Disintegration
"You lied. Again," Sonny stated coldly. His dark eyes were closed off, the fire of anger burned in them. That's all emotion he let show. He refused to let her see the hurt that he felt deep in his heart, all the way into his soul.
"I can explain," Carly insisted. Her eyes were wet with tears; some had already fallen blurring her makeup.
"Excuses Carly," he said in disgust. "You can always come up with something that sounds good. I'm tired of listening to them. This mockery of a marriage is over," Sonny seethed. Clenching his hands tightly he fought the urge to strike out at her. He would not become Deke. Carly had power, power to make him do things that he normally couldn't. She broke his trust, yet he trusted her. She betrayed him, yet he forgave her. Repeatedly. That was stopping, here and now. In their last few moments together that power would not turn him into the monster he hated.
"Don't!" she screamed. "We both know it's not true. We love each other Sonny," Carly reminded him, her voice hitched. "We're in each others hearts … souls." Her eyes were bright with desperation. She saw her world crumbling around her but she refused to give up. She'd claw up the falling pieces until she was on top again, until Sonny understood and forgave her.
"What heart? You don't have a heart Carly. You know nothing about real love. All you do is wreak and destroy. You did it to your mother, to Jason, to AJ … did I learn? No. I foolishly thought we'd be different." His voice was low, and it gained speed as he threw out accusations. Carly seemed to grow smaller with each word.
"It is. You have to listen to me Sonny," Carly begged. "I had my reasons."
His laugh was bitter. "Reasons? You kept me from knowing about my child!"
"I'm not the only one," she spat out. Her anger was taking the place of her hurt. Feeling stronger, she crossed one arm over her torso an unconscious move to protect herself while the other rested on her hip. "Alexis didn't want you to know either," Carly pointed out. "She wanted to protect her child from your life. I guess she doesn't reside on that pedestal you put her on anymore, does she?"
"Leave Alexis out of this," Sonny warned. The issues between him and Alexis were separate. He wouldn't let Carly color his view. He had to think of his child, which meant coming to terms with Alexis' actions.
"God!" Carly screeched. "Even now she can do no wrong. Do you know how that makes me feel?"
"It doesn't matter."
Carly's jaw dropped. Sonny's words were so causal, so remote. They stung. Those three little words were worse then any blow she'd ever received, emotional or physical. "You can't mean that," she pleaded softly.
Vulnerability loosened her stance. Sonny could practically see her heart bleeding. He wanted to decimate it like she had his. "You don't matter to me anymore Carly. We're through. No matter what any paper says I'm not your husband. You're dead to me."
Carly flinched. He met it. Every last word. Her head spun. This couldn't be happening, it just couldn't. Desperate she cried, "Sonny you have to see this from my point of view. I know what it's like to have someone take that choice away from me. Robin told AJ about Michael and ruined everything. I despise Alexis you know that but I wouldn't do that to her. As a mother it was her decision to make. I wanted her to tell you. I asked her, I pleaded with her …"
"You also tried to get her out of Port Charles when you first found out," he yelled cutting off her justification. "You stole from Jax and paid Alexis' old firm to get her away from me."
"That was before," she protested.
Sonny shook his head. Carly would never let herself see it. "I had every right to know. I'm that's baby's father."
"Hypocrite," Carly shouted. It occurred to her that she was being hypocritical to, but she didn't care. "That's all fine and good for you, but not AJ? Nice double standard you have there! You say I wreck things – well you do too! Everyone you touch gets hurt. Your child won't be any different," she taunted.
Out of nowhere his hand came up and connected with her face. The sickening sound of flesh against flesh rang out. Carly's hand few to her reddening cheek. Shaking she took a step back hating Sonny, and herself.
Sonny stood still, repulsed and shocked by what just happened. His arm, the one that struck out, hung limp by his side. He had hit a woman. His stomach turned. "I'm … Carly I'm sorry."
Her eyes were dry, flat. "That's a first," she commented. Carly expected her voice to shake but it didn't. "You're right though. We are over." Her movements were jerky. Grabbing her purse and jacket, she was grateful that Michael was at school. She could pick him up and they'd never have to come back to the penthouse again. Yanking the door open she came face to face with a guard. "Johnny."
"Yes Mrs. Corinthos?"
"When Leticia comes back would you tell her to pack everything up that belongs to her, me and Michael? Have them delivered to my mother's please?"
"I, ah …" Johnny fumbled and looked to Sonny. His boss nodded his head. Confused, but knowing his placed he simply agreed. "Sure thing Mrs. Corinthos."
"It's Miss Spencer Johnny," Carly informed him. Posture iron straight, she walked out of the penthouse head held high.
"Close the door Johnny," Sonny ordered. The guard nodded, and the door clicked closed. Numb Sonny walked over to the bar and poured himself a drink. He never thought he'd lose Carly. His child was supposed to hers, theirs. In gaining the child he always wanted he lost the woman he loved. Not that she deserved it, Sonny thought resentfully.
Lies. Half-truths. Things left unsaid. That's what Carly called loved. There was no honor there, no trust. That was not a relationship. It was a mockery, a sham.
Looking down at his hand Sonny shuddered. He had hit a woman. Disgusted with himself he gulped down his drink. What kind of man was he? Was he even worthy of a child?
His questions went unanswered. His fears nagged him. His actions haunted.