Heya, its Donut here.

This is my first ever fanfic, so don't get too angry if they're very OOC. If you don't like my interpretation of Shikamaru then tough, I have a vivid imagination C:

This particular story was based on true events and (hopefully a true) person, namely Wolvine, my darling cousin who recently moved to Bangkok. When their stuff arrived, Wolv reencountered one of their old fears. Not the Grim Reaper, but a red, blue and yellow box, filled with childhood memories of being attacked by plastic yellow shapes. The addicting game Perfection. Anyway, apparently Wolv being Wolv, spent the following evening -and morning- playing Perfection, instead of helping unpack and go to school. Guess what? They only won twice. I know. So sad.

Anyway, I got thinking that it was a pretty awesome idea for a story, and since I've recently been filling my evenings by reading ShikaTema fanfics, I decided to try my hand at them. So here it is.

Rated T for language and anything else my brain may come up with. It takes place somewhere along the Shippuden line, after Asuma's death but before the Invasion of Pain.

Sadly, I do not own Naruto or the characters (let's face it. If I did, it wouldn't be called Naruto, it would be Kiba or Shikamaru or Kakashi or Shino, and it would suck), nor do I claim rights by mentioning Perfection.

LET THE STORY BEGIN.

(I found like nine errors just here Donut. Didn't modify anything but spelling. Even though I really wanted to. I'm afraid to read the rest for fear my eyeballs will bleed.)


Shikamaru was a mystery. He wasn't like anyone else she had ever met before, especially not like any man she had known. He didn't chase after her, didn't pressure her into doing anything she didn't want to. Hell, he didn't ever make a move, even when she went out of her way to attempt to get him to confess his obvious feelings for her, providing him with romantic scenarios, flirting outrageously. He just put it down to her teasing and tormenting him again. Her infatuation with the Konoha Nin provided great amusement for her brothers, especially Kankuro, who teased her mercilessly, taking revenge on the years of pain she had inflicted on him.

The so-called 'genius' complained about everything, even when there was nothing to complain about. He was lazy, often preferring to take a nap than to pay attention to what she was saying. He was sarcastic and blunt, often insulting her and braving the wrath of her fan. He was a sexist pig who just couldn't keep his smartass comments to himself. But despite all the faults she found in him, she was still deeply attracted to him. Maybe it was because of all these things she wanted him so badly. He was a puzzle, a difficult one, that she was solving piece by piece. The more time she spent on it, the harder it got. Yet Temari had never known when to back down. She loved a challenge.

The main problem in their strange relationship was the Kunoichi's siblings. Kankuro would pester them constantly, convinced that Shikamaru would rape his sister the moment his back was turned. He'd find a way to destroy the few plans they had, and he had made it clear that he did not like the Leaf Shinobi one bit. The puppet master was easily handled with a knock on the head. Gaara on the other hand was a much more complex matter. He did not openly display his annoyance. He had pulled Shikamaru to one side once, threatening to kill him if he gave him the slightest excuse. He had said this calmly, as if he was greeting someone politely, and that had made the Nara shiver, despite the desert heat. He had attempted avoiding the Kazekage, but Temari had insisted on getting him on her little brother's good side.

For several months she had been trying to coax him into having dinner with her family, but he had always found a way to wriggle out of it. But he had run out of excuses. The Hokage sent him to Suna on a C ranked solo mission, easy enough to handle. It simply involved guiding a supply caravan there and back. It would take approximately fourteen days, including travel time. Horses moved slower than shinobi, and it took them four to five days to make the journey. They would spend two days unloading and loading. It had all been arranged.

Normally he would get out of going to the Sabuku No residence by claiming he had to help with his mission. Unfortunately for him, Tsunade had taken the liberty of accepting the hospitality of the Kazekage. She suspected nothing, for many times the Sand Siblings had stayed in the Nara compound when all the inns were booked. So now he was stuck in their house, and he had no way of getting out of it. Fantastic.

