AN: Here's a little one shot song-fic I wrote when I was feeling angsty. It's X-Men Evolution set a few years in the future…about 8 years maybe, that doesn't matter. I changed some minor things for the story, but they are negligible. So here ya go, I hope you all enjoy! Please review, I might continue with an epilogue or perhaps an entire fic if I get a good reception, reviews are very motivating!
Disclaimer: The song is "Dance With My Father Again" by Luther Van Dross, I don't own it in ANY form, and I'm not making money from it either. I also don't own any of the characters, only the plot.
Oh yea, to those of you who thought I was updating Honor and Consequences, I'm really sorry, but you'll have to wait until Monday for that update because I'm currently away from my computer where I have that chapter saved, apologies again!
Song lyrics~*~Time~*~ (AN: To make it easy to follow, each time span is marked as the difference from the last one…ie; 4 days ago…2 days later…2 days after that, or today)
Dance With My FatherBy: The Sphinx Minx
~*~Present~*~
Little Luke followed his mother into the church; she was easy to follow, Luke never got lost. His Momma always stood tall and straight, proud. And he could always see her white streaks when she wore her hair back. And even if he couldn't see his Momma, he could always hear her; she sounded different from the rest of the Momma's in the shops. Little Luke never got lost when he was out with his Momma. He was seven years old….well six and three quarters, he'd be seven soon, and he'd never gotten lost once! Unlike Nadia and Rosie. They were always getting lost in shops. Once, Aunt 'RoRo got so upset when she couldn't find her Rosie that Uncle Logan couldn't focus enough to try and sniff her out! They ended up asking Nadia's dad to help, so he bamfed all over the mall. He eventually found her in the smelly part of Macy's. Luke wrinkled his nose. Why did girls wear that smelly water anyway?
"Luke? Come on sugah" Luke was pulled from his daydream by his mothers call. As
they walked up the aisle, he saw Nadia sitting between her Mom and Dad. Her Dad
wasn't blue today, but her Mom looked the same…even if she wasn't walking
through walls like she usually was. He winked at Nadia and she giggled, He had
learned a few days ago how to wink with one eye and it always made people
laugh. Before, he used to cheat by brushing his floppy hair over one eye and
closing them both. He wanted people to think the hidden eye was open and that
he was winking. But he tripped sometimes when he did that, so he didn't think
people believed him. He'd started learning card tricks too, but that made people
sad, so he stopped and decided winking was his next goal.
"Hey Young Gumbo" Someone ruffled Luke's hair. He scowled as he looked up, he hated that. Uncle Logan laughed and looked at Momma.
"You alright darlin'?"
"Yea sugah, thanks. Ah just can't believe it'd been two years, ah don't think Luke understands why we're all here."
"he'll understand soon enough darlin' n he'll be proud." Momma's eyes got watery so Luke looked away. He hated it when Momma cried. Luckily this time she didn't. Instead she gave Uncle Logan a hug and ushered Like into the pew. She lowered the cushion for your knees and gave Luke a look when he tried to kneel on it while keeping his bottom on the seat. Momma always knelt properly. So Luke obeyed. He clasped his hands together and shut his eyes to pray. He said hi to God first, then Jesus, then the Holy Spirit. He took a deep breath and started to pray to his Dad.
Back when I was a child before life removed all the innocence
My father would lift me high and dance with my mother and me and then
Spin me around til I fell asleep
Then up the stairs he would carry meAnd I knew for sure I was loved
Hey Dad, did you see that? I can wink now! I practiced for aaaaages, but I got it! How are t'ings in heaven? Tell ev'ryone I said hi, Grandpop, Uncle Piotr, Aunt Besty, n ev'ryone else.
Rogue discreetly wiped away her tears with her thumbs and found herself wishing she had worn her hair down instead of the French twist she'd opted for. She would have liked to hide her face behind the curtain of soft brown hair, but the days of hiding were gone. She was responsible for someone other than herself now. Rogue moved her head slightly to the right and looked down at Luke, her son, her one and only child. Fathered by the only love of her life. Luke sensed her gaze and opened his eyes to look up at her. She reached down and brushed his hair out of his eyes. He winked up at her as he pulled away. She couldn't help but grin. Cheeky Devil
Luke closed his eyes again and continued his prayer.
