disclaimer: characters are jk rowling's, song is owl city's "strawberry avalanche".
dedicated to: ellie (with the monsters) because it's her birthday and she's awesome and lovely (even if she never reviewed my birthday fic for her last year) and i love her :)
important note: if you've read my fic starbright sins, this will probably seem very familiar. the reason is because i originally wrote this fic for ellie's birthday last year, but then my computer crashed and i lost it, so i rewrote it for her as starbright sins. later, i recovered this version, the first one. therefore, yeah, both have the same ideas (paris, engagement party, balcony, etc.) because i tried to rewrite as best i could from my memory, but i rather like this version, too, so i hope you enjoy it, anyway.
(also, lily has green eyes because ellie writes her with green eyes and it's her present, so you guys are gonna have to deal with it.)
note also that because i wrote this last year, my writing has really changed since then, but this is a nice blast from the past so i didn't want to edit out all the trademarks of my older writing.
this is a world of dreams and reverie
where i felt the stars explode around me
-:-
He dreams of her, sometimes.
Twilight brings with it dreams floating on memories, flashes of happiness winging by like breezes you can only feel for a moment. An image surfaces, of happier times from a carefree childhood, and dances by on angel wings before melting away into the starshine.
He wonders if she dreams of him.
-:-
"Do you believe in love?"
Lily, in all her eight-year-old innocence, looks down at him from the branches of her favorite apple tree. A smile stretches her cheeks, flushed red from the chill of autumn breezes, and her vibrant red curls are tangled with leaves and flying every which way. Regardless, she looks nothing short of delighted, and the sight brings a smile to his own face.
"Of course, Lily-flower," Teddy grins up at her, extending his arms to grasp her tiny, cold hands. "Don't you?"
With a giggle, Lily lets him tug her off the branch and swoop her into his arms as she comes flying down at him. "Of course," she repeats happily, beaming up at him, safely ensconced in his strong arms.
"Good," Teddy says firmly, smiling, and sets her down on her bare feet into the dewy green grass. "Ready to go eat dinner? I think your mum's making pot roast again."
"Mm-hm," Lily hums, skipping away ahead of him. Randomly, in the middle of the sidewalk just a few paces in front of Teddy, she stops. "Hey, Teddy?"
"Yes, Lily?" he asks patiently, catching up to her with easy strides.
Lily blinks her apple-green eyes up at him. "What happens if you fall in love with the wrong person?"
Teddy stares, his hair shifting from bright turquoise to thoughtful gold. "I…well, that wouldn't really be love, would it?"
Lily tilts her head, considering. "I guess not. But what if you think you are in love with this person, and it's the wrong person?"
Teddy shakes his head to clear it. "Lily-flower, you're far too young to be worrying about stuff like this," he tells her, chuckling. "Heck, I'm too young to be worrying about it. Let's just get home and stuff ourselves with pot roast, shall we?"
Lily opens her mouth to comment, but he quickly scoops her up and sets her on his shoulders, and pretty soon, she's happily shrieking away as he races back to her house, his hair turning green with speed and her hair dancing in the wild breezes.
It's the kind of afternoon dreams are made of.
-:-
"Do you believe in love?"
She's still Lily, but not quite so innocent, not quite so much his darling little Lily-flower. Now she looks up at him, framed against the backdrop of the Eiffel Tower rising into star-studded skies, with her apple-green eyes shadowed and her curls elegantly tied. She's so different, and he doesn't want to smile anymore.
"Of course," he tells her softly, setting his champagne glass down on a nearby table and wondering just when they've all grown up. "Don't you?"
It's a pitiful echo of their former conversation, really.
Lily looks away. "Of course," she murmurs. "What would happen if you fell in love with the wrong person?"
Teddy's throat suddenly feels dry. "Does it matter?" It occurs to him that this is not the right answer, nor is it the best answer he should give this girl, his lovely little Lily, who's changed so much in so few years, who's standing in front of him, in Paris, at his engagement party, asking him if he's fallen in love with the wrong person.
He's not even sure which girl is the wrong one to fall in love with, honestly.
"I guess not." Lily's eyes dart back to him once, just once, and they're filled with moonshine and childhood dreams for just one, glorious moment.
High above, a silver moon glitters amongst stars that sparkle, and it feels like the whole world is swirling with light, except for the one little corner where he's standing, facing down this broken little girl, who used to laugh and dance and dream, who used to believe in love.
In this little corner, Lily's the only thing that's glowing.
But she turns around and walks away, and all those dreams fade, melting like stars into the velvety dark heavens, leaving him with nothing but air and broken promises to hold onto as he watches her go, so young and so terribly grown-up at the same time.
-:-
"Do you believe in love?"
Her voice isn't the same as Lily's.
Teddy shifts around under the white satin covers, his arms reaching for a figure that's not there and grasping one that doesn't fit quite right into his side. His fingers graze fair, unfreckled skin, and he smiles down at the woman in his arms, his beautiful, brilliant fiancée.
"Of course, Torie," he says gently, blowing away a blond curl floating in her face. "Don't you?"
Victoire beams up at him, curling herself into his side. "Of course," she replies, and her words take him back sharply through time, to that sunny afternoon under the apple tree, with Lily laughing and breezes dancing and a genuine smile upon his lips.
