Growing Pains
Today I shot another human being. No, today I KILLED another human being.
The black words glared at him from the white screen as he reached down to put a hand on Lucas' shoulder. The teen sat slumped over in his chair, head and arms sprawled across the desk, in an unsettled sleep. Nathan Bridger slid his arm around the younger man's shoulder, grasped him under the other arm and gently lifted him upward.
"C'mon Lucas, let's get you to bed," he said quietly, half carrying him as Lucas lurched forward, eyes barely cracked, and crumpled onto the bed. Pulling the blankets up over the boy to his shoulders, Bridger let his hand caress the teen's cheek briefly, brushing the long hair back off the face. "Sweet dreams, son" he whispered, knowing that for both of them a dreamless sleep was the best they could hope for.
A shot of pain ran up his spine, his injured leg letting him know that he had been standing for too long so he dragged over the desk chair and dropped into it. He knew that he should head back to MedBay, that Kristin was there, waiting to chain him down to the bed, and to put her off was playing with fire but he couldn't find the energy to get up and leave. He looked at the teen curled in a ball on the bed, wanting to be there if he had a nightmare, if he needed to talk. It was suppose to be a diplomatic mission, dammit ! How could have things ended up in such a mess, he asked himself as he rubbed at aching neck muscles. Closing his eyes, the events of the day started to replay again in his memory as he searched for things that could have been done to change the outcome. ********
Earlier that day......
The shuttle slowly moved into position and there was a small bump as it hit the dock. People moved around quickly, preparing for unloading while Lucas waited impatiently by the hatch, ready to be the first one out.
Crocker stepped forward towards the boy and looked him in the eye. "Security first, Lucas. You need to wait here till we know the area is secure," he said in a no nonsense, don't argue with me voice. The security force of six was gathering, checking their equipment, as Crocker swung the hatch open slowly.
"Ah, Chief, the rebels are suppose to be contained on the other side of the island. Nothing's going to happen," the boy responded, giving Crocker a wide smile, excited to see a new place, to meet new people.
Bridger's voice reached him from the other side of the shuttle. "He's right, Lucas, let him do his job. I hate playing diplomat, but we were sent here as
a show of support for the elected government, and we'll play it by the books. Besides, we don't want the Ambassador to think badly of us if we don't give her the whole show. We'll have plenty of time to do some sight seeing."
Bridger stood, picking up a small black briefcase, and turned to Ambassador Lessman. "We should be ready to go ashore in a few minutes, ma'am."
The Ambassador stood up, tugging at the bottom of her suit jacket. "Why can't we ever have informal meetings at the beach in t shirts and cut offs ? I'm sure we can find the path to peace just as well in flip flop as in high heels," she griped as she gathered up several carryalls, giving Lucas a smile full of playfulness."
Lucas returned her smile, once again taken back by this person. She wasn't like most of the Ambassadors he had met while on seaQuest. She treated him like an adult, taking the time to listen to him, asking him questions about Darwin and the vocorder and even had joined them for a swim one day. Most of the high ranking UEO officials he had met brushed him away like an annoying fly or they patted him on the head, treating him like a six year old. "You could always play hookey and come to the beach," he asked hopefully.
"Work first, then play, I'm afraid," Amy Lessman sighed. "If we can convince the Tuvalu government to sit down with the Ellice tribe and talk instead of fight, life would be better for everyone on the island and then we can have a big beach party to celebrate ".
Crocker appeared in the doorway. "All clear, Cap. You can step ashore now, the governor is waiting.
"I don't know, Amy, the rebels seemed to have some very real complaints about the way their people have been treated. I'm not sure that the UEO should be throwing their support behind O'Leary and his government." Bridger responded as he moved forward though the hatch and then waited as the Ambassador also stepped though into the sunlight. They walked forward side by side to meet the welcome committee as Lucas trailed behind looking at the crowds, the band playing, the children with flowers waiting to greet them.
"O'Leary is the elected official of the majority of people who live here. Even though their ancestors were one time immigrants, these people have as much right to be here as the ancient tribe. The Ellice are declining in numbers and it's in their best interest to find a way to live and work together with the Tuvalus rather then to rebel against them. The two cultures could form a impressive union if they gave it a chance," Amy whispered as they approached the Governor and his party and put on her most charming smile. "Governor O'Leary, so nice to see you ! May I present to you Captain Bridger of the seaQuest."
