fire in her veins

He's met them all. They've been sweet, bubbly, sassy, and preppy, but none of them match her fire. Ash has so many friends, all of them different, but Gary keeps coming back to the start. He doesn't know why they always leave, but they go willingly and he remembers Ash describing how the first was dragged, kicking and screaming.

He's been with plenty of girls. None of them rival what Ash can conjure up, and still none come near the realm that she exists in. They're always pretty, but never radiant. They're spunky, but not intimidating. She's so unique and with every girl he's tried, he never realised that he was simply trying to recreate the original.

Ash stays away, traveling to new places and forging new friendships. Gary comes home, settling into familiar and rekindling older bonds. He and Tracey get drinks often, and he even sees people like Ritchie or Brock. He visits with his grandfather, who hasn't kicked it yet and doesn't have plans to. Gary even drops in on Ash's mother, being her son when the real deal is away and out of touch.

Ash's Pokémon know him too. He's not Ash, but he cares and he's there. Bulbasaur was amongst the first, and they all came around after that. Except for the Taurus; no one can tame those Taurus. Gary spends time with his own Pokémon too and furthers his studies.

He thinks about going back to Sinnoh to visit with Professor Rowan again. Fossils really are his expertise and Gary is fascinated. For a while, he entertains the possibility seriously. He fell asleep in front of a monitor with a map of Sinnoh on it and the elder Oak saw it. The next thing Gary knew, he was on a plane to Sinnoh.

The work was good and the change of scenery was welcome. In his second month of work, he visited the city to pick up a delivery and saw a poster with a familiar face. The fashion show was painful, but he reunites with the bubbly one.

She recognizes him, and he's not surprised. Dawn greets him in an Ash-like fashion and again, Gary isn't surprised. However, he is surprised when Dawn introduces him to tall, dark, and brooding. It's an interesting meeting of Ash's rivals, if Gary can even be considered a rival anymore. Gary can tell by the awkward air that Dawn and Paul are testing the waters and that his appearance only makes it awkward because now they're all thinking of Ash.

He doesn't stay in Sinnoh. The work was good, but he's at the point that it can be conducted from home. Home is a welcome sight. He gets a letter from a friend and thinks of childhood. His friend is hiding on a mountain, but she invites him and Ash up whenever they please. It's ironic. The invitation is open, but the mountain is suicide to climb if not well prepared. Gary writes back, but makes no plans to visit.

His work eventually takes him north of Pallet Town, and then to the east. He studies the Clefairy and Cleffa in Mt. Moon and travels between Cerulean and Pewter regularly. Evolution and fossils go hand in hand and the Moon stones littering the cave are anomalies worth understanding.

One late afternoon brings him to Cerulean and he has an open schedule. A mindless wander brings him to her door and a smile twitches his lips. It's been a while since he's seen Ash, even talked to him, but longer since he's seen her. His knock is short and concise; two short raps and nothing more.

She answers it with slight trepidation, keeping a leg lodged behind the door and opening it only a small crack. He should be surprised at her appearance, but he isn't. Her hair is the same: choppy, short, pulled into a side ponytail, and made of fire. Her features are still striking, but they've softened and matured into those of a woman instead of a child. She's a little shorter than he remembers, but maybe that's simply because he's taller.

Her eyes grow wide and owlish as she recognises him. The door doesn't budge, but her anxiety visibly drains away and she's the one staring at him and he doesn't blame her. Gary works hard; he's fit and he knows he's good-looking. He's always been charming, boyishly so, but now his charisma is different and she's definitely not immune. His grin is the same and it disarms her last defences.

"I wasn't expecting to see you," she says finally.

He smirks and shrugs casually. "I was in the area." His reply is vague and she frowns. He gives her a more serious look, but only slightly. "I figure," he explains, "that if Ash isn't visiting you, someone from Pallet might as well."

The door creaks open and she puts a hand on her hip, giving him a critical once-over. "Come in," she invites flatly.

He accepts the somewhat sarcastic invitation and smiles at her snide side; it's the same as always. Her home is clean, but lived in and small. He wasn't expecting much considering it's attached to the gym and he knows the real money is pumped in there. The Cerulean City Gym is known for its state of the art facilities and notoriously tough Gym Leader.

She leads him down a hallway towards what he assumes is the kitchen. Though it feels a little invasive, he can't help but notice the walls: they're covered in photos. There are many shots of her and Ash when they're young. Brock and Tracey make a lot of appearances too. There are some of her sisters, some of the whole family, and some of just Ash and company-without her.

