Title: It Ain't Love
Author: Mercy Me Its Ashley
Summary: Ennis lays down his theory to a disappointed Jack.
Rating: PG13, for slash and the like.
Pairing: Ennis/Jack
Disclaimer: Brokeback Mountain is not mine. I take no ownership, nor am I making any financial gain from writing this.
Dedication: to Lori, my favorite BBM crazed writer.
It Ain't Love
The air in Jack's pick up was dangerously icy. Frigid, even.
They were about half way through the first hour long leg of their journey, and they'd hardly spoken a word to each other. Of course, there were the formalities. 'How's your girls?' 'Fine, and your boy?' Etc. But something about Ennis's silence was biting away at Jack's insides, tying his heart in knots and making his head race with worry.
Maybe this is it, Jack thought to himself, maybe Ennis's finally come to his senses, gonna break it off clean and go see his little girls.
Of course, Ennis was usually quiet, so at the same time, Jack figured he was overreacting at least somewhat.
"You know," Ennis's voice was slightly croakish as his lips parted for the first time in well over forty minutes, "I, uh, I been doing some thinkin' during these coupla months."
Jack threw him a slightly disbelieving glance, finding Ennis's glance laid low on the road, and his hands twitching nervously in his lap. Jack, who was still a little stunned by Ennis's sudden outburst of speech, went with a safe, hopefully comedic reply, waiting to see what tone this thinking would set.
"Oh yeah?" Jack asked in mock impression, "That's a good start, cowboy."
"Har-har," Ennis replied dryly.
Jack immediately repented, "Sorry, Ennis, just a li'le joke. I didn' mean a worda it."
Ennis didn't respond, instead going on with his train of thought, "I been thinkin', 'bout this thing we've got goin' on here."
Here it comes.
"Some folks, they'd say we's jus' like the sex."
Oh, god.
"Others, they might say we're, uh, in love, er somethin' like it."
Spit it out, Ennis, goddamn!
"Then again, some might say we jus' don't like our wives." Ennis cracked a rare smile at this, and Jack couldn't help but mirror it.
"I figure, though, that it's kin'a differ'nt from that. I figure we like each other too much for it to be jus' sex."
There's a plus, he likes me, but he don't want me no more.
"An' I don't know 'bout you, but I love my wife, or I did. Till she got them divorce papers and started shaking up with that other man.
"Anyways, I figure that it ain't love either, two fellas can't love each other like that, you know? No, I figure we got ourselves a unique sity-ation, here, rodeo. It ain't love, it ain't sex, it's jus' us."
And what the fuck does that mean? Jack's head screamed.
"So, uh, you got any thoughts?" Ennis sounded a little awkward, a little scared, now. Jack almost jumped when he heard it.
"I think you're right, cowboy, we got ourselves a unique situation," Jack's eyes didn't dare leave the road though. Because he was smarter than Ennis obviously considered him, and he knew bullshit when he smelt it.
It ain't love? Sure as hell is, cowboy.