"It is a pleasure seeing your face after hearing your voice for so long, Ambassador Lessman." The tall thin man with blond hair and pale skin, a common characteristic for his people, was dressed in a heavy formal suit and dark heavy shoes which seemed out of place in the tropical climate where most of the others wore casual clothes and more traditional native attire. Bridger wonder if he had made a mistake wearing his regulation summer uniform of khaki shorts and shirt. The Governor seems wrapped in the trappings of power and position. Amy had wanted to keep things relaxed and light but the Governor obviously had different ideas. "Captain Bridger, I would relish the opportunity to tour your vessel. Just knowing that kind of fire power is sitting in our harbor will change the attitudes of those rebellious Ellice. They'll be on the ground begging forgiveness before sundown."
"Respectfully sir, the seaQuest is mostly a scientific and exploration vessel. Our military power is used for self defense, to help those in need who need protection, not to scare others into submission,"Bridger said stiffly, taking an instant dislike to this man but trying to keep it out of his voice.
"Exactly Captain ! We need your protection from the Ellice. They want to come in and disrupt our way of life, to tear apart our society because they don't' agree with it."His voice sunk to a whisper "Personally, I think they're jealous of us, of what we've made for ourselves and they want to take it for themselves.
Bridger opened his mouth, but the Ambassador jumped in before he could utter a sound. "Part of the reason we bought the seaQuest was to show the tribe some of the advantages and highlights of the UEO, that we're not just an aggressive society, that we are interested in cultural harmony and independence. If we take the time to listen to the Ellice, I think we can work out a territorial agreements that will please everyone." Noticing the skeptical frown starting to form on the Governor's face, Lessman motioned Lucas forward. "We also brought this young man with us. He is one of the UEO's most promising up and coming scientists, Lucas Wolenczak." Lucas stuck out his hand towards O'Leary, who look him up and down for a second and then shook it in return, a reluctant half- smile on his face. "I thought that bringing him that the Ellice might be more relax and open, feeling less threaten. After all, they are showing great faith by coming here, and they have the most to lose. Their culture places great value on their young people, recognizing that they represent the future, the hope for the continuance of their tribe."
"Well, um, yes, that sounds like a good idea, Ambassador. You are more experienced at these things than I am, of course." The Governor gave her a patronizing smile. "Shall we go ? The sooner we get these unpleasantries finished with, the more time I have to show your the wonders of our little paradise." The Governor started a slow walk up the street, pausing to shake a hand or pat a head, the benevolent leader greeting his people, Ambassador Lessman moving by his side as bodyguards and UEO security moved in behind.
Lucas threw the captain a look, which Bridger translated into "I don't think I'm going to like this as much as I thought" and trudged slowly up the hill, his morning exuberance starting to fade. Bridger noted with amusement that some of the island's children started following the young man, giggling and dancing, darting up to skip and prance around him. Lucas pretended not to notice them, until suddenly he turned around and made a silly face, which made the children giggle even more.
The Captain had misgivings in the beginning about bringing Lucas with them
but decided that the educational benefits outweighed any risks that he could think of and it would be a good lesson in diplomacy. After all, what good was having the boy travel on seaQuest if he couldn't experience new places and people. Crocker would make sure that they were well protected and there was really no threat from the Ellice , who seemed to be protecting their land and families but not provoking the Tuvalu army. He knew that the Ambassador really believed what she had told the Governor but really didn't see how having Lucas there would convince the Ellice to agree to a treaty. Personally, he would have rather gone and visited a tribal village, more interested in hearing their side of the story than having to play nice with O'Leary, who seemed totally unwilling to push aside his prejudice towards the tribe, no matter what he claimed. Hustling to catch up to Lucas, who was now giving piggy back rides and playing short games of chase and tickle with the children as they moved along, he tried to adopt a more neutral, open attitude. They were approaching a large dark multi level building, with a sign that said "City Hall", that seemed out of place among the smaller one story buildings of the city. Miracles happen, and maybe they could hammer out a preliminary agreement by lunch so they could get in some snorkeling by sundown.
