Alone in this house again tonight
I got the TV on, the sound turned down and a bottle of wine
There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me
The way that it was and could have been surrounds me
I'll never get over you walkin' away
Sesshomaru sat on the couch at home, going through old videos of Kagome and himself. He smiled sadly as he watched them at her birthday party, and their second year together. He scowled at himself as he watched his blank face wish Kagome happy birthday, but silently commanding her that they needed to leave early, that he had work and he had no time for either of their families. He sloshed his cup of wine around as he angrily cut the movie off and leaned back on the love seat in their apartment. He buried his face in the pillows, basking in her scent which still lingered there. He sighed to himself.
He was such an idiot. Usually, he would never call himself such. Nor a fool. Nor a jack ass. Nor…well, you get the picture. But he is calling himself all of these and more now. There is not end for the insults now. He usually prided in his self control. He had too much pride period, he mused.
He had really screwed up this time. You see, they had gone out for their fifth year anniversary. He was going to propose to her and everything, he had everything fixed up just as he liked it. They were just sitting down at her favorite restaurant when his cell went off. He wouldn't have answered it if it hadn't of been his business cell. He now regrets answering it. He had an emergency, and informed her of such. They left together, him needing to go home and change.
They arrived home, and he couldn't help but notice that she was more quiet than normal. He asked her why and she had started to cry. She told him that all he ever thought about was his job. That they never spent time together anymore because he was always working. That he doesn't love her. Soon, they were in a heated argument.
I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry
He had pushed her around a little, not physically, of course, but with his attitude. He demanded that she submit, that she didn't know what she was talking about. He was seething in rage, knowing that everything she said was true. Well, almost everything. He actually loved her, he was just afraid.
Looking back now, he laughed bitterly. How stupid he was. He was angered that he was afraid. That he loved her. He thought it weakness. He scoffed at himself, taking a big gulp of the wine. Soon, he felt something warm and wet slide down his cheeks, burning his eyes. He barely noted that they were tears. He didn't care. He was too drunk, too heartbroken to care about his pride, now.
He slipped back into the thoughts of earlier. As the argument got more heated, him more enraged, he felt his eyes go red. He felt the need to do something. His vision swam red before it came back and he saw her cowering away from him, holding her cheek. He noticed that his arm was raised still from where he had…He couldn't say it. His eyes widened as he looked to Kagome. Blood oozed from the cuts across her face that his claws made. He lowered it down, too prideful to apologize. He stepped forward, reaching his hand out to her. But she had taken a step back. Then another, then another, until she was against the wall, across the room from him. Tears streamed down her face. He whimpered quietly, taking a step towards her, causing her to cry out. He immediately took a step back. His beast whimpered and whined at her and him, but he just stood there.
They had stared at each other for several minutes before she turned and walked out the door.
Would it help if I turned a sad song on
"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're gone
Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters
It's gonna hurt bad before it gets better
But I'll never get over you by hidin' this way
He smiled bitterly as the song, "All By Myself" came on. He had lost control. He had done the one thing that he had sworn in all his life to not do. He hit Kagome. He hit his one and possibly only love.
I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry
More tears streamed down his face. He was such an idiot. So stupid. He had never let his feeling show. Never cared to let his feelings show. He had never showed affection to her, he had never cuddled with her. Hell, he had never even kissed her. Pathetic, isn't it? He gulped down the rest of his glass of wine before he poured himself another, only to find the bottle empty. He muttered to himself as he glanced around him. There were empty liquor bottles every where. He shrugged. What did he have to live for now? Tears made his vision blurry and his eyes burn. He sniffled slightly, but soon, they turned into full out sobs. He had not cried in years. Not even when his mother and father died, did he cry. He had always been a heartless bastard, according to his brother. "I guess he was right…" He slurred to himself. His brother. If it weren't for his brother, he would have never met Kagome in the first place. They had been best friends in college, and he had brought her home to meet his family because they were really close friends. He had met her there, and, unknown to even himself, immediately fallen for the raven haired beauty. She had a fiery spirit and he loved it. It was so different. Hell, she was different. She didn't care about their family's status, about their money. She just loved the people for who they were.
I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry
More tears came as he realized that she had always loved him. He threw his glass at the wall, yelling at the top of his lungs. He soon passed out from the alcohol consumption. He didn't care what he looked like, he had thrown his Pride out the window. He succumbed to unconsciousness, wishing he would never wake again.