Momma really misses you. I accidentally wore your old coat the other day and she totally freaked…Nadia says that a lot…totally freaked. Anyway yea, she got mad, but Aunt Jean told me not to worry, that Momma was just sad. Then I felt bad so I went over to her and told her I loved her. She said she loved me too, but I knew that. Then I said that you loved both of us but then she got sad again! Girls are really confusing Dad, I wish you were here to help. Why was she sad? I know you love us, doesn't she know? I miss you too Dad. Momma has no one to dance with at the parties. I promise when I'm big enough to dance with girls, I'll dance with Momma. Promise. I'm gon' be a good dancer too, Momma says so, cuz you taught me! 'Member how we used to dance around the kitchen? I was a kid then, but I still remember. Oh but when I dance with Momma, I won't fall asleep like I used to.
If I could get another chance, another walk, another dance with himI'd play a song that would never ever end
Rogue looked at her sons face, all screwed up with concentration and couldn't help but wonder what was going on in his head. She glanced behind her at her friends. And their families. Kurt and Kitty with Nadia. Logan and Ororo with Rosie. Jean and Scott, the good naturedly dubbed "baby making machines" were trying to keep their crowd of Amy, Michelle, Shawn, and little Alexandria quiet. Bishop, Sam, Amara, and others were scattered in the church, all present to pay their respects. Way in the back, Rogue saw a woman who she didn't recognize, but couldn't help feeling as though she should.
Of course.
Mystique.
The woman that came knocking on Rogue's door exactly two years and two weeks previous. But she wasn't looking for Rogue that time.
How I'd love love love
To dance with my father again
~*~2 years and 2 weeks previous~*~
"Rogue, I need to speak to Gambit."
"You're not welcome h-"
"Chere, who's at de d-"
"Gambit, I need to speak to you…is that…is this Lucas?"
Remy looked at Rogue as he held his sleeping son in his arms. Rogue suddenly felt sick. "You're not wanted here Mystique. Leave us be!"
The blue skinned mutant tore her eyes from her lost grandson and became all business again. "Gambit, we need your help."
How I'd love love love
To dance with my father again
"Mystique, we'll talk in a minute, but we need't put Luke down fo' de night. Wait in the sitting room."
As soon as her foster mother was out of sight, Rogue turned to Remy, eyes wide. "Remy-"
"Ungh…Momma?"
"It's ok sugah, come on, Momma'll bring ya to bed."
When I and my mother would disagreeTo get my way I would run from her to him
He'd make me laugh just to comfort me
Then finally make me do just what my mother said
Later that night when I fell asleep
He left a dollar under my sheet
"Momma, I not tired!"
Rogue looked disbelievingly at her son. This wasn't the time for a temper tantrum.
"hey hey Luke, tell ya what…you don' hafta sleep, jus wait in your bed fo' us! Dat a good deal?"
Luke hesitated. He didn't have to sleep? Just wait in his bed? Seemed O.K.
Never dreamed he would be gone from meIf I could steal one final glance, one final step, one final dance with him
Rogue carried the sleepy Luke up the carpeted stairs, footsteps falling silently. He was aware of voices in the other room, but was too drowsy to decipher who the second one was. He easily recognized the first. Daddy. Lucas turned his head from its comfortable spot on Rogue's shoulder to look at his father. As Rogue ascended the stair, Luke's green eyes with a red glint met his fathers dark, warm ones. Remy Le Beau temporarily stopped listening to Mystique in the fire lit room as he watched his wife carry his son up and out of sight. He met his son's eyes and got a nauseous feeling in his stomach. He wanted to shout but couldn't find his voice. So he winked at Luke, who grinned and buried his face in Rogue's hair before ascending out of sight.
I'd play a song that would never ever end
Cause I'd love love love
To dance with my father again.
Gambit turned to Mystique, "What d'you need me t'do?"
"It's Magneto…he's…he's lost his mind. Completely unbalanced by his last defeat at Xavier's hands."
"But dat was years ago." Rogue returned to the room and Remy signalled for her to join him on the couch by the ablaze fire. They held each other's gaze as Rogue crossed the room. Remy had been half sitting, half lounging across the couch, so Rogue sat on the next cushion and put her head back, onto his chest. She could hear his heart beat. Remy continued speaking. "but dat was years ago, why de sudden insanity?"
Mystique paused before speaking again, "That is partially my fault, It took us all a long time to confirm our fears, but we know for sure know. He's too dangerous and too imbalanced to…we have to finish this once and for all."
"Let me go! Ah've complete control over mah powers now, ah can be one of the most powerful offensive hitters you have. Ah still have most of the X-Men's powers stored!"
Gambit was about to protest, but Mystique spoke first.
"Xavier made it clear that only one parent from a family can take part in this mission."
"So let me be the one!"
"Rogue, part of Magneto's madness is that he gets disorientated about the time,
He thinks he's friends with Xavier one minute, then he thinks he still has the
Acolytes, but it's when he remembers that it's the most frightening. His rage.