****
Lucas stared out the window, playing with his hair and wishing he had brought along a computer. At first, he had been excited, and even flattered, to have been asked to come along, his curiosity aroused at the prospect of meeting new people and watching as negotiations took place. Now he was just plain bored. The room was stuffy and hot, and neither side seemed interested in listening to the other side.
He knew from his research the Ellice people had been living on the islands before boats of immigrants came, escaping volcanos on their native islands. Slowly, the Tuvalu island were take over by the new people, pushing the Ellice out of their land and attracting their young people to the cities. Neither side had been over aggressive and had been living an uneasy peace for years until now. A group of Ellice rebels had been testing the Tuvalu army, seeing how far they could push them, slowly taking back more land, making the Tuvalus move back to the safety of the cities and now wanted representation in the government. Moving in his chair restlessly, his stomach started growling.
Glancing at the frowns on the faces in the room and the negative body language being displayed, he sighed quietly. He should know better after all this time not to hang out with adults.
Bridger noticed Lucas wiggling in his chair and shot him a glare. Not that he blamed the kid. Mikki, the Ellice representative, did seem please to see Lucas, trying to communicate in broken English, and hand signals and treated him more politely than any of the others. When ever he seemed on the edge of anger, Mikki looked over to the teen, and seemed to settle himself. But nothing seemed to break through the stone wall that had brought a screeching halt to the negotiations. Neither side wanted to budge on their positions regarding the fishing rights of the Ellice side of the island.
Ambassador pushed back her chair and stood up, stretching her back muscles to loosen up, announcing, " I think we need a break. I think the Governor said something about a festival ?"
"Oh, yes, we have a lovely feast prepared, and some of our men will be available to escort you around the city, showing you our businesses. The children have prepared a short play, a salute to the UEO and to the United States of America, " the Governor announced proudly. Turning the to the Ellice representative, "of course you're welcome to join us or maybe you and your friends feel more comfortable taking a break outside on the beach" he commented, moving towards the door .
Super, Lucas thought. Well, at least I can get something to eat and maybe the Captain will let me escape back the boat since it doesn't look like we'll be hitting the beach today. Walking with Crocker and three of the security men, he turned the corner to enter the banquet room and was surprised at the gaudily decorated room topped off by the seaQuest shaped cake in the center of the table. Heavy fabric in golds, purple and pinks were hung and draped every where, with balloons hanging off of walls and the ceiling. Flower arrangements took up much of the table space, and each place setting had four forks and spoons, three glasses and a little American flag with the words 'God Bles the UEO printed on it'.
The Governor beamed proudly as he indicated where each person should sit. "We weren't sure about how to properly decorate for such an occasion so we viewed several of your American movies and televison shows to find tips on appropriate party decor. Please sit and enjoy some of the specialties of our island!" Several women carried in platters and set them on the table, bowing and stepping back.
The Ambassador sat to the right of the Governor, with Bridger next to her and Lucas next to the Captain. Three of the Governors men sat to the left of him. Crocker and his men settled at another table. Mikki, with a pat on the back for Lucas, slipped out of the room, unnoticed by the others.
"Apparently they missed the Best of Martha Stewart tapes," Bridger whispered quietly to Lucas, who bit back a laugh. Somebody was trying a bit too hard to impress them. Lifting the cover of the platter, the Captain was amused to find fish, pieces of banana, coconut meat, and slices of papaya.
"Should of spent less time on the decorations and more time on the food," Lucas muttered, reaching with his fork to stab a piece of fish. "Think they have pizza here ?"
"Shh. I'll have Crocker escort you back to the seaQuest. Go see the cook and beg for a couple of pieces of chocolate cake I saw her baking last night. I'm sorry this went so badly but maybe next time you won't hassle me about coming along." Picking out some food for his own plate and sampling some fish , he said encouraging, "Try it, it's not too bad."