He's surprised to see numerous photos of her with the sweet, bubbly, sassy, and preppy girls. To his amusement, it appears Ash might be leaving a string of broken hearts. She appears to know the sweet girl the best as their photos start the youngest and continue to the most recent age.

As far as clutter goes, the kitchen is the messiest, but it's still nothing compared to his office. PIA forms cover one counter completely and Gary frowns. The PIA is ridiculous and he feels bad she has to deal with them at all. She seems to notice him looking and so she sweeps them all into a pile at one end of the counter. She gestures to the chairs and he sits.

She pulls out the wooden chair across from him and studies him. Her green eyes are sharp like knives and they cut straight through to his insides. "Why are you here Gary?" she asks, sounding almost accusatory.

"There's no need to get angry," he placates. "I'm here because I've been working in Mt. Moon for almost a month and I had a free day to spend in Cerulean. I wanted to see a familiar face when I was in town."

She softens, again, and finally smiles. "Well, it's good to see you," she offers.

It's the closest thing to an apology that he'll be getting, and he takes it without argument.

"Coffee?" she asks, pulling two mugs out of her cupboard.

He raises an eyebrow. "It's four in the afternoon," he remarks.

She shrugs. "I've never been one to believe in time schedules," she admits.

He knows exactly where that belief came from. Gary laughs. "Alright, coffee it is."

She pours him a cup and it nearly burns his hands. The ceramic is chipped from years of use and the drink is so hot it scorches his tongue. It's strong; stronger than he'd usually brew it and he raises an eyebrow at her.

"I never took you for a scalding, over-powering coffee person," he remarks. Ironically, he then realizes that it makes perfect sense. She practically lived with Ash for years and he'd probably need excessive amounts of strong, overpowering coffee to keep up with Ash's overpowering personality.

She rolls her eyes and takes a short sip from her own mug. Their banter continues; short jabs and brisk conversations. Neither brings up Ash and Gary's perfectly okay with that. They talk about his work and her gym and Gary eyes the pile of PIA reports with limited subtlety. She doesn't bring it up.

Eventually it's time for him to leave. There is no formal handshake and no friendly hug goodbye, but he doesn't expect one. They're friends through friends and he doesn't expect to be treated like Ash. A respectful tip of his head is enough and heads on his way to his hotel.

He drops in on her the next time he visits and this time she doesn't say anything; she opens the door and he follows her into the kitchen. The mug is placed on the counter in front of him and he's cautious of the steaming liquid this time.

Her hair is down and tucked behind her ears. It's a rarity, he remembers; she insistently wore it up every day of their childhood. She fiddles with a strand of it and doesn't drink any coffee herself, but he can see a drained cup behind her.

"Have you been expecting me?" he jokes and takes a whiff of the coffee. It's just as strong as he expects.

She purses her lips and shrugs. "I've been talking to Brock. He said you were headed out this way for work again, and since you dropped by last time, I figured you'd stop by again," she explains.

Gary nods and takes a long sip. "How's the gym?" he asks. He figures that they should talk about her work since they talked about his before.

Her eyes light up and she starts describing the one interesting battle she'd had recently. It was against a girl their age with chestnut hair and green eyes that shone like emeralds. Apparently, her Venusaur was vicious and only just came out on top.

This story, this battle style, is familiar for too many reasons. The girl, she battled like Ash-passionate and tough-but she was also very different from Ash-relying on strategy and precision over luck. But that is the way he remembers her, with her sharp green eyes and taunting invitations to climb the mountain he now simply calls hers.

Had she not left him at the bottom, perhaps he could have loved her, but that doesn't change the fact she is still hiding from him, eight years later. And for once, he doesn't feel the need to search for her, even a little, and it's a relief.

"You know her," she says after a minute of silence passes. Her green eyes are fixed on his place and they're so similar but so different.

"Yes, and no," he corrects. "I knew her when we were children," he says, taking another sip of coffee.

"Okay," she replies. She doesn't push him and Gary is thankful. He knows that it isn't her style; she's a personal person too so if she didn't bug you, then you shouldn't bug her either.

Still, all good relationships are built on trust. He tells her anyways. "Her name is Leaf Greene. She was also from Pallet Town; she was the bridge between Ash and I as a kid. However, when we turned 10, we all set out. Ash and I went for the League and she just trained." He pauses, tracing a nail along a line on the countertop. "She trained and we kept in touch until one day, she just vanished. The next thing I heard, she had taken refuge on Mount Silver. She has hardly come down in years," he explains.