It's describable."
Rogue was pleading now, pleading for the love of her life. "So?! I can handle whatever Magneto can possibly throw at me, no matter what year he thinks it is!" She was standing now, nearly shouting at Mystique. Remy ran his hand through his hair. He reached out and gently pulled Rogue back onto the couch again. He knew what was coming.
"How long do de disorientations last?"
"They've been growing longer, he could think it's a certain year for weeks before remembering."
"What year does he t'ink is is now?"
"Early 2000's"
"'N I suppose he be lookin' fo' his Acolytes?"
Mystique said nothing; she didn't need to. Although Rogue would have undoubtedly been a valuable addition, for strategic purposes, Gambit was chosen. He was needed to get close to Magneto, to play the loyal follower in order to give the X-Men easy access to their enemy.
As Mystique explained who else was joining him on the mission Remy and Rogue stood, holding hands. Rogue slid her hand out of his and left the room. Remy watched her until the fire popped. He blinked and turned to Mystique. "Why get de ot'er X-Men involved? You're only endangerin' dem. Leme take care o' dis"
Mystique shook her head. "Xavier and I felt we should give you the most backup possible, this won't be simple."
Cause I'd love love love
To dance with my father again.
Rogue returned with a cardboard box that had a blue X drawn on each side so it could be identified no matter what side was facing out. As they all stood up, she put it on the coffee table and the room grew silent; the only sound was the radio playing softly in the kitchen. Rogue and Remy had lived in the X-Mansion and went on missions even after they married. But when Rogue realized she was pregnant, all that stopped. Remy bought an acre of land from Xavier and they built a house. Still close to their friends, but not too close. After Luke was born, Remy requested a leave of absense from the team. Neither him nor Rogue had been on a mission since. 4 years. That box had remained untouched for 4 years. Rogue tried to peel off the tape but her fingers were shaking too badly. After her third attempt, Remy reached over, and in one swift movement ripped the tape from the box. The noise seemed so loud and sudden against the gentle lull of the music in the background that all three couldn't help but look toward the stairs to see if it had woken Luke up. Rogue reached into the box and pulled out the first item; a trench coat. The trench coat. She handed it to Gambit who instantly reached into the pockets.
He frowned "Never replaced dem after de las' fight."
Rogue bit her lip and pulled out six packs of unopened playing cards; "Ah knew ya would forget, so ah stocked up."
"Ah, meci chere."
Next out of the box was a pair of heavy clunky boots. Remy frowned again "t'ought dey looked cool at de time."
Next out of the box was his uniform. As Rogue passed it to Remy, she tried to sound dismissive, but her shaking voice betrayed her. "Ah don't think your flabby body will fit inta that Swamp Rat."
"Oh really! Well," he mocked her accent "ah don't think your outfit will still fit ya. Dey weren't built for women who have carried child."
She hit him playfully then, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her toward him. Her arms were trapped between their bodies but she wouldn't have fought back even if she could. They swayed silently to the soft music from the kitchen as Mystique stood, feeling more like an intruder then she had ever felt in any form. Rogue felt Remy put his chin on her head as he wrapped his arms around her. She rested her head on his chest and put her arms up around his neck. She could hear his heartbeat again, feel his breath, and smell his scent. "Chere, it'll be fine! Ol' Gambits taken on Buckethead befo' and dat was wit'out de love of a good woman to drive him!"
Sometimes I'd listen outside her doorAnd I'd hear how my mother cried for him
I'd pray for her even more than me
I'd pray for her even more than me
~*~2 Weeks Later~*~
Rogue was at the kitchen table writing out invitations for Luke's 5th birthday party when she heard a knock at the front door. The other X-Men had decided to go to the mansion and wait to hear about their loved ones who left 15 days previous, but Rogue couldn't stand the tension, and Luke, sensing everyone's unease, wouldn't settle at night. So she came back to her house, less than half a mile from Mutant Manor and there she waited. 15 days she waited. The knock came again and Rogue willed herself to get up. The hallway to the front door looked miles long but she suddenly found herself putting her hand on the door handle, and turning it. Jean and Logan…no, they were Phoenix and Wolverine now…stood in front of her as Rogue blankly took in their appearance. Logan's uniform was torn and ripped and there was a large gash in his side that Rogue could tell should have been fatal, only for his healing factor. The lipstick kisses all over his face indicated he had already seen Ororo. Phoenix looked exhausted, ready to collapse at any minute. Her uniform was torn as well; the Phoenix wing that served as a strap was ripped and there were various burn marks and tears on the bodice.