The afternoon wore on, as sun heated the room, and child dancers did a series of dances and sang American patriotic songs. There had only been wine to drink and Lucas was starting to feel drowsy with the effects of the alcohol and the warm air. Feeling a tug at his elbow, he turned his head to hear Bridger's quiet come with me as Bridger stood up and walk to the door. Rising quickly to follow, he noticed the Ambassador and the Governor had their heads together, talking quietly. Crocker rose and then sank back into his chair at Bridger's head shake.
"Whew. I had to get out of there," Bridger said tiredly as he looked for the bathroom they had passed in the hall. "The wine was going straight to my head. Be right out," as the door shut. Lucas shuffled his feet impatiently as he looked around at main government building. It was several stories built like a house with a small hallway, several rooms and stairs leading upward. People were walking around, in and out rooms and up the steps, giving him a friendly smile which he returned. After Bridger emerged, he took his turn and then stepped out of the bathroom. "Um, I saw a small store across the street when we came in. Could we go over and see if they have a Coke or something," he asked in his best pleading voice.
Bridger hesitated for a minute, knowing he should stop and get Crocker to go with them and then shrug off the thought. They'd be all right for a few minutes. "Brains before beauty," he smiled with a wave of his arm. They left the building and walked across the paved road, entering the store.
It was a small store, no bigger than the Captain's cabin, and it was packed from floor to ceiling with shelves loaded with various merchandise. Bridger saw various food items, bolts of fabric, building supplies, health items and everything in between. There were three other people shopping with baskets who gave them a quick glance as they came in and then proceeded to ignore them.
Lucas walked over to a small dingy white refrigerator that needed a good scrubbing and took out a bottle of cola. A man appeared from behind a stack of boxes, smiling and speaking in an unfamiliar language. The Captain raised his hands and shook his head. "Do you speak English?" Holding out his hand, the shopkeeper pointed to the bottle of soda. "Speaks the international language of money," Bridger commented as he took out his wallet. Displaying a handful of American coins and dollars, the man picked out a bill and a few coins, jabbering at them in his native tongue.
"Another successful transaction, Captain," Lucas laughed as he popped the top of his soda. Wandering towards the back of the store, he stopped to examine various sizes of cloth that appeared hand woven.
"Uh, Lucas, we really need to get back now," Bridger reminded, moving to the front door.
"Wouldn't Dr. Westphalen love this for her cabin ? These are her favorite colors," the teen said, holding up a square the size of a throw blanket woven in purples, white and yellows.
With a sigh, Bridger walked over to the teen and took the fabric from him. The store owner also moved towards them smelling another sale. "Crocker is going to have my head if we don't get back there. While I'm taking the planned tour, I'll ask if we can stop back in here and get it for her."
As they headed for the door, three men entered and quickly shut the door, blocking the way.
"Excuse us, could we get by" Bridger asked politely as they tried to move around the men. "UEO ? Americans ?" One of the men, blonde, dressed in shorts and a T shirt jeered angrily. He grabbed Bridger by the arm, moving swiftly, twisting it behind the Captain's back. Lucas rushed forward, bulldozing into the man that held the Captain. "Hey, get your hands off " he yelled. He was stopped by another man, dressed in Ellice traditional clothing, who then pushed him away. "Get out of here, child. This fight does not concern a mituto like you."
The third man, with a bald head, pulled a gun out of the waist band of his shorts. Waving at the shopkeeper, barking out orders, the terrified man opened up a drawer and started pulling out bills and coins.
Bridger tried to look at Lucas as fire spread though his arm down his spine. "Lucas, keep quiet and do as they say. If they tell you to get out, do it," he ordered quietly but firmly. He noticed that all the men had the tattoo of the Ellice on their hands. The man at the other end of his arm started pushing him towards the back of the store as man in Ellice clothing herded the other shoppers and store owner back also. He noticed with relief that Lucas was ignored.
Lucas pressed himself against the wall, hoping not to be noticed so he could slip out and get help. He didn't like the thought of abandoning the Captain, but knew there was not much he could do without some back up. A loud thud from the back of the store made him shrink into the wall a little bit further. I had to have a soda, he thought guiltily. Crocker was going to be really pissed.
After waiting for a few minutes, he gave a sigh of relief. No one had come back looking for him. He slowly inched his way against the wall, around the corner, his eyes on the door as he crept towards it, trying not to make a sound.
