Hi there I just wanted to tell you, before you read this, that I'm French, so my English isn't very good, I'm sorry about the mistakes >. I just translated this fanfic from the French version and there are loads of things I didn't know how to say in English, I'm really sorry, this is awful, but I'm posting it anyway...
Please, R&R
SILENCE
POV Yuki :
He didn't have the right to tell me, that's it ?Well, he shouldn't have spoken of it so loudly, when we are living in the same house. So, I'm his only hope. His future depends on me. What a weird situation. Et franchement gênante. What am I supposed to do ? Let's say I let him win. It would be obvious. But honestly, he just can't beat me on his own. The cat will always lose against the rat. Akito knows this. And that's why he chose me, just to let him hope. Maybe he's delighted right now. Delighted because he played that trick. He knows Kyo will never beat me. And if he gets to know I know, everything will be canceled and this stupid cat will be locked in a small, dark room forever. I can't let this happen. As long as I'm alive, it will never happen.
POV Kyo :
I have to beat him. For my sake. And if he lets me beat him, he will die. That's why I'm not seriously fighting. Akito gave me the choice. It's me, or it's him. My life, or his life. I have already decided, it's gonna be him. I don't want him to lose. I don't wanna be locked either. But there is no other way… Yuki ad Tohru will live happily ever after. They'll find a way of avoiding the curse, when I won't be there to annoy them. Yes, he loves her, she loves him, birds are singing out there, and the cat is crying. That's selfish, in fact. But by choosing him, I'm making myself "happy", if happiness exists. Because I can't live without him. Even locked in the Soma's Manor, I'll know what happens to him, and, who knows, he may even visit me. If he remembers me. But if he loses, he dies. It is so simple and so complicated at the same time… Yes, I know, you thought I hated him, that's what I wanted everybody to think, anyway... He must never know. But in spite of everything, I'm still hoping, whereas I really shouldn't. Because I'm still trying, days and nights, whithout rest, to find a solution to this insolvable problem.
POV Akito :
Poor guys. That's it, pity them. They know nothing, and they blame me. But that's the aim of the whole thing. I can't help but being like that. It was foreordained ! Since I was born, they told me.When I breath for the first time, my life had already been written, until the day I'll die. And since I was born, they are telling me about that day. And I musn't try to avoid it. Because this is my destiny. And it's their destiny, too. Poor guys. They know nothing. Nothing of my dilemma. They're looking for happiness, and it seems hopeless to them. And I can't even dream of being happy. That word itself means nothing to me. Everybody is around me because I told them to be there, by my side. I threatened them. But when they are with me, I feel even more alone. An uncrossable wall of loneliness, of scorn, has been built between us. And I'm on the wrong side. I'm the bad guy here. Ironical, isn't it, that the bad one is complaining. Poor little ones. They're loved. They love each other. And that is something I will never have.
A single silence can be more meaningful than all the words you know. A simple gaze can express more than these usefull speeches. Body is a universal language. Ice versus Fire. It's been a long time since fire made their hearts burn with an unapeasable flame that will only extinguish with their lives. Yuki's looking at Kyo, and his looking back. They don't know wether to move or not. This night is gonna change their lives. They've got to make their decision now. They don't know what to do, but… Yuki doesn't know everything. Kyo doesn't know that Yuki only knows a part of the deal. It's just misunderstanding. They go out. No need to say it: they understand each other. They're walking, side by side, For a long time. Silently. They want to speak, but they don't know where to start. They appreciate that embarrassment because it's a proof of each other's presence. Suddenly, Yuki stops. So does Kyo. An impulse. An uncontrolable desire. A electrical discharge. Their lips meet. Frozen and passionate lips meet tender, smooth ans warm ones. A salted kiss. Because of the tears restrained for a long, long time. A fist kiss that tastes too much like a goodbye kiss. They don't know what to do anymore. And slowly, they are moving away from each other.
« You won, said the mouse, nearly whispering.
-If I win, you die, then I can't consider myself as the winner.
-If I win, you can't live anymore, so can't I.
-Uh.
-Uh. »
As the silence comes back, they are leaving. Each one on his own. And their pain tastes of lack. The other one's. But what can they do ?
POV Yuki :
Runnig away. Running away is like being weak. I do wanna be weak, if it makes me able to live with him. Even if I might die, we must try. Now, « I » don't exist anymore. We exist.
POV Kyo :
Running away. Running away is like being a coward. But I love him so much that cowardice is nothing to me. It's reckless, but it's the only way. What should we do ?Pray. And hope. Because if hope can make someone live, I'll hope for the two of us.
POV Akito :
What does it change for me, if they love each other ?They don't love me. What does it change for me, if they leave ?They're leaving me. But they have a chance I do not have. They don't know their future. So they can change itI'm the weak one here. I know. That's why I'm accepting it today. Because this day is The Day they told me about my whole life... It finally happenned. I can go now. Dying…sounds like freedom to me.
It's night. The sky is dark blue and we can perfectly see the stars. And beyond these skies, enlightened by the full moon, two figures are silently walking. Silence, silence, and silence again. Silence and hope are their weapons in this fight. Nobody knows. Nobody will ever know. They just want to live. And to them, living means « being together ».