She blinks. While Leaf's eyes were like the crisp leaves in the forest, hers reflect the colour of the ocean near the surface where the sunlight hits it. "That's," she mumbles, searching for the correct word, "different," she settles.

Gary just shrugs. "To each their own."

She just smiles. "It appears we share a certain outlook Mr. Oak," she points out.

He takes another sip of his coffee. "A satirical and bitter view?" he asks sarcastically.

This time, she laughs and he manages to crack a smile of his own.

The next time, it's her who seeks out him. He's working in the mountain again, studying rock samples for traces of fossils, when she arrives. She's dressed casually and her hair is pulled out of her face. The lighting of the cave casts odd shadows across her face, but she's still beautiful. She has two travel mugs in hand and Gary doesn't need his magnifying glass to know that it's coffee.

His tools find their way back into the kit and he finds himself just sitting in a cave with her, trading stories. She's had a few interesting battles and he's been to see a few interesting people. She asks about his work and he finally gets the chance to geek out a little.

She's definitely more than a little lost as he explains about the chemical composition of rocks containing fossils, but she hears him out anyways. It's a surprise; with her personality, he figures she would have stopped him when he lost her. Then, he realizes, it's just another side affect of knowing Ash: knowing when to let him talk and when to shut him up.

They end their impromptu visit with a hike. Gary takes her on some of the lesser-known trails through Mt. Moon and is pleased by the result. She keeps up with him easily and is as impressed by the views of the massive mountain chambers as he is. They take photos and he gets a really nice candid shot of her just looking down over a rock edge.

This time, when she leaves, they set plans. He'll be back in Cerulean in two weeks, and they're going to get dinner. He's looking forward to it.

Their next outing involves a much different setting. The dress is more formal, and for the first time, there's no overwhelmingly bitter coffee involved. The restaurant in Cerulean is one of her favourites. It's a hidden gem, tucked away in the far corner of the city and the place is nearly empty when they arrive.

She's treated like a queen, for being a regular customer and the gym leader of their city. He's treated like a stranger, but she translates their unfriendliness to them simply not knowing him. It's an answer he accepts, but mostly only because it comes from her.

Their conversations finally stray from work. They talk about Brock and Professor Oak and Gary tentatively brings up Delia, but Misty steers away from it. She then brings up Leaf and Gary talks about his childhood. He can't miss how her shoulders tense whenever he even mentions Ash, so he starts to crop the trainer out of the stories.

In return, he finds out more about her. She talks about her sisters, their irritating habits and the few times they've been nice, and about herself. She talks about favourite colours, Pokémon, places, food. He learns she hates peppers and carrots and bugs, but he knew the last one already; Ash told him.

This evening ends with them sharing the couch at her place, watching a horror movie that's so fake it's funny. They take turns running sarcastic commentary and they place bets on which characters will die first. The couch isn't particularly large, so even once and awhile, her leg will brush against his, and he becomes hyperaware, but she doesn't react.

The next time, she asks where he's staying.

"I'm at the Ridgefield Hotel just down the street from the PokéCentre. It's not super expensive, but it's nice enough," he explains.

"Gary," she sighs, "you should stay here. I have an extra bed and I don't charge for room or food."

He holds up his hands. "I don't want to impose."

She levels a firm glare at him. "And who would you be imposing on? Me? I work most days so it's not like you'd be in my way. My other guests? They're non-existent so don't worry."

He raises an eyebrow at her. "And you're sure you could put up me for the entirety of one of my visits? Usually, we just manage bits and spurts."

She slugs him in the shoulder and he's surprised because it actually hurt. "Come on, I can handle it. You can't be any worse than…" She cuts off abruptly, avoiding the name. "Anyone else I know," she recovers after a second.

Gary watches her expression. Her lips are pressed into a line and her eyes are stormy. She misses him; that much is still very evident. He pats her arm, trying to relieve her. "I'll make sure not to make a hotel reservation next time."

That's the end of that discussion.

It's almost a year after his visits began when she gets the invite to the gala. It's an annual thing for all the Gym Leaders and members of the Pokémon League. His grandfather usually receives an invite, and occasionally Gary has tagged along, but the party scene was never his place, as much as he might pretend it is.

He's staying with her in Cerulean when the letter arrives. He's even the one who picks up the thick envelope from the mailbox and passes it to her over lunch one day. She sees it and a scowl instantly covers her pretty features. She leaves it unopened on the table for a day before he's finally curious enough to ask.

"Is that for the League Gala?"

