Penelope sighed in dejection.
It was New Year's Eve, and for the very first time in her life, she was about to spend it alone in her apartment with merely a bottle of wine and some old movies as only company for the night.
That wasn't how the evening was supposed to be.
Basically, Penelope would have spent the night with her beloved people from the BAU, like always since Derek was married to Savannah. But now, the team would spend New Year's Eve somewhere between Florida and Quantico on their way back home from a severe case. Penelope wasn't happy about that, she'd hoped until the last moment that they would make it back in time, but she wasn't lucky enough. She also felt super lonesome today, almost depressed.
Penelope thought about calling Derek for a split second but had abandoned the idea as soon as it had popped up in her mind. She hadn't heard from him in a while, which she was utterly sad about that. They'd always been so close, each other's soulmate and from Penelope's view a little bit more. But he had his own family now and was very occupied...Savannah had reminded her about that fact the last few times she'd tried to call her best friend. The man she, besides, loved so very deeply.
"If you had a family on your own, you'd know what I'm talking about," Savannah had told her just last week in a not very welcoming speech. "He's got a lot of things to do for us, especially at Christmas, as you should know, but I'm sure, he'll call you back as soon as possible."
Penelope still cringed at the thought about that last chat she'd had with Savannah on Christmas Eve. It was just a week ago, but Penelope didn't dare to call Derek until he would contact her on his own. Savannah had made it clear that her calls were not welcome at all. But also, she feared that Savannah hadn't told Derek about her calling. Somehow, Savannah had been so different to Penelope, almost unfriendly, but she couldn't describe it for now. Also, the evidence that Savannah had reminded her that Penelope wasn't that lucky to have her own hubby and kids had hurt her deeply. Even if she wouldn't admit it in front of other people, Penelope had always craved for her own family, but, like continually, she wasn't fortunate. Her relationships with Kevin and Sam hadn't worked out well, and here she was. No husband, no kids to spend Christmas or New Year's Eve with. Her time was running out, she didn't get any younger, and slowly, she was giving up hope to find a man who would be able to blow off her feelings for Derek Morgan. Feelings she'd been hiding for many many years now.
"Why do you even think about it, Garcia? It really doesn't matter anymore. Your Hot Stuff has other things to do for now, maybe for forever. Get over him, go on with your life," she confessed to herself while she stood in her kitchen and opened her wine bottle. She poured herself a big glass full. Grabbing both, bottle and glass, Penelope headed to her beloved couch where some still warm popcorn already was waiting for her and one of her favorite movies she would watch tonight.
Placing the wine on the table, Penelope sat down on her couch and started the movie.
But she didn't really watch it. Eventually, she found herself lost in thoughts about the past year.
It hadn't been the best year.
Not really.
Far from it to be honest.
Her stepbrothers hadn't talked to her since her last visit besides Christmas wishes, but that call had been shorter than ever, and it was just Eddie who'd called her. They still didn't understand Penelope's behavior when she was back home, when, because of her, the murder of their parents had been set free. Her best friend, Derek, was missing in her life so much, Penelope didn't know how to cope with it. He'd always been there for her, especially at times when she would need him most.
Like in the past weeks, when she would have given anything to feel his muscular arms around her, to hold her and give her some much-needed strength.
Her kidnapping was still taking its toll with her mind and all the other stuff that had happened at work. Penelope didn't feel like herself anymore most of the time, and she really hated that fact about herself. She only wanted to be happy again, the cheerful woman she'd been all her life. But Penelope didn't know how to work things out. The only person who really could handle her wasn't available anymore, and she'd always count on him.
"Cheers to myself," she muttered under her breath before she took the first big gulp of her wine. Penelope then took a look at her clock. She still had a few hours left before the new year would start.
Hopefully, it would be filled with at least a few felicitous moments for her, she wouldn't ask for a lot, just a few here and there to cheer her up a little. That was all she was asking about.
"You won't get that blessed, Penelope, but at least you can hope for something like that," she murmured after a second sip. Penelope wasn't able to give up hope just yet.
And that was the moment, her doorbell rang.
Penelope frowned.
Nobody of her beloved people was here, maybe the people in front of her door just rang the wrong doorbell. So she didn't bother to stand up and open the door to see who it was. She wasn't interested anyway.
But then, someone carefully knocked on her door before it began to open.
It opened?
No one had her keys, besides Derek and he for sure wouldn't be here, why should he? He unquestionably was with his wife and son. Suddenly full of fear, Penelope slowly rose to her feet and placed the wine on her table with trembling hands.
