I love Bella more than my own life. She is my world, my reason for being. To see her hurt is ludicrously painful for me. So, now, as she winces as the baby batters, breaks and bruises her from the inside, I feel the pain along with her. I have never been able to resist Bella, never able to deny her anything that makes her happy. So, this is why I did not try to force her into destroying the half-vampire, half-human baby growing inside of her. She loves him, and he loves her. He doesn't mean to hurt her, he's just too strong for her comparatively weak human body. And so, even though he continues to break her bones and keeps her in pain, I can't help but now feel overwhelming love for him. I cannot find one shred of hate for anything that makes Bella happy. Especially now that I can hear the baby's thoughts, I know he loves her, adores her. Just as I do.
Everyday, Bella gets stronger, due to her new found craving for human blood. So, everyday, my crippling fear that I might lose her because of this, dwindles a tiny amount. However, no matter how well she appears to be, we all know that this could still go horribly wrong. It's in everyone's thoughts. It makes me glad that no one can hear inside of my head. My fear that Bella is slipping away from me, is never far from my thoughts. If it should turn out that way.... If I should lose her.... I simply could not live through that. If this should be the end of Bella, then it will surely be the end of me. I must be wherever she is. I will not be without her. I cannot exist without my life, and my life is Bella.
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I could hear Jacob speeding along the drive and went to meet him in the garage. As much as I would prefer Bella not to need or crave the company of Jacob so much, I couldn't help but feel sorry for him. I understood how it felt to need Bella more than anything. I know the pain of being without her. So I understood how much Jacob was hurting right now. I never thought, though, that I would ever feel sympathy for Jacob Black, but I do. And now, I hoped my feelings of newly constructed allegiance was apparent enough for Jacob to see, because I had to ask him for a drastically huge favour...
"Is she OK?" Jacob asked, when he stepped out of the car.
"She's sleeping now. Rose is with her"
* The psycho was "Rose" now. He's completely crossed over to the dark side*
I ignored that thought.
"She's... better in some ways." I elaborated, instead, on my answer to his question.
* Better. Because Edward was hearing the monster and everything was all lovey-dovey now. Fantastic.* He thought, a little bitter.
"He...Loves her. Already." I whispered.
Jacob's eyes looked ready to jump out of his head. He mirrored my thoughts. This is what had changed my mind about the baby. I could not hate anything that loved Bella. Which is why I couldn't ever hate Jacob. I acted as if I didn't hear these thoughts and took a deep breath. I explained slowly, anticipating an explosive reaction to my statement,
"I'm trying to persuade Carlisle to deliver the baby as soon as he is back"
"What?!" He burst out.
"He's become too big. Bella's too fragile to delay."
Jacob stared for a long moment, recovering, then asked in a whisper,
"You think she's going to make it"
God, I hoped so. "Yes. That was what I wanted to talk to you about."
He continued to stare, unable to respond, so I went on. I explained that waiting for the baby to be ready was too dangerous. So, we had decided to act as soon as Carlisle got back... tomorrow.
"Now that I've convinced them it's safe for the child if we proceed, there's nothing to keep this from working."
I could see that he understood what I meant, his face contorted in pain and his knees buckled. He grabbed a hold of the car to keep upright. My sympathy and guilt for Jacob stabbed at me.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, "I am truly sorry for the pain this causes you Jacob. Though you hate me, I must admit that I don't feel the same about you. I think of you as a. . . a brother in many ways. A comrade in arms, at the very least. I regret your suffering more than you realise. But Bella is going to survive, and I know that's what really matters to you."
Jacob stared, his thoughts fuzzy. I continued,
"I have to ask you for something -- to beg if I must"
"I don't have anything left." He whispered brokenly.
"This is something you do have, and only you. I'm asking this of the true Alpha, Jacob."
Again, Jacob didn't respond.
"I want your permission to save her life. You know I'll do it anyway, but I don't want to break faith with you if there's anyway to avoid it. I want the alliance between our families to survive when this is over"
Jacob gulped. *Sam* He thought. *It's Sam you want. It's not my decision*
My voice turned pleading, "It is Jacob, and you know it. Your word on this will condemn us or absolve us. Only you can give this to me"
*I can't think. I don't know*
I glanced back towards the house, "We don't have much time"
*I don't know. Let me think. Just give me a minute here, okay*
"Yes." I replied, my body stiffening a little more.
We walked back to the house, passing Seth on the way.
"Hey, kid." Jacob muttered.
Seth grinned at him. Such a genuine, kind mind he has, Jacob is lucky to have him. We all are. We hurried into the house, seeing Bella was awake. I wished I hadn't left her. A huge, delighted smile broke out on Bella's face when she spotted Jacob.
