幻
maboroshi
When he first asks her, she assumes she is dreaming.
She doesn't ask him if this is the case. She doesn't want to be rude, not even to her dream Ichigo. She blushes brightly and says yes – of course, yes.
There is nothing romantic in the way he asks. She doesn't allow herself to suppose it is a date – the kind of dream that is so good, so perfect.They are friends, and will always be friends. She doesn't even give her own imagination a right to change that.
It isn't until after he takes her to the movies and to a cafe and buys her doughnuts that she sees how realistic it all is. Her dreams were usually set further afield than Karakura Town. She wonders if it is perhaps a very long dream, and perhaps she will have to live out a few days to understand the point.
It is after he takes her out that she thinks back to when he first asked her, flush and nervous, telling her that he understood if she didn't want to go, and wonders again if it was meant to be a date.
Perhaps not.
So she distracts herself with guilty thoughts. About how a blushing Kurosaki Ichigo is the most beautiful thing she thinks she will ever see.
It happens again. He asks her again, and she isn't aware that she could reply with any word other than yes. It is nerve-wracking and exciting even in her dreams, but she feels okay – she can't be doing anything wrong.
It feels much more real the third time he asks her. She has never once before dreamed about him taking her to a summer festival, complimenting her yukata, buying her takoyaki and sitting with her beneath the fireworks. Not once in her whole life has she dreamed about him burning bright red as he leaned in and kissed her gently. She doesn't give even her own imagination a right to suppose he is being intentionally romantic until he does that.
Weeks pass, and she guesses that the little things are going by quickly because she has never before had such a perfect dream. The other parts of her life – her job, her sleep, her meals – feel like nothing compared to the days where he takes her out to the park for ice cream, or to a restaurant and tells her to order whatever she wants. When he kisses her like that, slowly and clumsily, everything else feels insignificant.
She floats through this new, wonderful life with no idea of how much time is passing. One day, he asks her to marry him and they waste no time. They sign the papers in the morning, and spend the rest of the day moving her things into his apartment. By the time it grows dark, they have passed out on the couch with their tea going cold on the table before them.
She wakes up every morning in bliss. When it comes round to night again, she reflects on everything. She knows she will be devastated when she wakes up and sees that all this is just a dream. She never tells him – that would spoil the whole illusion. But he has ways of making her forget.
She promises him it's nothing when she is pregnant and she cries for at least a few minutes every day, so that he will pass it off on hormones. In truth she is so angry that her imagination is inventing this child, who may never really exist. She is angry at herself when their child is born, and she cries as the bundle is placed in her arms. She feels she could have prevented this heartbreaking mirage, she could have forced herself out of this dream before she saw things she would regret.
She wallows in guilt sometimes, when she has the chance. But she has a responsibility, even within her dream, to care for her child. She eventually distracts herself, thinking about how she was wrong, her baby's first smile is the most beautiful thing she thinks she will ever see.
Ryumi has her eyes, but is otherwise just like her father. The girl is reckless, and worst of all has endless energy. She keeps her mother on her toes, even when she is carrying her little brother. Daisuke is a duplicate of his father, but much more like his mother in his ways. The next and last, Yuki, is an even blend of them both.
She is too busy to be sad. She even almost forgets that her internal conflicts existed at all, until he takes a day off work, and they go to the park.
Ryumi demands ice cream. It's sunny, but not hot – but perhaps warm enough for ice cream. Ichigo takes the elder two to the truck and passes them the change. Orihime watches him as she sits down on a picnic blanket with the baby. He tells them what to say, reminds them to be polite as they place their orders. He pats them on the head as they walk away with their cones.
They return to their spot under the tree and sit down. Ryumi quickly loses half of her ice cream as it drips down her hands, while Daisuke eats his carefully.
Orihime breathes in and out slowly.
It will be so hard to recover from. When she wakes up, she won't know what to do with herself. This life feels so natural to her, she's not sure she will ever be able to live any differently.
But that was it, it felt so natural that it couldn't be an illusion. She decides that she is either cursed or mistaken.
Ryumi and Daisuke began to argue, but she had zoned out and could barely hear them. Ichigo shushes the two of them as she begins to cry.
She is quiet, unnoticed. She wants to keep it that way as she builds up her courage. Just how long will this dream last? How much time does she have left?
Pinch me, she says to Ichigo.
He glances at her, looking confused. But she feels the situation is now-or-never.
Please, she says.
He lets out a short sigh and reaches over. He frowns when he notices her tears, but her expression is firm, so he carries on. His fingers nip her cheek. But nothing happens.
She drops her head, and he hears her release a weak sob. I'm so glad, she whispers. She looks at her husband with the brightest smile he has ever seen.
What, he says, thought you'd been dreaming for ten years?
The children watch them curiously.
It's okay, she says with overflowing eyes, I know it's real now.
He leans over and kisses her forehead. Daisuke turns away immediately, while Ryumi beams at them from the other end of the blanket.
I'm glad, she whispers again.
And the sun suddenly seems to shine a lot brighter.
Another one finished! Eyy!
Just a pretty short one-shot I wrote in between planning a multi chapter fic! I'd really love to hear what you think, because I've been struggling to finish any pieces since Kaishi no Yuri and this one was pretty spontaneous – so I'm not sure about the quality. This is also outside my regular writing style, so dude, I have no idea.
Thanks for reading!