As Rogue looked from one to the other, Jean reached out a hand to touch Rogue's arm. The dumbstruck mutant instinctively took a step back but Jean stretched and grabbed her friends hand. It was then that Rogue saw the tears in her eyes. Rogue shook her head, she gasped for breath before giving a little scream that turned into a sob. Without realizing it, she sank to the floor and put her face in her hands. As her body shook with raw grief, Jean knelt and stroked her friend's hair. Logan looked at the two women, unsure what to do when Luke appeared at top of the stairs.
In his hand he held a piece of paper where'd he been practicing writing his name; Luke LeBeau. He had finally got all his letters to face the correct way and wanted to show his Momma so he could sign his invitations. Oh, Aunt Jean and Uncle were there? That's ok, he would show them too! But Aunt Jean was sitting on the floor next to Momma, what were they doing? Did Momma fall? Logan looked up at the miniature Gumbo with his mother's eyes and began to ascend the stairs. Luke felt scared. Why didn't someone help Momma up?! Wolverine picked up Luke and carried him down the stairs.
I'd pray for her even more than me
I'd pray for her even more than me
~*~Two Days Later~*~
Rogue stood tall, rigid, in her knee length black dress. Her hair was in a simple, effortless half up, half down style. She couldn't put effort into anything right now. She couldn't accomplish even the simplest tasks. He was gone. She was ashamed, but she couldn't even look after her own son, he was with Scott and Jean. He looked so much like his father and his innocent questions nearly destroyed her. She knelt down in front of the headstone and ran her fingers over the name. Although Xavier had insisted a statue be erected in Remy's honor, Rogue had declined. She knew what Gambit would have said, "a big stat'ue like dat? They would t'ink I was tryin't compensate fo' somet'in!"
Rogue sighed, no, a statue would not have been Remy's scene. So she opted for a black marble headstone with gold lettering. She looked at all the information on the headstone and wished it were 100 times the size so she could try to begin to explain how special he really was. Even the people who had been there at the funeral the previous day didn't completely understand. Tears streamed down Rogue's face unchecked as she stood up. She kissed the top of the marble, and wrapping her coat tightly around her, began her walk to her car.
Without realizing it, she found herself driving up the road to Xavier's school. She realized she was ready. She needed to know what happened when the man in her life, her one and only love, put on that uniform, and kissed her goodbye that night. She needed to know what happened after he tipped Rogue a wink and walked out the door, never to return. Only one place had the answers she needed.
She still knew the way to Xaviers office, no matter how much the décor or the residents in the mansion changed, she doubted she would ever forget. All the times she walked these halls as a teenager…Goth makeup plastered on…But she wasn't that girl anymore. She was Rogue Le Beau. Despite all her talk on female oppression, she had taken Remy's last name. She couldn't really explain why she did it; she just felt it was appropriate. Lost in her thoughts, Rogue didn't even realize that the students in the halls were parting to let her through. There was a sort of sad elegance in the way Rogue's heels clicked on the floor, echoing in the unusually silent hall. She didn't even notice. Her lover had saved all these students and in doing so, sacrificed himself. They wanted to thank her, show their understanding at her loss, their appreciation of his sacrifice, but they didn't know how. It wasn't a class offered at school.
Suddenly, a girl stepped in front of Rogue, intending to offer her condolences. Professor Pryde-Wagner quickly grabbed the girls wrist and pulled her back while phasing her. Rogue walked through the girls arm as the other students looked on. But Rogue wasn't completely unaware of the world; she had been phased through enough times in her life to know the feeling well. She paused in her steps and turned to Kitty. The two women looked at each other. Shadowcat was unsure what to do, even after leaving school, she always seemed to put her foot in it, although Rogue usually laughed her off.
Rogue blinked and looked around at all the students…they seemed so young…staring at her. They immediately felt embarrassed to be imposing on the scene between the two X-Women, but not as embarrassed and shocked as Rogue appeared. Kitty looked at her friend and knew what she had to do. She slid her hand into Rogues and the two fell through the floor amidst gasps from the students. They landed a floor below, in an empty hallway. They exchanged hugs and wordlessly, Kitty led Rogue to Xavier's door.
The widow knocked and the door opened. "Come in Rogue," came Professor X's warm gentle voice. Kitty closed the door after her friend entered and made her way back to her class; she had homework to mark.
