Cutting the Gordian Knot
Hitsugaya Toushiro cursed the fourth time beneath his breath as his fingers struggled with the current monstrosity around his neck, which took pleasure in asphyxiating him.
Why the Japanese male school uniform would insist upon such a useless accessory is beyond the tenth division Captain as his fingers fumbled with the bit of red cloth.
A school tie.
Yes, Hitsugaya Toushirou, acknowledged as the child prodigy Captain of the Gotei 13 is being bested by a bloody school tie!
How embarrassing could it get? He and his team had entered the Human World a week ago, integrating – with more or less success – into Kurosaki Ichigo's class. He and Matsumoto are currently lodging with one of the Golden Quartet for the duration of their stay in the World of the Living, Inoue Orihime.
Said human hostess is now humming in the kitchen, cooking something for breakfast and preparing their bentos. This new habit which she incorporated into her daily routine – waking up just a little earlier than usual, so don't worry about it Toushirou-kun, and cheerfully preparing him and his Lieutenant a meal – as naturally as a fish takes to water troubles Hitsugaya, prompting an unfamiliar, unidentifiable feeling to clench his heart.
Why is she so accepting of him, so eager to assimilate him into the modern, Human World?
For an independent soul like Hitsugaya, who had relied himself for the most part throughout all these years in the Seireitei, with the exceptions of Momo, Grannie and Matsumoto, the encouragement he got from Orihime to trust and, to some extent, depend on her is completely foreign to him. It is the same kind of foreign as operating a toaster, which he nearly encased in ice out of frustration because he didn't plug the damn thing into the electric socket embedded in the wall. It is as weird (as human teenagers would put it) as the concept of having fun – he had no idea how to act and what to do with himself when Orihime took him over the weekend to the arcade.
He was overwhelmed at the strobe flights and flashing machines, nearly tempted to give a sleazy human male a right hook (and preferably a roundhouse kick as well to knock him out) for leering at Matsumoto and hitting shamelessly on Orihime. Hitsugaya was only placated when the scumbag got his pride knocked down several pegs when Orihime showed the latter up at … DDR, was it? If Matsumoto got her toned leg muscles from training, then Orihime definitely got hers from dancing. Not that Hitsugaya was looking in particular… (He would later learn that she actually has a black belt in karate.)
All of which is unhelpful in his current predicament as Hitsugaya angrily tugged at the red cloth which he swears is mocking him.
"Toushirou-kun, breakfast is ready."
"Hai, I'll come in a moment." Hitsugaya was too wrapped up in his fight with an inanimate object to notice his human hostess poking her head around the door.
"Oh, are you having trouble with your tie, Toushirou-kun?" Hitsugaya blushed a fire-engine red.
"I'm fine," he gruffly intones as he refuses to meet Orihime's eyes. As such, he does not notice until her fuzzy brown teddy bear slippers came into his line of vision that she is within arm's reach – no even closer, much closer in fact than he allowed anyone else when interacting with them. Discomfort and slight panic from decades of ingrained independence welled up in his gut at her proximity. "Wha-,what are you doing!" Hitsugaya nearly stopped breathing when her slim fingers patiently undid the knot at his throat with ease, her perfume from her wrists, no, her scent, something akin to wildflowers, home soap, and rain? assaulted his nose. The little bit that rested of the logical, functioning part of his mind marveled at how she easily conquered that devil of a knot he had tied himself into.
"Now let's see. How does it go again?" Orihime has kneeled down, her face on par with Hitsugaya's, as she gently drapes the tie around his white collar, pursing her lips into an endearing pout as she contemplates the ends of the red cloth. "Create a hole for the bunny to go into…"
She is every inch of a Gordian knot, herself.
Hitsugaya is startled by the thought that came out of nowhere as he contemplates the concentration in Orihime's unusual gray-amethyst eyes, the small furrow in her silkworm brows, the sunrise, sunset fall of her hair, held back by those two well-known six-pointed flower clips. Yet, how true it is.