"Hey, not so fast, kid !"
The angry voice made him jump out of his skin as he reached for the doorknob and jerked the door open. His body froze though, when he felt the cold steel tip of a gun on the back of his neck. Spinning around, he met the icy blue eyes of the bald man.
"Leaving the party so soon ?" the man sneered at him. "The Ellice jerks are too easy on kids like you , but I have no qualms about using a little discipline. So don't get any funny ideas. Anyway, I really think that your Captain could use a friend about now." The man shoved him towards the back of the store. "Now get moving."
The three shoppers and the store owner were huddled in one corner, talking quietly. Captain Bridger was lying on the floor by the wall, a gash on his forehead. Rushing over and kneeling down, Lucas threw an hateful look towards their captors.
"Oh, your Captain is so clumsy. He ran into the wall. He really should try to get along with others." The men looked at each other and broke out in laughter.
"What do you want? You have the money from the store. Why don't you leave before UEO security gets here and nails your butts to the wall?" the teen asked defiantly, standing up to take a few steps toward them.
"We want the UEO to come, little man. We want to tell them that the Ellice Alliance will never settle for any treaty, that we want the Tuvalu to leave this island. This is Ellice land and we want it back." The blonde motioned for the others two to pick Bridger up off the floor. "We shall show them how the Tuvalu treat us, how they push us so that we must fight. They come to our villages to frighten us, beating our men and our women while our children stand by, screaming and crying." His fist shot out quickly, punching Bridger three times in the stomach. "The UEO doesn't care, listens to the lies of the hasuntos, the enemy." Looking dispassionately at the Captain who was sagging between the two men, he grabbed him by the hair to look him in the eyes. "So brave Captain who came and tried to negotiate the treaty, you will take back the message that the Ellice will not settle, will not make deals with the hasuntos." The Captain was flung to the floor and curled up into a ball, gasping for breath.
Lucas moved quickly to the Captain' side, placing a protective hand on his arm. "This isn't the way to do it. The UEO will crucify you for this, won't listen to a word you have to say now. You'll all be branded violent criminals and hunted down."
"Then we will die proudly for our cause and others will take our place. No one will be safe as long as the Tuvalu rule. Already we have plans to capture the Governor and your Ambassador. No one will stand in the way of Ellice freedom." The one in Ellice clothing reached to pull Lucas away from Bridger but Lucas struggled, flailing his arms and dragging his feet. "You and your Captain will help deliver this message, though your Captain may not be able to talk for awhile."
"Wait ! Take me ! Leave the Captain and take me to the villages ! Let me talk to the people, show me what the Tuvalu have done to you. The UEO will listen to me ! There's must be a better way to help your people." The teen pleaded as he was thrown into the arms of the bald headed man, fighting for freedom as the man put the gun down to get a better grip on him.
"Frenki, take the boy up front. He doesn't have to watch this," the one in Ellice clothing told the dark haired man. " Lock the others up in the closet so we don't have to worry about them escaping or getting in the way and then come hold Bridger down," he added to the blonde man as he advanced on the Captain, picking up two long pieces of rope. The blonde man locked the closet door and then came and pushed the Captain down on his back, sitting on his legs and pulling his hands up and forward. Bridger struggled, trying to roll to his side, using his hands to try and shove the man off but was still dizzy from smashing into the wall and was quickly overcome. His legs and arms were tied securely and he was soon laying trussed up on the floor.
The sound of flesh hitting flesh sent a chill down Lucas' spine and he double his efforts to escape, yelling and fighting the arm that held him, dragging him down the aisle. Where the hell was Crocker ? "No, don't do this to him, he can help you, he hasn't done anything to you!"
"It's not who he is, it's what he represents," hot breath hissed in his ear.
A sharp cry of pain came from the back of the store. Using a surge of adrenaline, Lucas half turned in his captors grasp, kneed him in between the legs and swung his arm as hard as he could, his fist connecting with the bald man's cheek. The bald man stumbled backwards, falling into a box as boxes came tumbling down on his body and he laid there, stunned. Lucas plunged forward, and spying the forgotten gun, grabbed it.