"Hey, Bells. How ya doing? He asked her. Her smile got bigger.
I sat close to Bella, listening with amused interest to her conversation with Jacob. There was an undeniable bond between them that even I couldn't understand. Their silly bantering finished and so I listened to Jacob's thoughts. He loved her. Desperately. He deliberated his decision to the question I had asked him in the garage.
Suddenly, Jacob sighed,
*Fine,* He thought. * Go ahead. Save her. As Ephraim's heir, you have my permission, my word, that this will not violate the treaty. The others will just have to blame me. You were right -- they can't deny that it's my right to agree to this*
My response was so feverently sincere, laced with genuine gratitude and relief, that my family turned to look at us,
"Thank you." I whispered, so low that Bella could not hear.
I turned back to look at Bella, and she made a face,
"Rose?" She asked.
Rosalie chuckled, "Again?"
Jacob and I moved out of the way as Rosalie came to lift Bella to take her to the bathroom.
"Can I walk?" Bella asked, "My legs are so stiff"
My eyes flashed to her face, wary.
"You're sure?" I asked her.
"Rose'll catch me if I trip over my feet." Bella replied.
She stood and stretched.
"One more day." She cooed, patting her stomach.
"All rightly, then. Whoops -- oh, no"
The cup of blood Bella had left on the arm of the sofa fell to the side, spilling the dark liquid on to the white fabric.
Although we all beat Bella to it, she reached out to grab the cup.
"Oh." She gasped, then a terrifying ripping noise came from inside her body.
Bella went limp, Rose catching her in a split second, before she could hit the floor. I flashed to her side. I listened to hear the baby, my panic spreading across my face before I could speak. Bella suddenly screamed, a bloodcurdling, agony filled scream. She made a horrifying gurgling noise and her eyes rolled in to the back of her head. Her body convulsed where Rose held her then she vomited a flow of dark red blood.
Bella began twitching in Rosalie's arms, jerking as if having a seizure. For a fraction of a second, Rosalie and I stood frozen, staring in horror, then Rose whipped Bella up, to cradle her in her arms. We flew upstairs, Jacob running behind us.
"Morphine!" I roared at Rosalie, as soon as we entered the makeshift hospital room set up in the library.
Rosalie placed Bella on the table quicker than a blink and started ripping her clothes out of the way.
"Alice -- get Carlisle on the phone!" She screamed.
I hurriedly stabbed the morphine filled needle in to Bella's arm.
"What's happening, Edward?" Jacob yelled, in a horror struck tone.
"He's suffocating!" I shouted back.
"I cannot believe this is happening!" I thought desperately.
I hadn't noticed Bella had come to until she screamed, "Get him OUT! He can't BREATHE! Do it NOW!"
Another fountain of blood flowed from her mouth, and I held her head up, scrabbling to clear her mouth so she could breathe.
I heard Rosalie hissing in to the phone to Carlisle, and then saw her hand, holding a scalpel.
My eyes popped, "Let the morphine spread!" I yelled at her.
"There's no time. He's dying." She hissed back at me.
Rosalie took the scalpel to Bella's stomach, bright red blood seeping from the cut. Bella jerked but didn't scream. She still couldn't breathe! Then, in a flash, Rosalie's expression changed. Her lips pulled back over her teeth and her eyes, black with thirst, widened, glinting.
"No, Rose!" I roared. My hands, still holding Bella, could not get a hold of her.
Instantaneously, Jacob threw himself over the table and smashed his hand into Rosalie's face, throwing her in to the door frame. Alice was there in the same second, dragging Rosalie in to the hall by her throat. Thank god for Alice!
"Alice, get her out of here!" I yelled to her, "Take her to Jasper and keep her there! Jacob, I need you!" I yelled to him, turning my back on my sisters.
Jacob was too slow for me!
"CPR?" I growled at him.
"Yes!" He said breathlessly, rushing over to Bella, lying choking, on the table.
"Get her breathing! I've got to get him out before --- "
A defining crack from inside Bella's body cut me off. Jacob and I froze, waiting for Bella's scream. Nothing. Her body went limp. . .
"Her spine," I whispered, horrified.
"Get it out of her!" Jacob hissed, throwing the scalpel at me, "She won't feel anything now"
Jacob went to her mouth, blowing air into her lungs, keeping her breathing. I could hear his desperate, pleading thoughts,
*Keep it going. You promised. Keep your heart beating!*
I took the scalpel across Bella's stomach, as quick as a flash. Her blood leaked out and dripped on to the table and the floor. I stared at her stomach for half a second, then bared my teeth. I bit through the hard vampire skin, protecting the baby. Jacob continued to help Bella breathe.
