Title: let love bleed red
Rating: T (mentions of underage sex)
Characters/Pairings: Hawkfrost, Brambleclaw; Sasha/Tigerstar
Summary: Sometimes Hawkfrost wishes he could hate Brambleclaw for every little secret that he kept from him. Or, in which Brambleclaw is Hawkfrost's biological father. It stands to be said that this is a serious AU.
Authors Note: I know, I know, what is this super random and AU one-shot (that I kind of want to make into a series). But this was an idea that I had when I was a sixth grade noob - I thought that Hawkfrost was Brambleclaw's son, and that his mother was basically some random she-cat. This does not fit into the timeline or the series, but, I mean, it could kind of work. Also, I'm not sure at what age a she-cat does mature for her body to be ready for pregnancy, so we'll say at about eight moons. Title from the song of the same name by Sleeping With Sirens.
There was something about the way that Brambleclaw looked at him sometimes.
It becomes more obvious to him as he and his brother hold a closer relationship, over time; a gaze that was formerly guarded and professional slowly turned into joking and gleeful ones, his older brother becoming a lot more comfortable around him and allowing himself to open up more.
But, of course, Hawkfrost noticed; he noticed the small side glances that Brambleclaw gave him, a look too tender and caring to be just between brothers. He noticed the way that Brambleclaw immediately leaps to his defense, no matter who challenges him, in a way that's not just two brothers protecting each other. A way that holds even more love then that – a way that makes Hawkfrost's head dizzy as he tries to think what he meant to Brambleclaw, exactly.
Of course, he never knew that the answer to his questions could be something so forbiddenand strange, yet slightly comforting at the same time. He never could have guessed that he'd wish he could hate Brambleclaw for everything he was hiding from Hawkfrost.
His whole world crashes and burns in one sentence, only four common little words:
"You're not my brother."
Hawkfrost stares, icy eyes stretched wide and disbelief making his pelt prickle in shock. No one just says something like that – there has to be a reason behind it. You just don't blurt out a sentence so earth shattering like that unless you have a reason.
But Brambleclaw's reason is one that Hawkfrost never knew he could be so terrified anddisgusted to hear.
"What are you talking about?" Hawkfrost snaps, staring at his brother with a narrowed gaze. "Of course I'm your brother. I'm the son of Tigerstar and Sasha – we share the same father. You can't be that air headed, can you?"
Brambleclaw just simply stares back at him, the soft look he's giving Hawkfrost making him uncomfortable and frightened all at once. A small thought creeps into the back of his mind, a thought so dark and mysterious because it shouldn't be possible, Brambleclaw wasn'tthat much older then he was, so how could he be-
"You're related to Tigerstar," Brambleclaw meows quietly, his tone carefully neutral and patient. "Just not as close as being his son."
It wasn't possible. It couldn't be possible.
Hawkfrost just growls as Brambleclaw takes a small step toward him, his tail-tip flicking impatiently and his claws unsheathing.
"I don't have time for this, Brambleclaw," the dark tabby tells him, shaking his head in annoyance. "I should be going back to RiverClan now, anyway. I don't have the time for these lies-"
"They're not lies!" Brambleclaw snarls so suddenly, that Hawkfrost leaps back, and the switch in the other tom's gaze from harsh to apologetic that it makes him positively sick. It'snot possible. It was just one of those things that couldn't be possible – like water suddenly turning green, or a mouse walking up to him and holding up a conversation.
(But those things were things that could never happen, not even if StarClan themselves used up all of their power in order to attempt to make these things true. This…this could be re-)
It takes Brambleclaw a few calming breaths for the tabby to finally compose himself, turning sad golden eyes onto Hawkfrost.
"You're not my brother," he repeats. "You're my son."
And like that, every one of Hawkfrost's dark suspicions come to light, everything he had believed with such certainty – him being the son of a rogue and the fearsome leader of ShadowClan, his sister (wait, so what about Mothwing-) being just that, his sister, it all came down on him, the tabbies eyes widening in disbelief and anger.
"No," he growls, voice shaking. "No. You're not- you're only about eight moons older then I am, Brambleclaw – you can't be-"
"I was so young," the ThunderClan tom begins, shaking his head and lowering his gaze. "Your mother- she was too. We were both so young. I just wanted a friend; I thought that no cat in ThunderClan was there for me, that they only saw Tigerstar in me. Your mother was a kittypet, one that I met when I took a walk alone. We were just friends, at first, but then it became more then that – I know that I was too young to be doing anything like…that, but I did it anyway because I thought I was in love."
Hawkfrost feels like he's going to be sick.
"She was only eight moons old when she got pregnant," Brambleclaw tells him with a sad frown. "Because she was little, she died – you had two littermates, another tom and a she-cat, but they died along with her," His gaze clouds, and a small part of Hawkfrost wants to comfort him (but the fury inside of him outweighs that pitiful feeling). "I was desperate – convinced that ThunderClan would hate me because of what I'd done. That they'd refuse you.
"I brought you to Tigerstar; he took you to Sasha, and you were raised to believe that Mothwing and Tadpole were your siblings." He finishes, gulping and watching Hawkfrost carefully.
I don't believe it, he thinks with a curl of his lip. I'm not- he can't be my father. Brambleclaw's my brother…Mothwing is my sister, and Tadpole was my brother. He will never be my father – it's not possible!
When he sees Brambleclaw attempting to take another step toward him, he realizes with anger that he's been whimpering (who does that? Not him – he's never whimpered or sobbed or blubbered or anything like that!).
"I wanted you," Brambleclaw tells him, his voice hard and serious. "Even if you don't believe me when I tell you I'm your father, just- you need to know that I wanted you. I wanted to keep you, Hawkfrost, but I couldn't-"
Hawkfrost cuts him off with a shake of his head, frowning and pushing past the warrior, heading up the slope and toward his own territory. He can hear a small call of his name; but he couldn't bear to look back and see Brambleclaw staring after him, grief and pain in his gaze-
So he didn't.