It has being a really tire some day. The classes went as usual, homework here, exercises there, and more homework in the end. Not to mention the hollows they had to destroy before doing homework, the hollows between classes and of course before going to bed, it wasn't as they weren't used to it, but yet there were some days that it became more tire some.

Ichigo let himself fall in his bed, exhausted from the long day, and more exhausted from thinking in the night ahead. The last months had being real madness, it was like something had gotten into him and was pocking him every time he saw … her. Ichigo glanced through the room to the other side, to his closet, thinking again about the raven haired girl probably changing herself, probably wearing now one of his little sisters pajamas, those suit her so well… noticing where his thoughts were starting to go he shook his head and opening the window next to his bed he convinced himself the atmosphere was to hot for him to sleep well (in his mind he new he was the one to heated to be able to sleep).

It was too much for him now, he knew inside what was going on, he has being trying to denied it for months now and it was quite difficult to do it when the girl was sleeping in his closet, in his room… so close… yet so far away. Why? He didn't know, but he was sure of something, she didn't felt the same way about him, and he knew it. After they came back of Soul society she changed quite a bit, she started trusting the others more than in him, she started to share more time with the others than with him, but specially with one, the one she loved: Ishida Uryu, but …why? Why him? God if it wasn't for the fact that he hated shinigamis maybe they would have being friends but now, how could he even look at him without feeling jealous of the fact that Rukia loves him? Going back a few months he wouldn't have cared this much, but by now his love for her was as strong as his will to protect the ones he love, maybe he thought even stronger, after all she was the one he loved the most. But she doesn't love him back, she likes to spend her time with Ishida, she started learning how to sew just to be with him, she walks with him after school, they share things like books or other stuff in class, they are always together at lunch whispering things into each others ears, spending moments together at the park, movies, stores, everything, all those things he wanted to do with her, and it was probably because he had being to proud to tell her his feelings, to closed inside himself, in his desire of protecting everyone and acting like she was just one of his friends when she was so much more than that. Now, he was really regretting not telling her. But it was too late.

All that was left for him was dream, dream of what could have being between them. He took a pillow from above his head (he has 2) and embracing it he fell sleep.

It didn't took too much time to pass before the closet door slipped open and a pair of dark shiny eyes peeped out of the closet to see a bit of the scene. A tear dropped from those eyes. Rukia let her face rest on her pillow, now that he was sleep, so she could have a good view without having her neck aching for weeks (like the last time).

Ichigo wasn't one of pillows, before he had just 1 and used it like it wasn't there but, since a few weeks before he bought one, a big black pillow, but he didn't used it like the other one, now he took the habit of embracing this pillow and sleeping like that every night, and since then every night for Rukia started with him falling sleep with his pillow in his arms and ended every time he started moaning words, and Rukia fell sleep with this hoping not to hear the name she knew he was going to say.

And again the moaning started, softly, not loud, and just barely loud enough for her to hear.

"I love you"

This sudden confession forced her to look at him instead of forcing herself to sleep. His eyes were closed and his hands were strong around the pillow, him nuzzling gently the pillow, between whispers and moans, Rukia heard how he confessed his love for someone, then she understood what that pillow represented to him… his love for someone, how ? … When? … she knew he didn't loved him but she didn't thought he would fall for a girl, she was just hoping he wouldn't look at any girl if it wasn't she, but it all seemed like he was in love, with some other girl.

Another whisper

"stay withhh … me .. pleassse .." "don't leave me"

How much love did he had for this girl? How broken she felt now, she never hoped he would fall in love with her, why would he? She was nothing but an ugly girl, her body didn't have any attribute a boy would like, they thought of her as cute, but beautiful? Sexy? Attractive? Never, she was nothing like girls like Orihime or even Tatsuki who didn't even try to look a bit girly or something. She had also lost her powers so, she was weak, ugly and useless, not to mention the fact that she was always pissing him off but sometimes it wasn't like she was trying to do it, it just happened by error, but almost always happened, it was a lost case, there was now way he could be in love with her, and it was kind of better for him to be in love with somebody else, now that he was young and all, he could choose a better life than the one he would have with somebody like her.

So, she will be happy for him, even if it killed her, she will be happy for him and above all she won't try to destroy his happiness, now that she knew she had to try to help him have the love of this girl and if he didn't have it she had to try to help him gain it, but for now, tonight she will cry, cry her heart out so the next day she will be able to sink her hopes helping him with the love of his life.