A/N: With this first chapter, I hereby inaugurate my fanfiction career. This story takes place between "The Girl Who Waited" and "The God Complex." Any constructive criticism will be appreciated!

Edit: *headdesks* I completely forgot to thank my friend Heathe for editing this. Sorry!

Disclaimer: I own all of Doctor Who. If you so much as use the words "doctor" or "who" in a sentence, I will sue you.

Chapter 1: Holiday

"So there I was, in the middle of the Industrial Desert, surrounded by Macra, with only a mysterious locket, a slightly used pair of dentures, and a very old library card in my pockets, and only eleven minutes until the wave of molasses would swamp the village…"

The Doctor gleefully bounded around the TARDIS console, pulling and twisting a variety of random levers and knickknacks. Amy was leaning forward in an armless chair by the console, listening with enthusiasm, while Rory absentmindedly leaned back against a wall, looking at the ceiling. Five minutes passed without so much as a stop for breath by the Doctor - some kind of Time Lord-y ability, Rory was sure.

Enough of this, Rory decided, edging his way toward Amy.

"Hey, don't you think it's time we asked him?"

"Hang on, this is the best part," Amy quickly whispered back.

"…and thus, the macra were defeated by their own sweet tooth, and I ended up with one GIANT stack of pancakes!"

Amy laughed and clapped her hands, causing the Doctor to do a playful bow.

"Was any of that even true?"

The Doctor gave a knowing sigh and spun around on his heels, and walked into the TARDIS kitchen while Amy gave her husband a death glare.

"Way to fuck up the fun, Buzz Killington."

Rory started to speak, but stopped as Amy stood up and walked away, pausing by a lever on the console.

CLANG!

Both Amy and Rory jumped at the sound of an avalanche of pots and pans tumbling down in the kitchen.

"Doctor, you need any help in there?" Amy called out, slightly concerned.

"No, no. I'm fine. Just forgot that things sometimes…fall on people's heads and…I think I understand why pans are considered blunt weapons now."

Amy looked back at Rory, who shared her bemused expression. Are you going to ask him? Rory mouthed. Biting her lip, Amy slowly nodded.

"Hey, Doctor," she began, moving past the control panel and down the stairs.

"STOP WHERE YOU ARE!"

Amy froze, gripping both railings to stop herself mid-step.

"Doctor?"

"Now, I heard you two earlier, squabbling about like a young married couple…"

Amy looked back at Rory in shock.

"I think he knows!" she whispered.

"You think? Just…play cool." he whispered back.

"What do you mean, 'play cool?' You get down here and play cool!"

"I'm not gonna-"

"What? Spit it out!"

Behind you! He gestured, pointing furiously.

"Wha-OH!" Amy turned back around to see the Doctor smiling on the stair below her, smiling.

"Anyway, SO! I thought it'd be nice for you two to make up with a nice, quiet…"

Please be clueless. Please let him have not found out. Please let him not know…

"BREAKFAST!" The Doctor produced a large, silver platter from behind his back. On it was a large stack of pancakes, slathered with thick, brown syrup. Pushing past Amy, the Doctor leapt up the steps and set the plate one of the console benches. From his pockets, he produced two forks, which he laid gingerly on either side of the bench.

"Come and get it!" He turned to the console and twisted a dial, dimming the lights. "If you two lovebirds need me, I'll be charting the trans-Antares antigravity seas with…myself. Alone. Hmm. I haven't travelled alone since…the last time…" the Doctor trailed off, looking absentmindedly into the distance.

"Er…Doctor? That's great and all, but…"

The Doctor blinked as his mind snapped back into reality. He turned to find Amy standing in front of the bench, looking at him with a worried look on his face. Rory was standing behind her, clutching her arm, as if in fear.

"But what? I know the syrup may have a poisonous, crabby aftertaste, but-"

"We-Amy'll explain," Rory finished hurriedly, pushing his wife forward.

"Hey! Oh, er…what Rory meant to say was…we sort of… would like you…take us on a honeymoon."

She closed her eyes, waiting for it.

"But I already took you two on a fantastic honeymoon!"

"Look, it's not that we didn't like it," she answered, "but we just want a normal honeymoon. Like, without the evil plant people."

"Yeah, and where would you like to go? Leadworth? Sunbathe by the duck pond?"

"Hang on, let's see if I can get this right. Four two…no…OH!" She snapped her fingers. "884 Delta 74-48.504-4."

The Doctor furrowed his brow. Amy shifted uncomfortably in place under his gaze.

"Those are very specific coordinates, Pond."

"Yeah, uh-huh. Memorized them off an ad I saw in Space Florida."

"Well, I'll pop them in and see where we end up."

Turning his back on his companions, the Doctor started to fiddle with the console controls. As the TARDIS started to rattle and shake, Rory turned to his wife and smiled. Amy only half-heartedly returned it.

And so ends Chapter 1. I would have called this the prologue, but I didn't want to throw the numbering system off.