TRIPLE DOUBLE TROUBLE!
By: JouYu
DISCLAIMER: We make up ideas and put other peoples' characters into those ideas! Whoo Hoo! Go us! (i.o.w, we don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!)
Chapter One
Somebody Somewhere is Doing Something Evil!
Today, something evil is being done by somebody, who is somewhere. In some place. You get the idea.
Anyways, Marik Ishtar sat comfortably on his wittle golden throne with his wittle golden rod. His wittle bitty mind was weaving an evil plot in his wittle bitty head.
"STOP SAYING WITTLE! IT'S NOT A WORD, YOU BUFFOONS!" Marik shouted maniacally at the authors.
JY:.....sorry.
"Okay, back to ME!" Marik snarled with a final glare at JY.
JY: (cower in corner)
Marik cracked his knuckles and stretched. "Ah! Being evil is hard work! Must keep my energy."
JY: What, sitting on your butt all day on a throne is hard work?
Marik narrowed his eyes menacingly. "DIDN'T I TELL YOU BUFFOONS TO SHUT UP AND GO AWAY?!"
JY: We're going, we're going! For real, this time! (disappear)
"Good riddance," stated Marik with a sniff. "Now, where was I...?"
The Egyptian walked over to a table holding a big crystal ball. Only, this wasn't one of those cheap fortune-telling crystal balls. It was used for a much darker purpose...spying on people! Namely, Yugi Muto and his stupid little friends (in Marik's opinion).
Marik gazed evilly down at the crystal ball. "What havoc shall I wreak today?" he questioned in a sing-song voice.
At that moment, a large old book decided to fall off of a nearby shelf and land on the floor, sending a dust cloud into the air.
"You...stupid...BOOOOOOOOOKKKKKK!" screeched Marik. "YOU RUINED MY MOMENT OF PURE EVILNESS!"
Naturally, the book did not respond. Everyone knows books have much longer tempers than Marik! Especially one that's been living with him for a while...
Anyway, Marik stomped grumpily over to the annoying book and swiped it off the floor. In the process of pitching itself onto the floor, the book had opened to page 527. The exact middle of the book.
"What have we here?" asked Marik, skimming over the hieroglyphics on the worn pages.
YOUR FRIENDLY BOOK OF HOW-TO SPELLS
SPELL #371: HOW TO BRING OUT YOUR ENEMIES' OTHER SIDE
Marik's purple eyes narrowed in evil delight. "Hehehe! Perfect!" he cackled. He quickly read through the spell, smiling bigger the more he read.
"Yugi, you have ticked me off for the last time! Now, SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"And I attack your Life Points directly with my Dark Magician! You lose!" Yugi exalted as his monster wiped out Joey's LP. "Naaaa!" he exclaimed, striking a pose with V for victory.
"Ah, man...ya don't hafta celebrate!" mumbled Joey, slapping the cards in his hand onto the living room carpet. "Just a little bit longer, and I coulda..." he fumbled for the words.
"Lost?" Tristan said, inserting his opinion.
"WHY YOU LITTLE!" Joey screeched, leaping to his feet and chasing Tristan around the living room.
"Hey, guys! Don't trample your cards, Joey!" Yugi called out, reaching out to pick them up for his friend.
"Ah, I don't care! They're worthless!" the blond exclaimed, narrowly missing punching Tristan in the face.
"Why? Just cuz you've lost to Yugi for the fifth time in a row?!" narked Tristan, dancing out of Joey's reach.
"I'm gonna kill you, Tristan!" growled Joey in a dangerous sing-song voice. He clenched his fists as if he wanted nothing more than to wrap them around Tristan's neck and..."SQUEEZE!"
Tristan blinked. "Squeeze? Huh? You're crazy."
Yugi's grandpa chose that exact moment to pop his head into the living room. "Hey kids! Come to the kitchen if you want cookies and milk!"
"FOOD?!" exclaimed Joey, momentarily forgetting about Tristan. "I claim all the cookies!"
"Not if I get there first!" challenged Tristan. They glared at each other for a split second before charging wildly into the kitchen.
Tea sweat dropped. "You'd think they hadn't eaten in a month..."
"Hey! Dueling takes a lot outta ya!" came Joey's voice from the kitchen.
"Don't ya mean LOSING?" Tristan was heard to say.
"HEY!"
There came the sound of milk splashing onto someone's face, and a cookie sailed out of the kitchen, hit Yugi in the face, and dropped to the floor. Ignoring the crumbs on his face, Yugi picked up the cookie and bit into it.
"Yummy! Chocolate chip!"