"Who's There? I'm...I'm armed to the teeth, and I'm not joking at all. Go away before you get hurt!" Penelope exclaimed, trying to stay as relaxed as possible. It didn't work out as well as she was hoping, for her voice was filled with panic. Memory's of the day she got shot many years ago filled her mind, and if she wouldn't get an answer or the person would go away, she would absolutely freak out.
"Don't shoot, it's okay. It's just me," a very familiar voice answered with an amused tone of voice before the person closed the door and faced Penelope.
Her mouth dropped open for a split second.
"Derek?" Penelope only managed to say. That apparently was a dream. It had to be. Her Hot Stuff wouldn't have enough time to come over and spend New Year's Eve with her, he had better things to do.
"Hey Baby Girl," he answered with the brightest of smiles on his handsome face. Apparently, he was delighted to see her. "I heard the team isn't back from the last case, and I figured out you don't want to spend New Year's Eve all alone," he told her merrily and walked a few steps closer to her, already opening his arms for her. Penelope watched him with a big frown. So he was just here because someone had told him she was lonely?
What the hell was he thinking?
"So, you are able to call one of your former teammates rather than calling me back?" She only answered, crossing her arms in front of her chest, suddenly feeling the fear she'd felt earlier replaced by rage she hadn't felt before.
"What?" Derek asked, stunned, stopping in his movements towards her. His smile vanished from his handsome face. That apparently wasn't a reaction he had hoped for.
"What, what? I tried to call you so many times, and you didn't even waste a second to call me back. And now you're here because of what? Pity? Or did someone force you to come over?" Penelope felt her lips trembling in rage. She didn't realize how angry she was with Derek until he came into her flat without an invitation. Evidently, Penelope wanted him to be with her only minutes ago, but that was something else. Now, all she felt was pure anger, and Derek was here to get his comeuppance.
"No, Penelope. That's not why I'm here. Why should someone force me to meet the for me most important human? I'm here because I missed you Doll Face. You called me? When?" Derek, apparently confused, pulled out his cell to check his missed calls. "I don't have any...," he tried to start telling her, but Penelope cut him off before he could even finish his words.
"I did! Many times! Last time at Christmas, by the way! Didn't you recognize that your son got my present by mail?" Penelope asked Derek in disbelieve. How could he be that ignorant? "I tried so often that even Savannah was pissed at me for calling!"
She took a deep shuddering breath, before making a step forward to Derek, who was watching her wordlessly.
"I thought you were a friend, my best friend, honestly, the only man I could always relate on. I would have gone so far to call you my soulmate! And then, when I need you most, it's almost like you don't exist!" Getting more and more frustrated, Penelope couldn't hide a sob that escaped her lips and a single, angry tear that streamed down her face. "And then you're standing in front of me like nothing had happened at all? That's so not cool!"
"Baby Girl...I didn't know. We've been texting all the time, why didn't you say anything?" Derek answered, sympathetic. He, once more, pulled out his cell and tried to show her, but Penelope was too angry yet to let him show her, whatever he wanted to explain to her.
"We didn't text all the time, you kept ignoring me, Derek Morgan! For so many weeks! What makes you think, that showing up at my apartment right now makes anything better?"
"If you would let me show you...," Derek tried to convince her, pointing to his cell, but Penelope cut him off again.
"No Derek, no!" Feeling the need to punish him, Penelope stepped closer to him and clenched her fists. God, she was so angry at him, and for the first time in her life, she felt the urgency to beat him. The first punch against his firm chest felt so good, so the second one followed right behind, like numerous other hits.
Until she felt Derek's muscular arms around her, cradling her to his chest.
At first, Penelope tried to fight him. She really did, but at some point, her anger flew away, substituted by such a sharp pang of sadness, that she couldn't stop weeping anymore. Throwing her arms around his waist, she held on Derek for dear life and cried until she felt like no tear was left anymore.
"Let's sit down, Baby Girl," Derek murmured when she fell silent after a while and walked her over to her couch. They silently sat down next to each other, but Derek didn't let go of her the whole time. Penelope was very grateful about that. Together, they sat there for a while, and Penelope was glad that Derek gave her a moment to calm down before they would start talking.
"Can I now explain myself, baby girl?" Derek then asked calmly, still holding penelope in his firm, muscular arms. Penelope gradually nodded in response. Of course, she wanted to know what he'd been trying to say earlier, shed just been too annoyed and Derek had been there.
"I was told you had a new number. Now that I saw your reaction to my spontaneous visit I could bet that this isn't true, isn't it?"
