Disclaimer: I do NOT own any of the Guilty Crown characters in this story. All characters belong to their rightful owners: Hiroyuki Yoshino and Ichiro Okouchi.
To whom this may concern, March 16th 2050
You know the stories they tell you in history class. You know what you've read, or looked up online. You will never know the true heartache that was called the Fourth Apocalypse. You will never understand the pain all of endured to try to keep humanity safe. I hope you will never have to.
I'm Shu Ouma, I'm writing this because I need to get this out. I hate feeling this way. I hate that I'm living and they aren't. It shouldn't have been me. It should have been someone else. I was never meant to be a King. Though everyone says otherwise. My wife would probably smack me right now if she knew I was writing this about myself. I'm still hurting. 11 years is not enough time to forgive myself for the choices I've made or the things I have done. It's not long enough to forget that it happened. I will never be able to forget it. I still have the blood on my hands. I still have the memories, the people I hurt, the people I used, the people I killed, all of their names and faces appear when I close my eyes. I cry every single night.
I lay next to my beautiful wife and all I can do is cry. You know, I became king by accident. It's a long story that I won't delve into but it was an accident. Just like meeting Inori and Gai and all of Funeral Parlor. They were amazing people and great friends. I am so lucky to have known them. I don't regret that accident. I am glad that it happened, it brought me to my wife and all of my wonderful friends I have. I just wish it all didn't have to happen the way it did to begin with. I'll never forget it, for as long as I shall live.
The choices humanity made as a whole were to keep us alive, but there had to have been better ways, there always is a better way. No, the Government jumped to conclusions. They made mistakes. So, so many mistakes that ended up costing a lot of lives, but they didn't care. After The Lost Christmas of 2029 they pretty much had the publics' "Okay" to do whatever they wanted. No one questioned it really. I know I didn't not until I met Funeral Parlor. My wife and I tried to keep Funeral Parlor alive, all of the undertakers still question the Government, we have to. There could still be another apocalypse. I fear it, I don't want my children to ever have to suffer the way we did. So we work, then come home and keep an eye out. Out of fear, yes. It's to protect everyone from the corrupt government.
The only reason I'm still here to write this, is because of my wife Ayase. Though she ins't my first love and I'm not hers. Mine was Inori, I lost her. It still hurts to this day. Ayase's was Gai, naturally I mean he was a lady's man. They both have passed on. We both still think of them from time to time, but it helps having each other. We both understand each other very well. We both do love one another, there's no question about it. We just, "click." Our son, Hisashi and our wonderful daughter Miyuki are the greatest things we have accomplished together since then.
No one should ever have to suffer. No one should ever have to be alone in this world. No one should be thrust into the darkness. No one should die for no reason.
-Shu Ouma
"Hey Shu! What ya doing in there honey?" Ayase spoke through the door.
"Nothing, just typing." Shu replied.
"Okay, dinner is almost ready." Ayase said as she started walking back to the kitchen.
"Do want any help?" Shu yelled to make sure she heard.
"Actually yes, I do." She replied.
Shu closed his computer after saving his letter, pushed his desk chair in and began to open the door of his study. He didn't have to open the door very far before the smell of his wife's cooking filled his nostrils. He took a big whiff and smiled. How could he still be depressed after all of this? "Easy," He thought to himself. "I just can't let it all go. I know she hasn't either." He sighed and walked out to the kitchen.
"I know how much you've been working and how you have been stressed so I decided to make your favorite, tonkatsu." Ayase smiled.
Shu just stared at her, every emotion all at once came flourishing to the surface. He then smiled, realizing the worst thing to ever happen to him brought out the second best thing he's ever had. Shu slowly made his way around the counter where ayase was cutting the cabbage and wrapped his arms around her from behind.
"S-shu, what's with this all of a sudden?" Ayase blushed.
Shu pressed his face into her back and paused before answering.
"I love you, I am so happy with you but I am still sad and I still think about her." He let a tear fall.
Ayase put her knife down, turned around and held her husband tightly.
"I know, I feel the same way sometimes." She smiled.
"It's just a part of our life now, whether we want it to be or not. I hate that I lost Gai, I hate that you lost Inori. I believe however that Gai wouldn't mind me being with you, I think he would have preferred it this way actually. I couldn't have asked for a better man to be with. You are the perfect person for me at this time. I love you Shu." She pressed her lips to his forehead. "You even helped me to walk again, Gai could have never done that."
Shu squeezed his wife, "you're right, this is how it should be right now."
"You're my rock Ayase."
"As you are mine, Shu."
They held each other for what seemed like an eternity. Wrapped in the love they share for each other. Along with the love they both share for Inori and Gai.
"I hate that I lived and they didn't."
"I know."
"I hate this feeling."
"I know."
"I'm so sorry."
"For what, Shu?"
"For feeling this way even though there isn't a need anymore."
"There is though, if we don't keep their memory alive then who will? We are allowed to feel this way. We are human, we have emotion and honestly if we didn't feel this way sometimes then I'd think we had problems. I mean we do, but still."
"Yeah, I guess you're right."
Ayase stiffened up and pushed him away shaking her finger at him, "I am your wife, I am always right, haven't you learned that after six years of marriage?"
Shu laughed and agreed with her.
Their children walked into the kitchen, just getting home from school.
"Mom, Dad? Are you two okay?"
Shu stood upright, "Yes son, we're fine, thank you for asking."
Ayase smiled, "How was school kids?"
"It was great mommy!" Miyuki replied happily.
"I'm tired though, what's for dinner?" Hisashi asked.
"Your father's favorite."
"Yum!" The children said in unison.
"Go get your homework done, dinner should be done around the time you finish."
The children sighed and reluctantly listened to their father.
Ayase and Shu looked at each other, all their worries and troubles and bad feelings about the past melt away. They leaned in close to each other and pressed their lips together in a passionate kiss.
They pulled away.
"Did writing that letter help you?"
"How'd you know?"
"Tsugumi keeps an eye on our computers dear, she just texted me. Oh by the way her and some others are coming over for dinner as well."
"Right, nothing beats pen and paper now a days."
They laughed and kissed again.
AN: Okay so … I don't know how I feel about this. I just got done watching this anime and decided I wanted to do a one-shot to try my luck. I will be doing one with Shu and Inori of course, later on though. I did it this way to kind of give myself a peace of mind about the whole ending. I liked it, I just, much prefer happier endings. Though nothing was actually wrong with it. It fit the story and anime. I'm just saying, if it had ended up sorta like this or with Inori and Shu I'd have been a lot happier and probably wouldn't have cried. Anyway, hope you enjoyed! If you did, awesome! If not then I apologize but as every story on here is, it's fiction of the author's imagination, you won't like everything someone else writes and that's okay! I don't like everything either. Just makes you.. a person. (: Until next time! - CJ