"YOU GOT MILK ALL OVER MY NEW SHIRT!" an angry voice screamed from the kitchen.
"IT'S WHITE, AND MILK'S WHITE, SO IT DON'T MATTER!" Tristan retorted loudly.
There then came the sound of a blood-curdling scream and a resounding thunk.
"OW!"
"SERVES YOU RIGHT!"
Tea glanced warily at the kitchen. "I think we should go in there before they break your grandpa's plates," she said, beginning to get up.
"Don't worry!" chirped Yugi. "Grandpa knows them! He uses paper plates whenever they're here!"
"Stop throwing my milk and cookies all over the kitchen! I made them for everybody, not just for you two!" Grandpa yelled, chasing Joey and Tristan out of the kitchen with a rolling pin.
As the two boys pitched themselves behind the couch for safety, Grandpa turned to Yugi and Tea with a pleasant smile. "Would you two like some cookies?"
"No thanks, I'll pass," Tea said with a shaky smile.
"Heck yeah! Bring on the chocolate!" Yugi chirped, running into the kitchen and grabbing himself three cookies. "Hey Joey! Wanna duel some more?" he asked as he bounded into the living room, stuffing a cookie in his mouth as he went.
"Now, now! Don't forget your schoolwork, kids!" Grandpa reminded them pleasantly, as if schoolwork was the funnest damn thing to do.
Yugi stopped in mid-bound and dropped his last cookie. "S-schoolwork?"
"Yeah! What's this schoolwork yer talkin' about?" Joey asked in the middle of preparing his deck.
"Now, don't tell me you've already forgot about your essays?!" Grandpa said a little too enthusiastically. His answer was a chorus of groans.
"I guess we should go to my room and...work," Yugi said dully.
"Guess so," Tristan answered lifelessly.
"Oh, come on! It can't be that bad!" Grandpa chimed in happily.
"So...remind me again why we have to do this," Tristan said, glaring at the college-ruled paper as though it was the paper's fault he had to write an essay.
Tea sighed in exasperation and picked up the essay prompt. "'Your assignment is to tap into your other self by writing a five-page essay about how you would be as a person totally opposite in personality from yourself. Due in two weeks! Have fun!' "
"That's a load of crap!" Joey announced vehemently. "It's third-grader work! We're sophomores in high school, here!"
"Well, I don't see anything on your paper," Tristan pointed out in a sing-song voice.
"Well...er....shut up, Tristan!" Joey snapped. "Besides, you only have a paragraph!"
"It's more'n you got!"
"Ah, shut up!"
"BOTH of you shut up!" Tea exclaimed, slapping both their faces simultaneously.
"Ouch! That hurt!" Joey whined, rubbing his left cheek.
"I know, Joey," said Tea calmly. "It was supposed to."
Yugi noticed the tension between his friends and said happily, "Come on guys, let's work on our essays together!" Three pairs of eyes turned to glare at him. "What?"
"That's easy for you to say! You're already DONE with yours!" Joey exclaimed, shoving his blank paper into Yugi's lap. "Be a pal, and do mine for me, huh?"
"I...um...ah, that is...." Yugi stammered.
"He's not you (thank heaven!), so he can't write a paper ABOUT YOUR OPPOSITE!" Tea snapped, snatching the paper from Yugi's lap, crumpling it up and tossing it at Joey's face.
"Hey! You ruined my paper!" Joey squawked as he tried to un-crinkle it.
"Well, since there wasn't anything on it..." Tristan began in a philosophical voice.
"Tristan, don't you dare finish that sentence if you want to continue living on this planet!" Joey snapped, making his friend laugh.
"Shut up, you two buffoons!" Tea shouted loudly.
"Hey, somebody's sounding like Marik here!" Joey snickered.
"You need to tell us something, Tea?" Tristan asked innocently. Both of them nudged Yugi not-so-inconspicuously in the ribs.
"Say something!" they hissed at him.
Yugi sweat dropped. "Uh...hmm...no need to be....talking like stupid old Marik? Hehe?"
JY: So...you like?
Marik: Do I win this time?
JY: ....er...maybe?
Marik: SAY YES, YOU BUFFOONS!
JY: Yes, you buffoons!
Marik: THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!
JY: Yup! That's why we said it, ya know!
Marik: YOU WILL BOTH BE MY OBEDIENT MIND SLAVES!
JY: Heh. I don't think so, scooter!
Marik: MY NAME ISN'T SCOOTER!
JY: Yup! We know!
Joey: Uh...while they're fighting...GIMME A COOKIE!
Tea: (slaps Joey) Ahem?
Joey: Oh...I mean...r&r, please!