"As if one of them at a time isn't troublesome enough," Shikamaru complained to no one in particular. He watched the people below him, talking to the Suna guards. He leant back on the dead tree, sighing. Examining his fingernails, he attempted to formulate a plan for surviving the meal. Temari had contacted him, telling him Kankuro would be away on a mission. Somehow, this didn't reassure him. He'd rather have in-your-face Kankuro yelling at him over a meal than having to face Garra's death glare.

The gates opened, and he gave a sigh, dragging his hand through his hair and pulling some sand out. Disgusting. He dropped down and followed the caravan into the village. He had always liked Suna. He didn't know why, but the similar yellow landscape was calming. It had a kind of rough beauty to it. All the houses, all the buildings even, looked the same. It was the kind of mediocrity he liked. True, the clouds here couldn't compare to his beloved water vapor in Konoha, but everything else was nice. At least in appearance. Temari complained bitterly about how strict it was. He did actually listen to her rants sometimes.

Temari rubbed her face, grumbling something under her breath. She had meant to get started on dinner, but had stopped when she came to the realization that she couldn't cook to save her life. The kitchen was a mess.

"Nara had better know how to cook, or we'll be eating leftovers again." She hated leftovers. They always 'tasted of fridge' as she put it. Shrugging, she went to the living room and sat down on the sofa. She was just about to relax for the first time in ages when there was a knock at the door. "DAMN IT WHAT NOW?"

Shikamaru flinched as the face of an obviously pissed off Temari appeared in the doorway.

"Damn woman you're going to make my ear bleed!" He clutched his sensitive lobe, his face pulled into a pained expression. He watched in slight satisfaction as Temari's teal eyes widened slightly and she took a step back. She composed herself quickly though, and punched him in the face.

"You're early!"

"I'm not sure anyone has ever complained about me being early before. Mind if I come in?" He clutched his chin, amazed it wasn't leaking all over the doorstep. There would certainly be a nasty bruise there tomorrow. The sand Kunoichi stepped to one side, glaring at him as if it was all his fault. "Why do you have to be so… So…"
"Troublesome?"
"Yes. Troublesome."
"You should really consider expanding your vocabulary, Shika-kun." Shikamaru groaned. On her last visit to Konoha, she had learnt that he detested the nickname only his mother and Ino used, even more so than 'Crybaby.' Obviously she hadn't let this knowledge go to waste. He hated sounding so much like his father. "Hurry up and get washed. Can't have you in the kitchen all covered in sand."

"Wait, kitchen? What?"
"Third door on the left." She shoved him violently upstairs, leaving him looking very confused on the landing. He stayed like that for a full thirty seconds before making his way to the bathroom and getting into the shower. His expression hardly changed.


Donut: Whoop! My first Fanfic ever! I'm so proud of myself for finally getting around to writing this C: I AM NOT AS LAZY AS YOU.

Wolvine: Well, maybe not as much as me, but you are pretty lazy. You just have yet to embrace your inner laziness, as I have. I AM PROUD TO BE LAZY.

Donut: Shut up Wolv. You're so lazy I base Shikamaru on you. Actually, this entire story is based on you. You have more than inner laziness. It seeps out of your very being!

Wolvine: Meh, just stop talking to me and budge up. Unlike you I have better things to do then sit around waiting for you to stop 'faffing' so I can do your editing.

Donut: Better things such as what?

Wolvine: … Sleeping. Reading. Eating. Mostly sleeping.

Donut: YOU SEE! But you're right. I should stop procrastinating and let you fix my drabble. Oh, and if you let anyone else I know read this, I WILL sit on you till you die.

Wolvine: … I am now afraid. You are a mean mean cousin sometimes. Now… MOVE. I NEED TO READ.

Next chapter will be up later. This was originally meant to be a Oneshot, but it's a lot longer than we thought it would be. Reviews would be nice, but hey, I doubt I'll get any. It is my first one.