She looks up from her PIA paperwork. They're sitting at opposite ends of the table doing their respective work, but his eyes are fixed on the letter. "Yes," she admits. "I've always hated the thing. It's too uptight and I hate having to pretend I like my coworkers. It was more tolerable when Brock was there, but since Forrest took over, he's too nice for his own good. I have no one to complain about."

"You know," he muses. "I'm sure I could tag along with my grandfather, and you could complain to me," he suggests.

She arches a brow. "You'd suffer through this for me?"

He shrugs. "Might as well. I've got nothing better to do with my time besides work, and even that gets tiring eventually."

She smiles and turns back to her paperwork. "If you can figure out how to get yourself invited, I'd appreciate your company."

One phone call later and Gary's secured himself his grandfather's invitation. The elder Oak is getting too old for these kinds of things anyways.

Three weeks later and he's fitted in his best suit: black jacket and pants with a pressed white shirt and a silver tie. If one looks close enough, they would be able to spot the thinly dispersed threads of blue and green through the tie, but the colour is very faint and only noticeable if you're looking for it. His grandfather actually thanks him for taking the invitation off his hands and Gary forces himself to smile and swallow the embarrassment at the real reason he took the party invite.

He drives to Viridian City and to the Indigo Plateau shortly afterwards. He explains to the ushers that his grandfather bestowed the invitation on him and they let him in without complaint. Inside, he's immediately swept into the swing of the party. It's high end and fancy and Gary does admit, the Plateau looks classy and wonderful. The Johto and Kanto Gym Leaders and Elite Four and other League Associates are all dressed to the nine and Gary doesn't feel out of place in his dress clothes anymore.

Some of the women look particularly pretty, Whitney and Erika for example, but he already knows whom his eye is searching for. He doesn't see her right away so he heads to the refreshments table as an escape before he can be dragged into a conversation. Forrest waves eagerly to him when he catches the briefest glimpse and Gary gives him a respectful head nod in return.

She doesn't keep him waiting long. It's perhaps two or three minutes after he arrives that the doors swing open and she appears. Her dress is long, as is appropriate for the occasion, and to his surprise, it's ivory. The soft colour makes her cream skin look even softer but it makes her red hair draw all the attention. She has filled in the length with extensions and it pours over her open back like a wave of fire. She looks absolutely radiant and he wastes no time in approaching her.

She sees him when he's several feet away and her lips curl up. She's wearing more make-up than usual and she still looks beautiful to him. "Mister Oak, don't you look sharp," she greets slyly.

He extends a hand to her and her slim fingers wind in between his own fingers. He brings it up to his lips and kisses the back of her hand, never breaking eye contact. She doesn't flush, but she looks impressed nonetheless. From there, he escorts her away from the doors, never releasing her hand for a second.

"I should definitely say the same to you, but even those words wouldn't do you justice," he compliments.

She smiles again, but this time he can see there's something in her eye that doesn't look 100 percent happy. The weight of the observation presses against his stomach, but he elects to ignore it. There are people greeting her and him and now that he's close enough, he notices the green threads running through her dress and the flash of green silk that lines the inside of it.

He leans in a little closer to whisper over the crowd, "Looks like we had a thought train in common."

She turns to him, a strand of red hair brushing his cheek, and takes in his tie. "It's one of my favourite colours," she reminds. She smirks at him and walks away into the crowd.

He watches her go, a real smile appearing on his face. "And it's become one of mine," he replies softly.

The rest of the party is relatively uneventful. Gary carries pleasant conversations with plenty of acquaintances and dances with enough girls that he nearly forgets their names, but it all comes back to her. They stand on the edge of the dance floor and run a satirical commentary on the rest of the event and he manages to coerce her into a few dances. He notices that Forrest gets one, but the rest of the men who ask are rejected.

He wonders her reasoning. He knows she's a very personal person who prefers to get to know people, but her rejecting a simple dance seems to implicate much more than just that. He wonders if it's because of someone in particular. She's been on edge all evening, as hard as she tried to hide it, and he thinks it's because she's waiting on someone.

But she keeps coming back to him too.

It's past midnight by the time the party is over and she tells Gary that she's staying at a Hotel in Viridian as paid for by the League. She offers him the extra bed since she's somehow ended up in a two-bed room by herself so that he doesn't have to disturb his grandfather back in Pallet Town. He accepts gratefully.