There's no follow-up question, not with Victoire, and Teddy slowly lets himself relax, brushing his fingers down her side until he touches the smooth silver silk of her nightgown. It's a striking difference from the light cotton he used to touch when he'd scoop Lily up in his arms and twirl her around the room –
Why, he has to wonder, does he spend all his time with Victoire thinking about Lily?
It's not an easy question to answer – and he's not quite sure he wants to. Instead, he closes his eyes, inhaling, exhaling, and tries to forget his dreams of a laughing redhead girl with eyes brighter than even he could mimic, of happiness bursting from the heart of an apple tree, of believing in love and laughing like children.
Victoire sleeps easily in his arms, and yet all he can think about is a night in Paris when his world spun around Lily.
-:-
"Do you believe in love?"
She's eighteen now, supernova-bright and dazzling, perched on the balcony railing of his apartment in Paris, looking at him through those apple-green eyes that set his heartbeat racing, a million stars dancing in her dark smile. Behind him, Victoire sleeps peacefully in the comfort of their bedroom, blissfully unaware of how he feels when he looks at her baby cousin.
"Lily," Teddy breathes instead of answering, "what are you doing here?"
"Visiting Paris, what else?" Lily replies easily, swinging her legs and smiling at him in a way that's half-childlike and half-ironic. "I decided I liked it so much when I came for your engagement party that I'd come back once I'd graduated. And I have, remember? You were there."
Teddy blinks, a hazy memory surfaces through the sleepy mist in his mind, of Lily running through the grounds of Hogwarts at top speed, leaping into his arms and fitting perfectly agaist him while he swings her around and around in delight.
"Yes, I remember," he says finally. "But why are you visiting in the dead of the night when you knew I was sleeping?" Involuntarily, his eyes shift to stormy grey and dart back to the door leading into the bedroom, where Victoire rests, eyes closed and back to him, a diamond ring sparkling on her finger.
Lily sighs. "I don't know, Teddy. I'm young, I'm impulsive, and I'm reckless. I can't sleep in my new flat, it's far too empty. And I wanted to ask you a question."
"What question?" he asks blankly, staring at her, at this little girl lit by starshine that spins and swirls and lights her entire being up the same way it always has, whether in the branches of an apple tree, in front of the Eiffel Tower, or on the balcony of his home.
She's Lily, he realizes slowly, and she's always been the girl he fell in love with.
"Do you believe in love?" Lily whispers, and in her rich green gaze dance the tales of a thousand princesses and all their knights, of dreams coming true and happily ever after, of all the things she's ever wished for and all the things he could never give her.
"Of course," Teddy chokes out, and for a moment, all he can think about is how she shines.
-:-
"Do you believe in love?"
It's his turn, the morning after the night before, to whisper the words to her. Here, beneath the stormy sunlight, he's never felt so naked as he does when Victoire rolls around and pierces him with her sky-bright gaze, so familiar to him and yet so much darker this morning than he's used to.
And so, so different from the green eyes he'd looked into last night.
"Of course," she replies instantly, lifting a hand to tangle in his inky black locks. "Why?"
Teddy swallows down the guilt and shame and regret. "Torie, I – I can't do this," he tells her, his words ringing loudly in the silence of their bedroom as stars fade and sunbeams brighten outside their window and her pretty blue eyes widen.
"Can't do what?" Victoire asks softly, but her voice is heavy, and he can't shake the feeling that she already knows.
"Marry you," he murmurs, gingerly touching the bright diamond on her hand, splayed over his heart. "I'm sorry – so sorry, but – "
"Right," she sighs, closing her eyes, and slides the ring off and into his open hand. "I thought I heard noises last night."
Teddy coughs. "Victoire, I – I love you," he tries, though it's a weak attempt and they both know it.
Victoire smiles sadly and straightens to a sitting position, utterly gorgeous against the soft, honey-gold sunshine behind her. "I love you, too, Teddy," she says, raising her ringless hand to touch his cheek. "And I do believe in love. Even still."
And then, with a light kiss pressed against his cheek and the lingering smell of apricots around him, she rises and leaves the bedroom, leaves him sitting alone with the hearts of two beautiful girls, one sunlight and one starlight, and no idea where to go from here.
-:-
"Do you believe in love?"
This time, his voice is loud and clear and happy, resounding in every inch of the almost-empty park in Venice, from the dewdrops on the grass to the birds singing in the leaves, from the sand in the playground to the laughter of the bright young witch in his arms.
"Of course," giggles Lily, leaning back against the trunk of a strong apple tree, so similar and yet so different from the one in her childhood home, and smiling up at him. "Don't you?"
"Of course," Teddy grins, snaking his arms tighter around her waist and angling his head. "Why wouldn't I?"
She meets him half-way for a kiss that takes his breath away and leaves him wondering just what he'd done before the days he could kiss her like this. All around them, a world full of light continues to spin and swirl and dance, and all those years of heartbreak are suddenly worth it, under the beaming summer light.
a/n: if you read this far, please drop me a review to let me know how i did! i'd really appreciate it! :)
and DON'T favorite/alert without reviewing first, please and thank you!