The blonde and the Ellice man had their backs turned to him as he moved quietly forward, and he saw the blond kicking the Captain repeatedly in his lower leg and knee.
"No, stop it, stop hurting him!," the teen screamed, moving carefully so he could keep an eye on them and still see anyone trying to sneak up behind him. His hands shaking, perspiration dripping down his pale face, he prayed that they would listen, that they would run out, that they wouldn't challenge his bluff. "Back off now or I'll shoot," he warned.
The blonde man laughed as he kicked Bridger in the ribs. "Who are you kidding ? You couldn't harm a fly. Have you even touched a gun before ? Drop the gun, and go back to the front or you'll be joining the Captain on the floor." He jerked his head at the other man, who yanked the Captain to a semi sitting position, and smacked him across the face several times.
"No, stop it !" Lucas steadied the gun, and slowly squeezed the trigger, closing his eyes at the last minute as he fired once, twice, three times.
Bridger bit back a gasp of pain as a heavy weight fell on top of him and he twisted and turned his body to free himself. Looking up, he saw Lucas standing there, white faced, a look of horror on his face, holding a gun up in front of him. He was shocked to look into the lifeless eyes on the body that had fallen on him as blood started to pool on the floor. Another man stood, hands partially raised, staring in surprise at Lucas. The sound of wood cracking echoed from the front of the store but he could only focus on the teen, who still stood there, trembling, holding the gun, looking at the body on the floor. The other man started moving towards the teen as Bridger exclaimed, "Lucas," in warning.
The teen jerked the gun in the direction of the moving man who stopped and then turned, running down the aisle.
"Cap! Lucas ! Are you here ?" Crocker's voice bellowed across the store and then he slowly appeared, gun drawn, looking around cautiously. "Sweet Jesus ! What happened here !" He stood in shock, looking at the Captain lying tied on the floor, blood on his fore head and a body by his side, lying in blood. He started walking over to Lucas, but stopped short when Lucas and the gun, still held upright with both hands, swung in his direction. "Whoa, son ! Put that thing down before someone gets hurt."
"Too late for that, Chief" Bridger said tiredly as he pushed back against the wall, trying to slide up it to a standing position. He settled for a semi sitting position. "Lucas, it's Crocker. Hand him the gun, Lucas, hand him the gun," he said slowly and clearly, not liking the slightly unfocused look that the teen gave him.
Shaking his head, as if to clear it, he blinked several times and then Lucas bent down and carefully placed the gun on the floor and snatched his hands back like it was made of hot metal. "I had to stop them - they were hurting him," he whispered quietly to himself, as Crocker placed a comforting hand on his shoulder and picked up the gun gingerly with the other one.
Other security men had appeared, and one was releasing Bridger from his ropes. "There were two other men, one bald, one in a blue and green wrapping, like a short skirt." Bridger stretched slowly, rubbing his aching wrists and using the wet gauze someone handed him to cautiously dab his forehead. Looking with remorse at the body, he nodded silently at it to Crocker, hoping the security chief would get the message to handle the removal quickly and quiet
"The bald guy was rolling around the floor in pain when we came in and the other guy ran right into us. They're both outside in custody. Crocker gave Bridger a quick up and down look as he talked, judging his injuries with an experienced eye. Reaching down with one hand to pull the Captain up, he was surprised when Bridger took one step forward and then started sinking to the floor again.
"Leg," Bridger hissed through clenched teeth. "Kicked me several times." He griped Crocker's arm as the Security Chief slide an arm around his shoulder. He saw the unasked question in his old friend's eyes and suppressed his own powerful emotions that were threatening to overwhelm him. " I'm all right ...for now. I've got to get over to Lucas... I'll explain everything in a minute," and the Chief helped him over to the teen.
Lucas still stood there, as his mind churned with emotions, still digesting what he had done. He focused slowly on Bridger when the Captain placed a tentative hand on his shoulder.
"You had to do it. I know that it was difficult, I know how it feels but I know you HAD to do it." Bridger said softly, capturing Lucas under his chin, bringing his face around, noting the hollow, dazed eyes. "Let's get you out of here and back to the boat." He had to get Lucas back to safe ground, back home.
