Dante VS. Barbies
Disclaimer: I do not own Devil May Cry 3 characters.
Chapter 1
It had been a very good day of demon hunting until Dante came home, that is. His wife, Lady, was ordering a pizza, because that is Dante's favorite thing to eat. He went to check on his twin girls, Kalina and Ann. He opened the door to the playroom, turned white and fled.
"I can handle them trying to kill me or other people but not barbies. I can't handle BARBIES!" shouted Dante as he stormed into the kitchen.
"Now, honey, calm down. What is wrong with barbies?" asked Lady calmly.
"They are plastic play things! Daughters of the devil DO NOT play with barbies. They reek havoc and destroy things," shouted Dante yet again.
"They are half human, too. It is perfectly normal for 8-year-old girls to play with barbies. They ARE girls." said Lady getting annoyed.
DING DONG
"I'll go get the pizza and you go get the girls." Said Lady as she went to the door to get the pizza. She gave the pizza guy the money and set it on the table as Kalina and Ann came in. Lady wondered where Dante had gone so she searched the house except for the playroom. She went in to the playroom and Dante said in a mock Lady voice, "Oh, Dante. You are so strong and handsome." Then he went back to his regular voice, "I know. Let's do it." He makes kissing noises with the barbies as Lady gapes at him.
Dante looks over and sees Lady, "Um… I was just putting them away for the girls," he said trying to be convincing.
"Right, Dante, Right." Lady says sarcastically. Lady walked back to the kitchen to see the girls doing the dishes. "Thank you." Said Lady, "Now go get ready to go to bed."
Later that Night
Inside Dante's dream "Come join us in our plastic face community. You can look like this all the time." The barbies in his dream chant as they show Dante his face with a permanent smile and lipstick. "NO! You will never get me! AHHHHH! BARBIES! Dante wakes himself and Lady up.
"Whatsa matter, Dante?" asked Lady really confused.
"Barbies everywhere, trying to put lipstick on me and make me smile all the time. It was scary." Said Dante completely shaken.
"Go back to sleep, Dante." Yawned Lady as she rolled her eyes before going back to sleep.