Daily life of a monster girl in Gravity Falls
I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!
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ATTENTION EVERYONE! I'll be briefly breaking my Hiatus and having a Halloween contest. I'll be posting Halloween themed stories, horror themed, or one's that end with a cliff-hanger! The story that gets the most reviews, will be the one I update on Halloween!(and maybe a few other surprises. heh. heh.)
And don't forget to check out my new "Shake Up the Falls" Challenge!
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Dipper sighed depressed...was it really only yesterday that Wendy gave him the 'let's be friend speech'...count it sour grapes if you must...but Dipper couldn't help but feel that if Wendy had just given him a chance...he'd have been the best boyfriend she'd ever had!(which admittedly wasn't so much as a compliment toward him, so much as an insult to all the other guys around...seriously, did this town have a gas-leak or something?)
Dipper shook his head of such fancy thoughts and reclined on the couch with his family. There's no point to it now...it's over...you blew it...it's now just an impossible crush on an impossible girl...
ZAP!
Suddenly, the TV was bathed in a weird glow...and Ducktective was replaced by-
HELLO, GRAVITY FALLS! I'M YOUR HOST SLENDERMAN! AND WELCOME TO BACHELOR: GRAVITY FALLS EDITION!
The Pines family gaped at the Eldritch abomination that was now on the screen. "What? What is this?" Asked a confused Stan as he tried to change the channel...but the remote did nothing.
"Yes, we got a REAL treat for you today! Today we hook up newly single Dipper Pines with a lady!"
"WHAT!?" Exclaimed everyone in Gravity falls. Slenderman continues on. "Dipper Pines is an introvert would-be-hero. Who's hobbies include: investigating bloodthirsty monsters, being an enabler to his co-dependent sister-
"HEY!" Shouts Mable insulted.
-and whistling to BABBA in the Shower!" Finishes Slenderman.
"HEY!" Shouts Dipper flustered.
Slenderman waves a dismissive hand. "But enough of that! Time to get down to the nitty gritty! BRING IN THE MONSTER GIRLS!"
Suddenly the scene changed to show a wide variety of cute monster girls of all shapes and sizes ripped from their home universe and unceremonially dumped into Gravity Falls.
Stan sighs. "Great...it's going to be one of THOSE days." He states as he grabs his thermos and begins guzzling booze.
CRUNCH!
No sooner had Stan started drinking it, then he started spitting it out! It wasn't just monster girls that were coming from portals...it was monster beasts too! And they were eating all the Monster girls!
"Remain calm, good people! This breed of monster only eats Monster Girls...more specifically 'Virgin' monster girls!" He explains with a laugh.
All the girls of Gravity Falls eyes widened in horror. "No...surely he's not-
"Oh, but I am!" Interrupts Slenderman! "You want to save the damsels in distress?...YOU GOTTA FRACK THEM! FRACK THEM HARD!"
He then quickly turns back to the camera. "Disclaimer: If any guy besides Dipper tires to 'do' this...his genitals will burst into flames!"
All the guys(minus the Pines family) who'd been rushing to the doors...went pale and aborted...
Then Slenderman shrugged. "However, I know my show isn't for everyone..if you don't want to participate Dipper...that's cool...just sit back, relax...AND ENJOY THE CARNAGE!"
With that, the scene switched to numerous fatality shots of Cute Monster Girls getting violently ripped apart and eaten...while 'Singing in the rain' played in the background...which somehow made the whole thing so much more disturbing...
Dipper said nothing for a few seconds...then sighed. "I have to do it..." He stated. Stan sighs in resignation. "Yeah...I know..."
Stan jumps up. "Right! You heard the monster! Were off to get Dipper laid!"
Mable promptly vomited. I am SOOOO not okay with this! Groaned Mable to herself as she trudged along grudgingly...
...Meanwhile...
Wendy reaches toward the door...then recoils. "What am I doing?" She asks while trying to laugh the whole thing off. "Of course Dipper won't take this 'challenge'! What kind of boy would be dumb enough to risk his dignity and life for a girl he barley knew?"
...FLASHBACK...
Who wants a Lamby, Lamby?...
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Wendy flusters...the sighs in resignation... "Dipper...that's who." She then runs out of her house to go help the underage kid who loved her...get laid multiple times...
I hate my life...
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TO BE CONTINUED?
AN: 'Singing in the rain' is owned by MGM Studios...
AN: I know it says "in-progress" but really I just don't like boxing myself into a corner. For now this is more of a one-shot that I might continue one day...but probably won't.
But, hey. Feel free to use whatever elements you want from this, if you want! Or maybe give me ideas?
Love me, flame me, review me