A/N: I noticed how pathetically few of The Tapestry stories there are, so I wrote a couple. I got most of the idea for this one from the Fresno Bee comics, one called Get Fuzzy on Sunday, July 1st, 2012. Disclaimer: I disclaim. This is just kinda a humor fic, meant to make you laugh.
"David, do we have free will?"
"Who knows? That's like asking, 'What is the sound of one hand clapping?'" Max blinked. Connor looked up from his Mystics homework – barely having started it – and said, "Pff. Hey, Nerd One: No. Nerd Two:" Connor started slapping his palm against the table, making a clapping noise. David turned to him, slightly amused. "It's an unanswerable question. Like -"Connor interrupted. "Like when you ask a girl her phone number?" David continued, ". . . Like if a tree falls in the woods, does it make a sound? Max piped up with, "Irrelevant. It still squishes the chipmunk." David sighed. "You're missing the larger thing here . . ." Connor caught on to Max's line of thought. "Yeah, I think that the chipmunk got that." Then Connor flopped onto one of the beds, and threw his hands up over his face, dramatically starting to fake dying. "Aarg!" He shouted. "I'm being crushed by an unknowable crab apple! I'm dying! But at least I'm existentially satisfied!" Max, grinning slightly said, "Ha! I finally get philosophy!" David sighed and went back to his book. "I give up." Max stood up suddenly, walking over to Connor, who was still "dying". "Hey, man, stop coughing your lungs up on my bed!" Max hauled Connor up – who was still pretending to die – and shoved him over to David's bed. David looked up sharply. "Oh, so if he can't be on yours you shove him onto mine?" Max shrugged. "Better yours than mine."