Dear Logan,
My brother is being held in solitary confinement at the State Prison. I know it's a long shot but I'm planning to break him out. With your experience of prisons, I was hoping you could give me a few pointers maybe.
Familial Duty Man
Dear Familial Duty Man,
I think you have your facts mixed up. My prison experience does not extend to solitary confinement. And anyway your question seems more appropriate for Michael Scofield. Still, take care that you carry out your plan in the middle of the night, because the middle of the day is just stupid. Also I'm guessing you don't have any inside connections with the prison architect as well as no time to tattoo your body with the prison blueprints, so my suggestion would be to get yourself thrown in with your brother and then dig a hole. Maybe you'll find your way to China. Are you sure you want to do this though? Is your life so unimportant that you are willing to give it away for your brother who very conveniently got caught leaving you in this mess? Always trust your family to make life difficult than it already is.
Btw if you catch a glimpse of Mercer and Moe, give them a Mcfisty treat.
Good luck man!
Logan
Dear Logan,
I like totally hate my brother. He is such a hypocrite. All night he's out partying with his skanky friends while I'm stuck at home, tending to my Dad and his... friend. She's like so cool. But when it's my time to get jiggy with the guys, my brother is like so jealous. He won't let me go. Total hypocrite right? And then my dad's friend keeps me company, but I think my dad has some issues with it. I'm like so confused. I have no one to talk to because well my best friend is always more friendly with my dad than me. I mean like what's up with that? Totally not cool right? And then I watch Oprah, but she doesn't seem to answer my questions. I'm like so stumped. Help me out please.
Like Totally Stumped
Dear Like Totally Stumped,
I'm sorry but Oprah is not the answer. Neither is Doctor Phil nor Logan Echolls. What you need is to go see Jerry Springer and have it out.
I wish you luck
Logan
Dear Logan,
!%^ #~$ &** ***( )))(_ ?% ^*! ?()_ U(U )O_) ^)!)(
Mars to Earth
Dear Readers,
There has been an invasion. RUN!
Logan
Dear Logan,
The radio show guy is pretty cool. He keeps on dedicating songs to this girl whom no one dedicates songs to. And then he talks about all this awesome stuff which encompasses not only the campus goings but everything around the world. The 10 o'clock show is a must of his. Plus he has a great voice. I love listening to him. I'm such a big fan. If only I knew where his dorm room was. I'd be happy to write him a fan letter.
Radio Guy Fan
Dear Piz,
That has to be the lamest publicity stunt anyone pulled out of his ass. EVER. I think what you need is to travel to Narcissistan and be attacked by Killer Zombie Unicorns. Happy Ending
Logan