A/N: So this idea was inspired by Nekotalia, the cat bit from Hetalia: World Series. It's also a side story/omake thing for TSSA. Well enjoy! Or hate! Either works

WARNING: BREAKING OF THE FOURTH WALL INEVITABLE

•

"What the hell are you doing!?" I screamed. Hopeless had stuffed Ed, Al, and me into a room with no doors or windows. Basically a box.

The crazy author laughed evilly. It creeped me out and sent a chill down my spine.

"I've decided," she started, "to have some fun with you guys. You can't get out no matter what."

I narrowed my eyes. She wasn't in the room but I could hear her clearly and I knew she could see me.

"Yo! Author person!" Ed shouted. "What do you plan on doing to us?"

Hopeless sighed and reacted to the first thing he said. "I have a name you know."

'Oh yeah!' I realized. 'Because I'm the OC I'm the only one here's whose ever made contact with this insanity.'

"Whatever!" Ed remarked rudely.

I butted in. "Hopeless, just explain to us what you're doing."

"Okay!" she said her tone a fake perky. "Turn around!"

I sighed and followed orders. I raised an eyebrow at the table with potion bottles. There were three of them all labeled with Drink me.

I backed up until I hit the wall. "Like hell am I goin' ta drink that!" I said, mocking her accent.

"You'll do it because I am the author and I control everything in this story! And TSSA so you'd better follow my orders."

I stared up at the ceiling. "I'm not following any of your crazy orders! I flipped through that weird book on your desk. Once I drink that something crazy is going to happen to me."

"You mean Alice in Wonderland? And no worries, what happens is funnier than anything Louis Carol could have come up with."

I crossed my arms and shook my head.

"If you drink the potion I'll let you out of this box," she tempted.

Ed scoffed. "I'm just going to get out on my own."

He clapped his hands and hit the wall. Nothing happened.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk," Hopeless tisked. "Good luck with that Ed. You couldn't get out if you were Father."

The three of us were confused. "Huh?" we all said.

"DAMMIT!" she exclaimed. "I wasn't supposed to mention that!"

I shook my head. "This is why you're the Hopeless Alchemist."

Ed looked at me funny. "What kind of state title is that?"

"The kind given to an epic fail like her."

She cut in. "Shut up all of you! Just grab a potion and chug it!"

"But I don't have a mouth," Al commented.

"Erg!" she groaned. "Just pour it into your suit!"

"But..." he started.

"I SAID SHUT UP! NOW DRINK THE POTIONS SO THIS SIDE STORY CAN FINALLY MOVE ON WITH ITSELF!"

"Calm down," I ordered. I walked back to the table and grabbed the purple potion. I pried the cork off and wrinkled my nose.

'Bottoms up,' I thought as I brought the potion to my lips.

I gagged as I forced myself to swallow.

"That's disgusting!" I exclaimed.

Ed and Al stared at me, waiting for something to happen.

"Your stupid potion is broken." I dropped the bottle and stomped on it. It shattered into little pieces.

My heart began to pound hard and fast I groaned and doubled over.

"Myra!?" The two exclaimed.

"H-hot!" I managed to get out. My eyes grew wide and my body felt as if it were burning from the inside out.

"Are you okay?" Ed asked, genuinely concerned.

My knees gave and I fell to the floor.

"Idiot," I whispered my throat too tight to make words come out.

My clothes felt like they were growing. They were already loose but this was ridiculous.

'So I'm shrinking,' I thought. 'This shouldn't be possible but here we are.'

I was almost paralyzed. I'd gotten to the point where the pain was too much. My lungs wouldn't take in air. Slowly, it began to lessen until the point that I could move again.

I pushed my self up and found that I couldn't get off of my hands.

I moved forward and pushed my head back through the head hole of my shirt. I looked in front of me and saw four feet; Ed's boots and Al's armor. I looked up at them.

How small was I and why didn't they drink the potion?

"Hey Hopeless! Make them drink that crap too!"

The two continued to stare.

"What the hell are you guys looking at?" I questioned.

"Uh, Myra?" Al said.

"What? How much did I shrink?"

Ed responded like the annoying asshole he is. "You were short to begin with so not much, but Al's trying to say you're a cat."

I raised an eyebrow, completely ignoring the short comment. Cat? I glanced down at my hands and screamed.

Twisting and turning around all I saw was the body of a calico. My eyes grew wide and I screamed again. "I'm a goddamn cat! That shouldn't be scientifically possible!" I was suddenly aware of the fact the even my automail transformed.

I heard that bitch of an author burst into laughter. "It works perfectly! Hahaha!"

I was so mad I think my eye twitched. I crawled back into my shirt and lied down.

"You guys have to follow her lead you know. Unless you want to stay in here," Hopeless taunted.

I growled (or hissed? I don't know what cats do) at her.

"Knock it off Loken," she said in her dictator voice. "In this form you can't hurt me."

When (if?) I turned back and went back to being her imaginary friend, she was in for pain.

Somehow I passed out right there under my shirt. Damn my being a cat. Those creatures can sleep anywhere.

A/N: So how's the side story? It's not a one-shot but it is short.

Also, I don't talk to Myra in real life. It's just that whenever I'm writing Fanfiction I have a tendency to think about my characters so it's like I'm talking to them. Just a hopeless quirk of mine.