Kagome slipped into their apartment as quiet as she could. She looked around. Everything seemed fine, but it was all very, very quiet. She crept into the bathroom, bypassing the living room, and grabbed her suitcase, stuffing some clothes in it. As she went back out, she noticed that the living room was a mess. She froze as she saw all the liquor bottles, and the broken glass. Looking around, she saw the still body of Sesshomaru. Letting out a cry, she dropped her suitcase and ran to him. Turning him over, she saw how much of a mess he was. He was pale, more than normal, and had bags under his eyes. His beautiful hair was messy and his face had smudges on it. His markings had seemed to fade some, loosing some of their grandeur. She noticed that the crescent moon had receeded more. Gasping, she shook him lightly, noticing his disheveled clothes, also.
She pried his eyes open to see that his amber irises were dim and glazed, as well as dilated. She groaned and shook him more. "Sesshomaru! Sesshomaru, wake up!" She shook him a little harder and noticed for the first time the trails down his cheeks from tears. "Aww, Sesshomaru, what have you done to yourself?" She asked quietly. He finally stirred slowly and she helped him sit up.
When he opened his eyes, he had to close them back from the light in the room. Groaning, he felt someone helping him up. Figuring it had to be his friend Kouga, he sighed, "Go away Kouga. Leave me to rot. I deserve it." He only heard a gasp. He turned slowly when he noticed that it was a very feminine gasp. When his eyes focused on his companions, he couldn't believe his eyes. "K…Kagome?" He reached his hand out to touch her, as if she wasn't really there. Remembering what he did, as he saw the marks, he jerked his hands backs as if burned. He whimpered quietly as he scooted away from her, curling up into a ball, as he pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, like a child. He rocked back and forth, tears streaming down his face. He buried his face in his lap as he sobbed out.
Kagome's heart broke as she watched him. Slowly, unsurely, she scooted closer and wrapped her arms around him. "Shh…" She cooed, as she rocked him back and forth now. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and buried his face in her neck. "Shh…I'm here," She said quietly, soothingly. She noticed that his tears were starting to stop. She pulled away to look at him, but he kept his head down, his hair covering his face. She tucked it behind his Elvin ears and cupped his face with both her hands, ducking her head down slightly to see his beautiful, but broken eyes.
"Sesshomaru, what have you done to yourself?" She asked again, this time to him. His only response was a sob. "K…Kagome. I…I..L..l…love…you..so, so much…it hurts…I love you." He chanted "I love you," over and over again like a mantra, rocking back and forth, sobbing. She just sat there, stunned. A small smile brightened her face, as she pulled him back to her, laying his head in her lap. She stroked his hair as he calmed down. "Shh…" She hushed him, and soon his tears were no more. He was sober now, also. He slowly looked up, his amber eyes sharp once more, but soft as he gazed on her. She smiled down at him. "Sesshomaru…" She began, before trailing off with a sigh. She looked into his eyes. "I love you, too. I..I forgive you."
His eyes widened yet again as a small smile graced his face. He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair again. Sighing when her scent of wild flowers filled his nose, he nuzzled her neck. He suddenly brightened. Pulling back slightly, he dug in his pocket. "I…" He cleared his throat, the word came out rough and hoarse from sobbing. He continued on after a minute, pulling the box from his pocket. "I was going to give it to you…before…last night." He handed it to her. She opened it slowly and nearly fainted. He took it from her gently and placed her on the couch before kneeling before her.
"Kagome Ann Higurashi. Will you take this Taisho Sesshomaru to be your mate and husband?" Tears streamed down her face as she nodded quickly, unable to speak. He smiled gently at her and slipped the ring on her ring finger. She threw her arms around him and kissed him. He kissed her back, holding her close. After a few minutes, they pulled back. "That was…our first kiss," Kagome commented, panting. Sesshomaru smirked, his façade back in place, but softened some, just for her. "And that will not be the last," he added to her, kissing her again. She sighed and wrapped her arms around him.
"Sesshomaru?"
"Hm?"
"I love you."
"I love you too, my beloved Kagome."
Disclaimer: Me no own!
Okies, you peoples! I thank all for the wonderful reviews on 'Kagome's Dramatic Birthday!' I feel bad for not writing anything, so I did this. Please forgive any mistakes, I'm about dead on the keyboard. I pushed myself until I finished. -punches the air- GO ME! Anywho, keep look out of any more stories! I shall be writing more when I get my stupid laptop fixed, and then, there shall be lots more! Be prepared! Well, I need to go to sleep now, about to crash...Yeah...anywho, Lotsa love! TheBlackKnight87