Things that he sees as different and strange are second nature to her. Friendship and help are his for the taking, if she hasn't already accepted him wholeheartedly without asking.
In another person, Hitsugaya would have found such a presumption irksome, probably arrogant even. But in Orihime… well, it's Orihime. And Hitsugaya finds that is explanation enough, a good enough reason.
"And there we go!" The teal-eyed captain is drawn out of his reverie as he notices his perfect tie, nestling against his school shirt wonders of wonders without choking him. Orihime has drawn back finally, although Hitsugaya notes that a part of him misses her presence and scent – her reassuring, comforting reiatsu.
"Thanks Inoue," he mumbles, still abashed at his ineptitude with ties.
"Please, don't mention it, Toushirou-kun." Hitsugaya looks up in surprise at the wistful tone Orihime's voice takes on. The constant happiness he and everyone else expects to see Orihime with, takes for granted, is absent. He feels discomfort lace his throat. How is it that in just a week, she has become the axis of his emotional responses – comfort, discomfort, relief, happiness, embarrassment, relaxed? She senses, sees the discomfort behind his indifferent mask, smiles tiredly and tries to explain.
"I normally tie Onii-chan's ties before he goes to work everyday so I guess I am used to them. But the one day that I didn't tie his tie, the one day I got so pettily angry at him…" Orihime is trying to take deep, calming breaths as sobs threaten to break down her façade. "That day, he… he died." Hitsugaya's eyes widened as he took in the story. "He got ran over by a car. And… there was so much blood. I tried, I tried… I carried him to the nearest clinic, Kurosaki-kun's father's clinic, but…" Tears fell from grey stormy pools. "I was too late." Hitsugaya gazed helplessly at the crying girl, her struggle to keep herself from shattering, her self-loathing is noticeable in her emphasis of the last two words 'too late'.
"I was too late." She repeated slightly listlessly. "Afterwards, he turned into a Hollow and came back for me. I did after all during the first few years after his death called for him to stay, and to never leave me. How selfish I was, how foolish. If it hadn't been for Kurosaki-kun and Kuchiki-san purifying him, I wouldn't have been able to tell him a final 'See you later, Onii-chan'".
Hitsugaya has never been comfortable with crying females, but more worryingly he is a sucker for them. He had always listened to Momo's and on occasion, Matsumoto's tears.
Orihime notices him again, and furiously rubs her eyes. "I'm so sorry, Toushirou-kun. I didn't mean to unload all my thoughts on you. Come on, breakfast is ready! I have been self-"
"If you call yourself 'selfish' one more time, I'll…" Hitsugaya stops before blushing, unable to think of a proper, non-threatening threat. He tugs her to his level again. He notes his own shaking hands as he gently wipes the tears from her eyes with the callused pads of his fingers. "Your brother would never want you to think badly of yourself. It's not your fault, okay? It was the car that killed him, not you! Never forget that. Remember him, but… don't forget to move on. Forgive him. Forgive yourself, and let go… because there are others here and now who need you."
Hitsugaya sees the surprise in Orihime's eyes, and repeats firmly, "People who need you and will help you as well. Your nakama, Matsumoto, … me…" He surprises both of them with his admission, an intimate confession really considering their physical closeness once more, and the fact, he is beyond a shadow of a doubt, cradling her face.
Hitsugaya finds he can only breath once more when she smiles. How beautiful, her smile through her tears…
"Thank you, Toushirou-kun." And he finds himself smiling back at her.
There is no discomfort when they let go of each other and head out to the kitchen for breakfast. There is no discomfort as they walk to school. There is no discomfort that they don't mention again their earlier conversation.
And Matsumoto Rangiku tries to smother her smirks and giggles as every morning without fail, Orihime helps her taichou tie his tie for school.
Not that the two of them notice her sneaky video recorder …
… and the upcoming scoop she has for the next Shinigami Women's Association's meeting…
A/N Although it is considered a crack pairing, I do believe that HitsuHime can be a beautiful pairing. There's not enough fanfics of the two of them together!
Please review! And (man, this is getting old) I do not own Bleach.