Slowly, Bridger lead the teen from the store, around the crowd that had gathered outside. He saw the Ambassador, the Governor and security standing outside talking loudly, gesturing with their hands. Damn, have to tell Crocker to be on the watch for an assassination attempt, he thought to himself. Don't know who else is working for the rebels and if they were telling the truth. Seeing a bench, he parked the teen on it and limped over to talk briefly with Crocker, giving a short but descriptive summary of the shooting. "I'll send Ford back to take command of the situation. I'm not sure what this will do to negotiations, but I've got to see to Lucas. Everybody else will just have to wait."
Crocker shook his head with sadness. "Poor kid. It's a tough thing to handle, even if it was in self defense. I'm sure the Ambassador will take care of everything."
Making his way back to the bench, the Captain saw a crowd move towards the beach with the body of his attacker on a makeshift stretcher. Mikki, the Ellice representative, moved behind the crowd, talking quietly in his language. Bridger blinked when he saw the bench were Lucas was sitting was in their path and tried to move as quickly as his leg would let him. This would be the last thing the boy needed. Unfortunately, the boy saw the crowd moving towards him and Bridger saw the teen's face turn ashen, his eyes moving nervously, trying to look elsewhere, twisting his foot into the sand.
Hurrying over to the teen, he gave the boy a sympathetic look and slid an arm around the boy's back as Lucas turned to look at the ocean.
Mikki stopped in front of them, trying to be sociable to the UEO peacemakers, giving them a small weak smile. "He was my brother...," he murmured in an almost apologetic tone.
Hearing this, Lucas let out a small gasp and ran off towards the dock.
Noticing the shocked expression on the Ellice representatives face, Bridger tried to explain briefly what had happened in the store and that Lucas had only been trying to protect him but translation problems made the whole story confusing. Exhaling, torn between figuring out the legal ramifications and going to help Lucas deal with the emotional ramifications, he shook his head, running his hand through his hair. "I'm sorry, I have to go. I'm sorry your brother is dead but he was involved, um, he was not a good man." Great, how do I tell this man his brother almost beat the living daylights out of me and a sixteen year old kid shot him to death ? Maybe this man knew what his brother was up to, maybe he's involved in this whole mess and things are going to get worse. Talk about nightmares.
Seeing Crocker, he waved over to him, pointing at the Ellice man. "Chief, could you find someone to help explain the situation to him. I've got to get back to the boat." With that, he hurried off to the boat, ignoring the Ellice man who was trying desperately to get his attention while Crocker stood in front of him, trying to make soothing diplomatic comments, looking for a translator to help explain what had happened.
By the time Bridger reached the dock the adrenaline high he had been depending on had been depleted, and he felt a million years old. Judging by the startled reaction of the crewman who subtly lent him a strong hand when he stumbled through the doorway, he looked it too. Taking a moment to relax and close his eyes briefly as he fought off the pain that was starting to consume his body like a wild fire, he jumped as a cool hand touched the cut on his forehead. Seeing the worried eyes of Dr. Westphalen, he smelled trouble ahead.
Summoning all his strength, he stood up nonchalantly, side stepped and started walking from the launch with a curt nod to Kristin.
"Not so fast, Captain."
The crisp British tone would have frozen anyone else in their tracks but Nathan knew if he stopped now, he was on a one stop flight straight to Med Bay. "Not now, Kristin. I'll be down later for some of your... hospitality." Lucas was his first priority at this point; the look in the teen's eyes when he had seen the crowd with the dead man worried him. It had taken three days of depression and heavy drinking to get over the emotional turmoil that had beset him when he had taken the life of another person for the first time and he had been a trained soldier, an adult, in battle. What would it do to a teenager, who had monumental self doubt weekly and mood swings that shook the boat on a regular basis ?
"Stop. Or I will sign an Unfit for Command Order and you'll be isolated, sedated and restrained for two months." Kristin's mouth was set in a fine line, her eyes hard.
Shit. The "just ignore her" method wasn't going to work. He turned to look at her with a frown and was surprised when she pushed him around the corner and gave him a fast, hard hug.
