Ok...So, I forget who said it, but in one of my reviews, someone said "Paul's always a lawyer. Someone should make him a stripper or something!"

So...uh, I'm going to. If that's alright.

Warning: Characters are slightly OOC! This is the result of far too much caffine and no boyfriend around because he's at work...Also because boredom sunk in around 10:30 last night...

Summary: Suze and CeeCee go to a male strip club to celebrate Cee's 18th birthday. Suze has already turned 18, obviously. They're about to discover a little secret about Paul...

Rating: R, to be safe.

This is a one-shot. I hope people don't kill me...

Ok...And now, the story: The Secret Life Of Paul Slater

Suze's POV:

"Oh My God." I said, as Cee and I stood outside in line, waiting to get into The Queen's Men, a strip club for us ladies, located about an hour outside of Carmel-By-The-Sea. CeeCee was turning 18, and when asked how she wanted to spend the evening, the somewhat-prude journalist-in-training replied with, "The Queen's Men."

I gasped. Sure, I'd heard of the place, but Cee? Really? Maybe Cee had a wild side no one knew of.

We got in a few minutes later, and sat down at a small table next to the stage area. The guy closest to us was about 19 or 20, with huge brown eyes, curly Ryan-Phillipe blonde hair, swimmer's muscles, dressed (not for long...) in a firemen's get up. "Awwwwwwww YEAH!" Cee squealed as he came closer, his very well defined six-pack shaking in time to the music as he stripped off the straps to his fireman's outfit.

I looked at her, not expecting any of it. I added my own wolf whistle and ordered a virgin drink from the sexy rock-star waiter. "So, Cee, having fun?"

"Damn straight." She giggled, giving her order of a virgin pina colada to the waiter. "It's nice to have a night away from Adam and Jesse."

Yes, since that day in the graveyard 2 years ago (almost exactly two years ago, come to think of it) Jesse and I have been dating. He also became alive shortly after our kiss in front of his headstone. At homecoming, Adam and CeeCee realized how perfect they were for each other, and the four of us have been double-dating since then. We settled into a little girl-talk before the announcer cut us off.

"Ladies, here for his last performance," at this, the regulars let out a loud, "Aww!!!!", to which the DJ continued with, "I know, it's sad, but there's no changing the mind of Mr...Rico Suave!"

My head snapped up at the spotlight that had appeared. No, I was not expecting Jesse to come popping out. But the mention of Rico Suave made me remember a certain shifter who has been attempting to get in my pants every chance he got. Which, thankfully, was only at school where Jesse could beat his ass. I stared at the curtain, CeeCee and I's jaws dropping identically as we saw the Sex God of Carmel appear, dressed in an outfit similar to what Jesse wore for 150 years.

You would have recognized him anywhere. The curly dark hair, the big blue eyes, the rock hard abs, and the cocky swagger were all trademarks of a Slater. More specifically, Paul Slater.

Our eyes got wide as he came closer towards us, thankfully not seeing us under the bright lights. His black pants were tighter than Jesse's had been and the shirt was cut lower to show off his chisled stomach. CeeCee and I looked at each other, each of our jaws now firmly back in place and both of us holding back fits of laughter.

We weren't laughing- or at least, Cee wasn't- when the low-cut billowly white top came sailing into the audience and landing right on Cee. She immediately snatched it up and stuffed it into her purse as many girls dove at her for a piece. We watched as Paul started to dance around one of the poles, swinging and kicking off the cowboy boots he'd worn. Thankfully, those did not have spurs and were tossed to the other side of the audience.

The only thing left were Paul's spray on pants. CeeCee and I inched forward as Paul came to our side of the stage, each of us wearing a huge grin. I crossed my legs and waggled my fingers as Paul's big blue eyes made contact, first with Cee's violet ones and then with my emeralds.

The look on his face went from one of ecstacy to pure horror in about two seconds flat as he recognized us. Our smiles grew as Paul realized that the show had to go on- and that the show included his too-tight trousers to come off.

Now, yes, I had a boyfriend whom I loved more than anything in the world. However, I also wanted to see why Paul was the sex god of Carmel-By-The-Sea.

Paul's look of horror quickly passed as he moved his hips in slow, definite circles, drawing every eye to his...ehm, area. He smirked at me, then jumped down- the spotlight following him- and proceeded to give CeeCee and I lap dances.

AND OH MY GOD...It was one of the weirdest things I've ever had done to me! Paul leaned over when he was on my lap and whispered in my ear, "See what you missed out on, Suze?"

Before I could respond, he was back up on the stage- TROUSERLESS- and I was sitting in shock as Paul's ass was in front of my face and his trousers were in my hands. It was a very nice ass, but still...

And then, the only warning for what was about to happen being the enormous applause from pleased audience members, he turned and faced us.

CeeCee and I raced out of there, red faced, grateful that school was out and we were freshman in college because that meant that we wouldn't see Paul in school on Mondy. I got into the driver's seat of my little black Ford Focus and rested my head on the steering wheel as fits of laughter exploded from both our mouths.

"He is DEFINITELY qualified for his title." I said after I'd calmed down a bit, causing CeeCee to go into convulsions again.

Both of us learned something very important that night. The Secret Life Of Paul Slater.