Penelope shook her head, not able to speak. For now, she just leaned against her chocolate Adonis for comfort and listened to the deep baritone of his voice.
"I texted, and you answered. The messages weren't like those texts you used to write to me before, but every time I asked you if something was wrong, you told me you were ok. You didn't want to chat or wanted me to visit you. Said you were very busy. And I'm afraid I did believe you. That apparently was a wrong decision."
Derek squeezed her lovingly.
"I wanted to visit you, very often to be honest. I tried to talk to you, and that's the main reason why I'm here. I needed to see your beautiful face again, Baby Girl. I missed you so much, I can't tell."
Penelope carefully listened to Derek's words. Even if she still was hurt, she couldn't stop believing him. Derek always had been honest with her, never would he lie to make things smoother for him. Although she wondered, why Derek was told she had a new phone number. But she didn't come that far to think about that because Derek started talking again.
"Furthermore, I didn't know you haven't gotten the chance to see Hank. He was with his mom at Christmas while I've been to Chicago. I needed some distance and Savannah wanted Hank to be with her and her family."
That was the moment, Penelope looked up in surprise to watch Derek's handsome face. He was smiling at her, but also evidently waiting for a response.
"What? You weren't together at Christmas?"
"No. We weren't, and we aren't for a while now, " Derek explained with a slight smile. "I didn't want to tell you via text message. Savannah and I are getting divorced."
"Wait. What? I mean why?"
Derek once more squeezed her lovingly, before he started talking again.
"We both realized that we weren't made for each other like we wished we were. It just didn't work out as we wanted. Although, Savannah heard me talking in my sleep. I assume that's why she was pissed at you in the first place, and I'm sorry about that. Not that anything is your fault at all."
Penelope started at Derek for a long time, not really understanding what the hell was going on with him. And to her confusion, he chuckled in amusement
"You don't understand what I'm trying to tell you, right, Hot Momma?"
She shook her head slowly, still unable to say anything. Usually, Penelope wasn't that speechless and did understand what Derek tried to tell her. But right now, she felt utterly exhausted after her outburst earlier and was honestly confused with what Derek was trying to say to her.
"She heard me saying your name. That wasn't the worst part for Savannah. The fact that I said 'I love you Penelope' made it easy for her to end our marriage. I wasn't sad about it. To be honest, I realized that it's true. I love you Baby Girl," Derek silently told her, not averting his eyes for one moment. "It took me too long to recognize it: I love you so much, and I don't want to waste one more day without you."
Penelope stared at him in disbelieve, her lips started to tremble once more.
"Don't make fun out of me," she whispered. Penelope couldn't believe that this actually was happening right now. Derek wasn't a man who loved women like her.
"I'm not making fun of you, Baby Girl. I'd never do that, and you know it," Derek answered with a severe expression on his face. "I'm entirely honest with you Penelope."
She stared at him for what felt like a lifetime. Not able to say anything at all.
"Let me prove it to you," Derek whispered, slowly lifting one of his big palms to caress her cheek lovingly. Penelope watched him doing that but didn't feel able to do anything. Derek then tilted his head a little, and their noses met for a brief moment before she felt Derek's lips on hers. They were softer than expected, and Penelope found herself responding to his kiss after a short moment of shock. Outside, she heard the first rockets and colorful lights filled her living room, which told her the New Year had come. But then she closed her eyes in afford to enjoy this moment as much as possible. As they pulled apart in need of air, Penelope opened them again and, wide-eyed stared at Derek, who kindly smiled at her with the softest expression on his beautiful, perfect face.
"Happy New Year, Baby Girl," he whispered, pecking her lips once more.
"Happy New Year, Hot Stuff," Penelope whispered back, not entirely convinced yet that everything tonight really happened. Derek pulled her back into his arms and cradled her to his chest.
If he would still be here in the morning, Penelope thought, as she allowed herself to lean into his comforting embrace, the New Year couldn't be as bad as she'd thought it would come. With Derek at her side, she would be strong enough to sort things out. She still had to figure many things out, that had gone wrong in the past year, but right now, she felt able to face all the things that had gone wrong.
"Will you stay?" Penelope asked as she closed her tired eyes for a moment. "Please stay," she added silently.
"I'm not leaving, Baby Girl. I'll stay as long as you want me to."
These words, at least, convinced her a little so that she felt able to smile in relief.
Yes, she thought.
The New Year actually could be a happy one.
With Derek at her side, she finally felt complete and safe.

The End