I know I'm praying for much too much
But could you send back the only man she loved
I know you don't do it usually
But dear God, she's dying
To dance with my father again
Rogue left Xavier's office feeling lonelier than ever; but at least she knew. She knew where her stop was…Scott and Jeans to pick up her son. She wasn't sure how she was going to explain what had happened, but she knew she had to tell him something. But how do you tell a 4 year old that Magneto trapped Shadowcat in one of his metal ball transporters and cut off the air so she slowly suffocated while hovering her 500 feet in the air so she couldn't phase out? How do you explain that when Phoenix tried to stop Magneto from pulling the adamantium from Wolverine's bones out through his pores, he wrapped a steel pole around her neck and body? Can a 4 year old understand Magma, Iceman and many others being pierced by knives and other objects being hurled at them while pushing their friends out of the way? Can a 4 year old understand the rage felt by Magneto when Gambit pried the steel pole off Jean's neck and body with his staff? Or when Gambit was levitated by the recently freed Phoenix to Shadowcats metal prison where he used a few strategically placed cards to crack the metal casing giving Shadowcat precious air? Can a 4 year old possibly comprehend what causes a man well into his 70's to become so consumed with hate that he uses cars, beams, and anything else possible to trap the X-Men and force them to watch as he grabs a former follower of his and slowly, painfully begins to clot the iron in his brain? Would Luke understand why his father grabbed Magneto's helmet and charged it while his friends helplessly looked on, knowing the full repercussions of his actions? Would Luke understand why his father was willing to leave his family forever so they could live on without him? Luke couldn't possibly understand the science behind his father's powers that enabled him to change energy in inorganic objects, such as a staff, or a card, or a helmet, and charge it so it became as deadly as a bomb. He also wouldn't understand how Jean had reached out and tried to rescue Remy's psyche, but it slipped from her grasp in the explosion as it asked her one final request. "Tell Luke dat his Daddy loves him, and tell Rogue…mon coeur et sa coeur....toujo-"
Rogue found herself in front of Scott and Jean's door, so she knocked. A few seconds passed and Jean opened the door. Before either had a chance to say anything, Luke jumped at his mother. "Momma! Where's Daddy?!"
"He's gone to heaven sweetie, he's gona love us and watch us from there now."
"Why Momma? I want Daddy here."
"Luke…remember this, your Daddy is in heaven because he was a good man…Luke, your Daddy's a hero."
~*~Present~*~
His dad was a hero…cool. Momma explained that Daddy had to go to heaven and watch over everyone from there because God chose him. Luke was accepting of Rogue's explanation even though he still missed his father sometimes. His Momma used to cry sometimes but only when she thought he couldn't see her. Rogue eventually was able to move on, she was finally able to not think about Remy constantly, every minute of every day, and in Rogues opinion, that was moving on, and all the moving on she would ever do. Maybe someday she'd be able to love another man, but she doubted it. No man would ever make her laugh like her Cajun, or keep her on her toes like he could. He was so full of surprises. The spontaneous dinners, the unexpected gift, the new dress on the bed and the booked babysitter. And then….and then the night of dancing that followed. One wouldn't think it to look at them apart, but Rogue and Gambit moulded perfectly to each other. The way their bodies swayed to the slow music as though they were one. Before Rogue gained control of her absorbtion powers, it was their only form of intimacy. She would be covered with material…gloves, long sleeves, tights, long skirt etc. but she could still feel his body heat through it all, and feel his chin on her head as she cautiously hid her face in his chest. And now…and now there would be no more dances, no more surprises. A lifetime alone loomed ahead of Rogue and she was baffled how people expected her to get through it.
If I could get another chance, another walk, another danceI'd play a song that would never ever end
Cause I'd love love love
For her to dance with my father again
"This mass is being offered for the soul of Remy LeBeau," the priest stated looking out at the congregation. It wasn't actually a complete mass, just a remembrance ceremony and blessing. Rogue appreciated her friends coming to show their respects and although there were fewer students than the previous year…how soon they forget…to the ones that were there, Rogue was grateful.
The mass ended less than an hour later, which was fortunate because the children were getting fidgety. Her friends waited for Rogue outside the church as she spoke briefly to the priest. As she walked toward them, Luke squeezed he hand. She looked down at him and he looked up at her, then over at the other children engrossed in a game of tag on the church lawn. Rogue smiled and nodded, so he broke free from her hand and ran off to join her friends. As she walked toward hers, she knew she would always feel that gaping hole in her heart, that feeling of incompleteness, but after two years, it was becoming something she could live with. Something she could bear. Rogue was determined to live her life and raise their son to the best of her ability, even if she had to do it with a broken heart.
Cause I'd love love love
For her to dance with my father again.
AN: So what did you think? My brother said I depressed him…I guess that was my intent! If people like it, I might follow it up with an epilogue or possibly a story. And for the record, I don't believe in Joe Q's "Dead stay dead" policy…after all, this is fanfiction! But that's for the sequel fic, if I write it…