Chapter 1

Hetty King January 1873, aged 13

"If something should happen to me... You're very brave, you're the oldest and I know that you'll be able to take care of your brothers and sisters."

Those were some of my mothers' last words to me. They were her message to me, cryptically, in her final days here in our beloved Avonlea. Unbeknownst to me, or any of us children, mother was sick, becoming worse by the day. She tried to hide it of course, but even I had noticed that she had suddenly aged very quickly, and looked constantly tired. However, at 13, I would have never suspected that my mother would soon be dead. Instead of admitting what in hindsight was obvious, I made myself believe that mother was just tired, and that maybe she was just going to go away, somewhere, to get better.

I had read about places like that, health spas or some such nonsense like that, the rich ladies in my books sometimes went there when they were sick, or needed some diversions. Now, of course we were by no means wealthy, but I knew that if mother were sick, father would move heaven and earth to make her better again.

By the next morning mother was barely alive, neither I, or any of the children wanted to see her, but none the less father ushered us in to their bedroom, where she lay on their bed. Looking back on it, I know that seeing her, for that last time was both a blessing and a curse. In a way all of us were able to have closure, we knew she was dying, so did she, and thru that she told us what she wanted us to know.

She started with Ruth first, since Olivia was too young to understand much of anything. "My little Sunshine" she started, her special nickname for my little blonde sister, "I want you to be a good girl and listen to Daddy and Hetty. You can do that can't you?" Ruth was perfectly confused and terrified by the gravitas of the situation, but none the less nodded her head, and mother smiled at her.

My two brothers were next, Roger had just turned five a week earlier and Alec would be ten in several months. Respectively she made them promise to work hard in school and help father with the work on the farm. Like Ruth, Roger I don't think truly understood what was happening, or perhaps I am still babying his mind, as everyone says I do. Alec, on the other hand, understood completely. He was calm, and smiled as he normally would, but his voice was much quieter, more serious than normal, and his eyes looked truly sorrowful.

When it came my turn, honestly I don't know what I expected. I guess every girl, and every other person on earth, dreams that death makes people more wise, dreamy and less grounded in reality. But, Leticia King was almost always one for practicality in all situations, and once again as I leaned down towards her she repeated what she had said weeks previous. "You're very brave, you're the oldest and I know that you'll be able to take care of your brothers and sisters."

"I could never take care of the children, I don't know how..." At that time no truer words had ever been spoken in my life. I was thirteen, soon to be fourteen in June, and while I was the oldest, I was still a child in so many ways.

Despite my protests she smiled at me, "you'll know when the time comes." I lifted my head up and away from hers, turning to go back to stand with my siblings, but she caught my hand. "Hetty, I love you so very much. I know you can do this. I believe in you," and with that she smiled and let go of my hand.

"Alright children, let's give your mother some room." Father said, in what could best be described as false cheer mixed with desperation. He knew, just like I know knew, that mother was almost gone. There was nothing that could be done, except to protect the children of what innocence they still had. "Hetty..." he said, his false smile faltering by the minute "why don't you go make some toast and eggs in the kitchen for everyone. Good breakfast to start the day. And you all go down and see to it that you help." I was handed Olivia who looked both bewildered and depressed, and with one final look back I saw my mother for the last time.

We were in the kitchen when the doctor arrived, joined by my Aunt Millicent. Alec led them upstairs, and as he came back down our aunt was almost on his heels. Never a woman of sentimentality, she sat at the table between Olivia and Roger, and asked for some toast. At first I found the request odd, or perhaps not dramatic enough for the situation. Here our mother, her own sister, was in the big bed upstairs, dying, and she wanted toast. My promise in mind, and what little believe I seemed to have in myself, I stood up and walked to the stove, getting the toast she asked for.

As I turned around to face her I noticed something I had never before seen in my Aunt Millicent, something I failed to notice the first time I looked at her. There, sitting at the table was my proper, old maid of an aunt, all forty plus years of her. Her sour expression was still cemented on to her face, but instead of her being neat and tidy, as she always did, instead her hair was falling out of place, framing her face and making her look younger than normal. In all of my thirteen years, and the twenty years she lived afterwards I never again saw my maiden aunt look so disheveled. It was then that everything truly began to sink in. And, as I handed her the plate, I realized, nothing would ever be the same again.