"You stay with me now, Bella!" I heard him almost scream at her, "Do you hear me? Stay! You're not leaving me! Keep your heart beating"
I caught a glimpse of Jacob, staring into Bella's rolling eyes, his own full of painful desperation. Finally, ripping through the stone hard skin, I felt Bella's body give up. I stared at Bella's stomach, reaching in to the bulge. . .
I blinked stupidly at the wonder in my hands,
"Renesmee." I whispered in surprise.
Not little Edward Jacob as Bella had predicted. A daughter. Our daughter. . .
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"Let me. . ." I suddenly heard Bella croak, "give her to me"
I gently laid the baby in her arms.
"Renes. . .mee. So. . .Beautiful." And she gasped in pain.
I grabbed the baby out of Bella's arms. Renesmee had bitten her!
"No, Renesmee." I scalded her quietly.
I heard Bella's heart falter for a short half second, then Jacob's hands were back at her chest. He counted the rhythm in his head. *One. Two. Three. Four*
"What are you waiting for?" Jacob breathed at me, his eyes swimming with tears he tried not to shed.
"Take the baby." I almost yelled at him.
"Throw it out the window." He growled at me, still pumping Bella's chest.
"Give her to me." I heard Rosalie chime from the doorway.
Jacob and I snarled at her at the same time.
"I've got it under control," Rosalie insisted, "Give me the baby, Edward. I'll take care of her until Bella. . ." She trailed off.
I reluctantly handed the baby to Rosalie, and walked up behind Jacob. "Move your hands, Jacob." I insisted, moving towards Bella with a syringe, full of silver liquid.
"What's that?" Jacob asked, as I knocked his hand out of the way, breaking a finger it sounded like.
"My venom." I answered, injecting it straight in to Bella's heart. It jumped loudly.
"Keep it moving." I told Jacob. He went back to compressing her heart, counting in his head again. One. Two. Three. Four.
I sped around the table, stopping to take my lips to Bella in every place I could, biting her. I had to get as much venom in to her blood as I could, and quickly. After biting, I licked over the wound, sealing it. I felt Jacob's eyes following me, but kept my own on Bella.
I hadn't payed much attention to many of Jacob's thoughts since rushing Bella up here, but what I heard now made me snarl under my breath.
*. . .Working on a corpse. . . too late. . . the need to be near her vanished. . . *
"Go, then!" I growled at him, smacking his hands away from her chest, taking over, breaking more fingers, I think. Good. I heard him mumble in thought again, *. . .Dead heart. . . *
Rage bubbled inside me, "She's not dead. She's going to be fine!" I snarled at him, at everyone, at anyone.
I heard Jacob walk slowly away, hearing his desperately lost thoughts about my Bella, dead.
"No, Bella! You are not leaving me!" I thought, as I compressed her heart, pushing my venom through her veins.
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I paid no more attention to Jacob. Let his "pull" take him wherever he thought he should be. "Good riddance." I thought, bitterly.
"Come ON, Bella!" I yelled, "Don't leave me! Please! I'm begging you, now, Bella." I cried desperately.
Still working on her heart, my body broke in to tearless sobs. What if this didn't work? What if I didn't get the venom in to her body fast enough?
Jacob's distant thoughts from downstairs caught my attention. I heard just snippets, but it was enough.
*. . .gravity of the earth. . . the baby girl in the blonde vampire's arms that holds me here now. . . Renesmee*
I snarled at his thoughts, "No! How could you, Jacob? You stupid MONGRAL!" I growled mostly to myself, " Bella will want to kill you, Jacob. And I'll let her"
This was getting worse and worse! I had to keep Bella's heart beating. If not for me, or Renesmee, then to kill Jacob Black! This was unbelievable!
I looked in to Bella's face, begging her with pleading thoughts, "Please, I need you, Bella. I won't survive without you!" I leaned down to kiss her throat and whisper in to her ear, "You are my everything. My life, my soul, my all. I love you, Bella"
Her heart glugged loudly. I caught my breath. I had heard that noise before. My breathing quickened, and so did my hands at her chest. Her heartbeat began to thump, louder and faster. A change of rhythm. . . a smile slipped on to my face. I heard Jacob's heartbeat quicken along with Bella's. * A frantic pounding, a racing beat . . .A changing heart"
"Yes, Jacob Black," I thought, " Bella will be here to kill you herself afterall"
I grinned involuntarily, I heavy wave of relief washing over me again and again.
"Thank you, my love." I whispered in to her ear, leaning down to kiss her throat once more.
"Thank you, for staying with me. I love you. . . Forever"
I let my nose sweep across her neck, breathing in her intoxicating, delicious human scent for the last time.
"You did it, Bella." I breathed in her ear. Then, I swept my fingers across her warm cheek, which now held it's very last blush.
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