she was perching on. Laughing joyfully, she began to take their heads with her beloved sword.

Skulduggery stood completely still, his gun raised. He killed them easily. Acting as if he killed zombies everyday. He looked slightly bored.

Valkyrie smiled as she was swarmed. She blocked bites with her gauntlet and killed with her stick. The stick had a taser feature that she didn't need to use. Swinging her stick like a baseball bat, she sent body parts flying.

Dexter tucked his weapon into his jacket with a shrug. He needed to practice hand to hand combat. He punched the monsters with his gloved hands. Their skulls broke easily and gave way to the squishy brains.

Soon the four ran out of zombies. Dexter plopped onto the ground. Followed by Valkyrie. Tanith went back to her tree and Skulduggery stood.

"And I thought today was going to be boring," Valkyrie said laying down on her back.

"So this is your fault then." Dexter accused. "You got bored and created the zombie apocalypse."

"No," Valkyrie said with a frown. "I'd prefer the skeleton wars to be honest."

"I don't care what kind of apocalypse we have as long as I get to kill things I'm happy." Tanith said wiping her sword off on a piece of fabric.

"You've all lost your minds, haven't you?" Skulduggery asked looking around.

The other three looked at each other before nodding silently.

China sighed deeply and wondered why she had to be left with this moron. Fletcher did whatever she asked, but he did it so wrong that it couldn't even be considered helpful.

"Hey, where should I put this?" Fletcher asked from behind her. China desperately tried to hide the fact that he'd scared her.

China looked at the case of water he was holding. "By the rest of the food and water." She said with a roll of her blue eyes.

"Ghastly, you can't bring all your tailoring stuff," Anton said as they walked out of Bespoke Tailor's.

"Why the hell not?" Ghastly asked locking the doors. "Someone needs to make clothes for you guys."

"It'll be fine," Gracious said. "It's not like you won't be able to go back."

"Yeah," Donegan said. "There's only the faintest possibility that someone will break in."

"Very reassuring," Ghastly muttered walking away.

"Zombies to your left," Saracen said spotting the creatures.

Anton's shotgun was up and shooting before anyone could even register what was happening. Saracen knocked an arrow into his bow and let loose. Ghastly punched any zombie that got too close to him while Gracious and Donegan did their best to pretend to be helping.

Gracious turned as a woman screamed. She was standing in the middle of the street, three zombies grabbing at her. He pulled out a gun, thought better of it, and ran to the woman, slicing the zombies by her. She smiled at him before running back across the road and into her home.

The woman watched the group of men as they killed zombie after zombie. She pulled her black hood farther over her blonde hair and frowned. Valkyrie Cain definitely wasn't there. Hopefully she was dead. If not, Kitana would gladly kill her.

AN: I don't own Skulduggery Pleasant. I wish I did. Zombie AU to start this off because I'm obsessed with zombies and it's Halloween. They're all mortal by the way. There wasn't much of a plot to this. The others will be better. hopefully.

Hope you liked it! Review? Suggest AU's?