Beckett left Dr. Burke's office feeling a little drained, but also more hopeful then she had in a very long time. Despite having just gone though the most difficult week she had experienced since her shooting, she felt a sense of renewal, The intense PTSD she had just dealt with, had completely broken her down, but hitting rock bottom, had also forced her to make a decision about the direction her life was going. With a little guidance from Dr. Burke, she was finally able to see a glimpse of the sun, through the formidable clouds, which had blocked it from her view, since her mother's murder.

"I want to be more then who I am." she just told Dr. Burke and she meant it. Beckett was ready to reclaim the woman she was born to be. She knew that she had some tough work ahead of her, in order to accomplish this. However, the fact that she had finally made the desicion, not to let the tragedy of her mother's death, dictate how she lived her life anymore, was a huge first step for her.

She slid her key into her front door and stepped into her apartment. The memory of two nights ago, when in the throws of a terrifying PTSD episode, she had downed way to much alcohol and sliced up her arm, were painfully fresh in her mind. She didn't want any negativity from her past, recent or otherwise, to taint her new found feelings of hope. There was a part of her that was exhausted, but she also knew that she didn't want to spend the evening sitting alone in her apartment. It would be far too easy to let her mind drift into those, all too familiar, oppressive places and she so desperately wanted to put all of that behind her.

She glanced around her living room. Her eyes settled on a copy of Heat Wave which was sitting on her coffee table. She had pulled it off her bookshelf last night. Though she would never admit it to Castle, she would often reread certain passages of the Heat books, usually the Nikki and Rook parts. Castle's words had always provided her with an escape when she needed one. They had been a source of comfort for her, long before she ever knew him personally. Her thoughts turned to Castle. He had been so supportive this past week, not pushing and giving her some space, while at the same time making sure she got what she needed, to be strong and get through everything. Espo had told her today after Castle left, that Castle had been the first one to notice how serious her condition was getting and had asked Espo to try and help her. She smiled at the thought of him. The last thing he said to her today before leaving the precinct was "Always." The word had morphed into term of endearment between them and ever since her shooting and Castle's confession of love, in her mind, it seemed to hold even more weight, whenever he said it.

Without really thinking, Beckett pulled her phone out of her pocket and before she had time to analyze what she was about to do, she dialed Castle's number.

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Castle had left the precinct earlier, feeling better then he had in many days. He had been so worried about Beckett this past week, but today, she seemed to resemble herself again. She had been able to successfully close out the sniper case and conquer the PTSD that had momentarily crippled her. It had been distressing to see her in so much pain, but when she thanked him today, as he was leaving the 12th, he knew that she was feeling better, and for that he was truly grateful. He had a chapter due on his latest Nikki Heat novel, but for days now, he hadn't been able to focus on writing. It was impossible for him to be creative, when Beckett, his Nikki, was going through such a difficult time. Now that she seemed to be doing better, Castle felt reenergized and had been busy writing for the past few hours. Just as he was stretching back in his chair and giving his fingers a small break, his phone rang. He reached over and grabbed it, expecting it to be Alexis, but was surprised to see that it was Beckett calling.

"Beckett hi." he said, as he answered his phone.

"Hi." she replied, a tiny bit in shock that she had actually called him.

"Is everything alright?" Castle asked in a worried tone.

He was concerned that maybe she wasn't feeling well again. After wrapping up the paperwork on the sniper case, Beckett was off duty for a couple of days, so Castle knew she couldn't be calling about a new murder.

"What…oh yeah..no everything's fine." Beckett replied, "Better then fine actually." she added.

"Oh, well that's great Beckett." he said relieved, then added, "I'm happy to hear that."

He was definitely glad she sounded so positive, but he was still a little perplexed about her call. It's not like they spent a lot of time, just chatting on the phone. He waited for her to say something in return and when she didn't, he asked tentatively,

"So, is that why you called?"

"Sort of." Beckett said, sounding confused herself.

She took a deep breath, having called him, with no plan whatsoever, she was rapidly trying to gather her thoughts, before she made a complete fool of herself.

"Listen Castle," she said, before pausing briefly and swallowing hard.

"I…..well, I was wondering if you had any plans this evening?" she finally managed to utter.

Beckett felt her heart start to thump in her chest.

"Plans, no….I have no plans tonight." he answered, as a grin started to spread across his face.

"Actually, I've been writing non stop, since I left the precinct and quite frankly, I could use a break." he added.

"Well in that case, would you…..would you like to grab a burger with me?" she asked, somewhat timidly.

Castle felt his own heart start to beat a little faster. Then, with a nervous little laugh, he said,

"When have you ever known me to turn down a burger?" he paused briefly, then quickly added,

"Sure, I'd love to join you."

"Okay good." she said.

"Good." he repeated.

"So, do you want to meet at Remys around 8:00?" Beckett asked, still feeling her rapid heartbeat.

"Sounds like a plan." he answered.

"Great, so I'll see you soon then." said Beckett.

"See you soon." he replied, then added, "Bye."

Castle slowly pressed end on his phone, as Martha walked into his office.

"Richard, I'm going to order in some Japanese food. Can I get you anything?" she asked.

"I'm sorry, what?" he asked, as he stared at his phone.

"I'm ordering some Japanese food. Would you like any?" She repeated, looking at him with a quizzical expression.

"Um, thank you, but I'll pass." he said.

He paused for a moment, still trying to wrap his head around what had just happened, then he looked up at Martha.

"I'm kind of having a hard time believing it, but Beckett just called and actually asked me to join her for dinner tonight." Castle said, unable to contain a smile.

"Oh my…a dinner date with Katherine, well, that's wonderful." Martha replied, smiling back at her son, well aware of what this meant to him.

"Well, I don't know if it's a date necessarily," Castle responded "I mean, I guess it could be? But, in any case, the fact that she wants to spend some time with me outside of work….well, that has to be a good sign, right?" he questioned.

"Darling, do yourself a favor and don't analyze." Martha quickly replied, "Just go and enjoy."

"Right." Castle said, nodding his head in agreement, then he added,

"Thank you Mother."

He stood up, kissed Martha on the cheek and excused himself, so he could go get ready.

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Beckett pressed end on her phone and stared at it for a moment, feeling a little bit panicky. Everything had happened so fast. She had acted completely impulsively and now she had plans to meet Castle for dinner, a dinner which she initiated. It's okay, it's fine, she told herself. They had shared meals before. Castle was her partner and her friend. She had just gone though an incredibly tough week, topped off with a personal breakthrough today and she didn't want to spend the evening alone in her apartment, so she called a friend. There was nothing wrong with that, plus there was no one who could put a smile on her face and make her laugh like Castle could, and after the week she just had, she really could use some laughs tonight. There was no harm in spending a few hours with him outside of work? Right? She glanced back to the copy of Heat Wave on her coffee table. No, this is good, she thought. This is how she wanted to spend her evening. It was about time she got out of her own way, and allowed herself the chance to live her life the way she wanted, the way she deserved. She put down her phone. Then she pulled her hair out of the pony tail that she had worn all day and walked into her bedroom to get ready for dinner.

Thank you so much for reading chapter 1 of Renewal!