Hello. Here's a new Casualty fic for you all! It opens in S14, just after Sean leaves the department. Hope you enjoy!
Out of Sight
Part 1
Tina started running as soon as her feet hit the concrete. She didn't pause to check her money, she simply threw the first note her hand found at the driver, not stopping to even check if it was enough. She needed to see him, she knew she needed to see him. To tell him … everything. Tell him if he wanted she would finish it with Max. All he had to do was give the word. The departures board loomed into view and using all her restraint, she stood, hurriedly glancing at the unfamiliar letters and numbers, eventually locating it. 15:46 to Euston. Platform 3. Glancing to her left she saw the directions to Platform 3 and took off with a run, she only had two minutes at the most to get there, the road works had seen to that. By now she was panting, but she could see the platform, the train perched delicately beside it, and Sean, sat on it. She was so close she could almost touch it. So close and he would know, they would both know how the other felt. But then slowly, almost dreamlike, the train began to get further and further away. Its wheels churning, taking it out of her reach, until it was gone. And Tina, finally exhausted, sank onto the dirty concrete platform it had left, and sobbed.
X
"Tina? Tina? Come on Tine I know you're in there!"
She could hear the banging, knew she should answer the door but she just didn't know if she could face it. It was Chloe, that much was evident, and she would obviously want a blow by blow account of what had happened. No doubt the whole department was now in rumour overdrive, trying to explain why Tina, a nice level headed nurse had gone sprinting out of the department after an ex-boyfriend.
"Tina! Open the door! Please"
Sighing, Tina removed herself from the comfort of her armchair and padded into her hallway, unlocking the door. She was already back in the living room by the time Chloe had removed her coat and found her own way there.
"Tina, what happened tonight?" her face was kind, open, warm, something Tina had long since forgotten Chloe could be. She'd obviously come here tonight for more than gossip, she was almost sincere in her concern. And Tina realised, she needed to talk about this and in the absence of better company, Chloe would have to do.
"Nothing. Nothing happened"
"But-", she interrupted, "You ran out of the department like a woman possessed. You can't be saying you just wanted to get into your PJs early?"
Tina shook her head, drawing her knees up to her chest, "I didn't even see him. By the time I got there his train had already gone. Too late. End of."
"End of? What do you mean 'end of'? Tina," she paused, pulling her chair closer to Tina's. Feeling for the first time in months like they were actually friends again, "So what if you missed his train? Call him. Go to London! Do something! You can't just pretend you don't have feelings for him"
Tina smiled, feeling a calm over her as she explained to Chloe something she'd realised as she sat sobbing on a train station platform, "But I don't want to. In all honesty Chloe, I just don't. I've spent the best part of two years in love with him and getting nothing but hurt and pain in exchange. And I realised today, it obviously wasn't meant to be. Me and Sean. This is how it ends"
"Oh Tina come on! Don't be so daft!"
"It's not daft Chloe! What about Max? I … I love him, I really do. And I've just been … I've been so terrible to him and he doesn't deserve it. All because I clung on to some hope that Sean actually cared for me"
"Tina, he loves you, how can you not see that?"
Tina paused, looking Chloe straight in the eye, "Chloe, he's moving to Australia. That's a pretty clear way of dumping someone"
Chloe knew from her tone that the conversation, at least the Sean part, was over with. Tina had made her mind up, and right now nothing was going to change it. "So," she asked, "What are you going to do?"
Tina smiled, a smile that only she knew was really there, "I'm going to go and see Max"
X
Sean sat alone as the plane began its journey down the runway. The seats either side of him were empty, flights to Australia were obviously not high in demand right now. But he was relieved more than anything, the last thing he wanted right now was some stranger talking to him for the next 20 hours. All he needed was some sleep, some time to think. To get his head together and try and convince himself that he was doing the right thing.
He'd half expected Tina to show up at the train station, or the airport. He'd found himself glancing around, searching for a flash of blonde. But there'd been none. She hadn't even called him, something he'd prepared himself for endlessly. Sean had known that that phone call was the only thing that would ever convince him to stay. The sound of her voice, just a sentence of it, would be enough to make him abandon the whole thing. But it hadn't come. Instead he'd been forced to go through with it. Eat his meals, call his parents, make sure his bag was packed. And catch a cab to Heathrow before boarding a plane that deep down he wasn't sure if he wanted to be on. He knew he was running away from his problems. It was easier to get as far away as possible from Tina rather than having to continually have his heart broken by her.
"Anything from the trolley, Sir?"
Sean shook his head, not even glancing up as he turned towards the window and attempted to sleep. But in that half state, no longer awake, not yet asleep, he knew that what hurt him the most, was that Tina hadn't shown up. That in two days she'd obviously put him out of her system and was happier now. That she would rather he was in Australia than actually deal with their problems.
That abandonment was what was slowly killing him.