Neither of them head to sleep right away. They don't even really unwind from the party fully as Gary just removes his jacket, rolls up his sleeves and loosens his tie. She changes into shorts and a big t-shirt, but doesn't change her hair back or remove her make-up yet. They sit in chairs by the window, looking out over Viridian in silence for a while.

There's a cracked bottle of wine on the table between them and they're both just a little tipsy.

There are short spurts of conversation, but nothing that lasts longer than a minute. Finally, at nearly two in the morning, she makes the decision to turn in. She's seated on the edge of one bed, looking down at her hands and he sits next to her. She's been off all night, and it hasn't slipped past his observations.

She turns and looks him dead in the eyes and he gets lost in her oceans. In the next minute, he dips his head down towards hers and her chin lifts just the tiniest fraction. Their lips don't meet, but his breath falls across her face softly. Their noses are barely not touching, but he still can't look away from her eyes. She's hesitating.

He's kissed plenty of girls before and he's seen plenty of emotions in their eyes before the first kiss. Often it's confusion or fear or lust and sometimes happiness, but she's different. Her green irises are cloudy and he tries to place it as fear. Perhaps she's like him-unwilling to ruin their good friendship. But, as he hesitates a moment longer he realises.

It's not fear; it's guilt.

He pulls away sharply and she turns in on herself, looking away from him quickly.

"Gary," she breathes.

He feels ice spread through him to his toes. "It's him isn't it?"

She doesn't reply-can't-for a moment, but then her curls bounce as she nods slowly. He runs a hand through his hair and wonders how he was so blind. Now all his analyses of her behaviour makes sense. She was protective of her heart but willing to make friends. She is waiting for someone, it just isn't him.

"Can't you see he's not coming back?" he asks fiercely. There's a fire lit ablaze in his chest now and he's furious; of course, Ash can take this away too even though he's not even here.

Her head snaps towards him and her eyes darken with fury. "You think I don't know that?" she snaps. "I've been trying for years, years, to get this feeling to go away. It doesn't work like that. You don't understand what that feels like!"

He exhales sharply. "Don't," he presses.

"He abandoned me, and I'm still in love with him!" she bursts, her hands flying to her temples in her anger.

"He abandoned me first!" Gary snarls. She quiets, watching him. "I grew up with Ash the Golden Boy Ketchum. He had everything: a loving mom, great friends, a unique partner, an unbreakable spirit and to top it off, a title worth a million dollars-The Chosen One. He grew into a trainer, and as much as I claimed I was ahead, I was really chasing the dust he left me in. Because I got stronger, but he got better. Everything I worked for in years of training, fell into his lap perfectly. Those dreams of becoming Champion were ours originally, but I saw that he was pulling away from me too fast, so I stepped back. I was done trying to compete with Ash Ketchum.

"But then there was you. I remembered you, the first of his companions and his most loyal and treasured alongside Brock. You with your hair like fire and your eyes like the endless oceans. Back then; you were just Ash's friend. It was a foreign concept to me that anything Ash had I could also share, so I never said anything. But then we grew up and everyone I met was compared to you, to Ash. And they were never good enough, because they weren't you! And I came back because he wouldn't and I thought that maybe now I'd have a chance, but I was clearly mistaken."

"Gary, you can't hate him. Hate me, despise me, scream at me, but don't ever hate him. He's better than us, all of us, and maybe he can't see that, but we can. And I'm sorry, I'm sorry for leading you on or making you believe that we were a possibility, because since I was twelve, there's been no one but Ash. And maybe, if I set him aside long enough, we could be a possibility, but," she trails off, thoughts unravelling.

"You see him in me, and that's what you like about me. You're not distinguishing between Ash and me, so you can't put him aside to love me." His voice is barely audible. He's sharp and bitter.

"I'm sorry, Gary," she pleads.

He stands from the bed, the mattress creaking due to his loss of weight. "I should go home. Grandpa will be wondering where I got too." He grabs his jacket on the way to the door and neither point out the glaring fact that his grandfather will be long asleep. His hand is reaching for the doorknob, when she calls after him.

"I'm sorry." She's beginning to sound like a broken record and his heart aches.

He casts her one last look-the girl with the eyes like oceans and hair like fire with a spirit that's unpriceable. She's still the girl he loves, but there's no point in loving her if she could never love him back. In his dreams, he may call out for her, but she'll only ever call out for Ash.

"I'm sorry too, Misty."

Author's Note: More angst! I'm sorry...

This was very Egoshipping oriented, but it was meant to highlight more Pokéshipping. I guess if you see it, it's also kind of Palletshipping? Anyways, angst none the less there at the end.