"Don't start with me, Bridger. Crocker called ahead. I've sent people to Lucas' room but he's locked the door and refuses to see any one." She grabbed his arm as he tried to whirl away. Her voice soften at the mixture of anger and sadness on his face. "You are on the verge physical collapse and need medical attention." Feeling his body relax, and taking it as a sign of accession, led him peacefully to Med Bay, helping him settle on a exam table, shooing everyone else from the room.
As the exam progressed, Kristin grew more and more disturbed. The Captain was being too passive and withdrawn, not making a sound, as she poked and prodded him. Crocker's message had been short, just that the Captain had been hurt but she heard the alarm sound in his voice as if there were a lot more to the story and he didn't want to be the one to tell it. As she wrapped a bandage snugly around the knee, she asked casually, "Well, are you going to tell me what happened ? I send you out on a quiet diplomatic mission and you come back looking like a punching bag and Lucas growling like a bear at anyone who got in his way." Finishing with the leg, she helped him remove his shirt so she could tap his chest gently, looking for broken ribs.
"Lucas killed some one." Not knowing how the Doctor would react, he kept his voice flat, emotionless. Some how it saying it out loud made it worse, made it even more real.
Kristin's hands stopped briefly. "Dear God," she whispered quietly, letting the shock run through her, a sympathetic prayer going out for the teen, a moment of regret for innocence lost and then she moved her hands to touch Nathan's face, probing the gash on his forehead lightly and fingering the bruises around his mouth. "Tell me what happened - all of it," she ordered sternly.
As the Captain talked about the events of the day, she could hear the self recrimination in his voice. Shaking his head, he asked tiredly, "Why did I leave the building without security? Why did I take him in the first place and what am I going to tell his parents ? Your son's a trained killer now - it's the military way? You should have seen him, seen the look of horror on his face as he pulled the trigger. I should have fought harder, ordered him to escape, to run away..."
"Nathan...," Kristin warned, not liking Bridger's uncharacteristic wallow in self pity.
He stopped his tirade of words. "I'm bordering on hysterical here, aren't I?"
As she moved around slowly, cleaning up her supplies, washing her hands, she gave him a small smile. "Give the kid a break - he doesn't need to deal with your guilt too. It was self defense and you need to reassure him that he acted correctly ." She gave him a little shake. "You've got to show him that he did nothing wrong, that he had to make a difficult choice and acted courageously. I didn't even know he knew how to operate an armed weapon. We've had our share of debates about this, Nathan, civilians aboard a military vessel. At some point something like this was bound to happen. Look at the whole Stark thing - it was there right at the beginning." She hand him several pills and a small glass of water.
Bridger swallowed the pills, took a sip and laid there for a minute, contemplating her words, reflecting on his own emotions as the medication flooded his brain numbing the discomfort. " So are you suggesting I not make a big deal about it. It's not going to go away if we just ignore it, Kristin."
Rummaging through a cabinet, she pulled out a T-shirt and a pair of sweat pants. "Now did I say that ? Of course, there's going to be psychological trauma, nightmares - he's going to need some counseling. But what he needs most is a strong shoulder and complete acceptance. Bad things happen to good people, Nathan, you know that better than most." She tossed the clothes at him. "Here, laundry sent some of your clothes here by mistake again. The trick is to not let the emotional trauma consume us the rest of our lives- you've learned that by experience, he will, with time. He's going to need to accept what he has done and if you, his mentor, go to him doubting his actions, doubting your actions, it's going to make it a hundred times worse."
She turned her back for a minute, fiddling with some papers, so he could have some privacy to change. "Go. You have 10 minutes till I send the guard dogs to retrieve you. Please try and convince him to come back here with you; I'd go with you but I think he'll respond better to one person at the present time. I'll have a nice sedative ready, in case we need it." Bridger gathered her in a quick embrace, thanking her with his smile and left. Kristin went into her office, shut the door, drew the blind and sat down to have a good cry.
Three hours had passed before Kristin, juggling the package and tray of food she was holding, opened the door of Lucas' cabin slowly, with trepidation, not knowing what she would find. She really hadn't expected the Captain to return but hope springs eternal. To her relief, both occupants were in full snore, Bridger slouched in a chair and Lucas sprawled on the bed. She put the tray on the desk but wasn't quite sure what to do with the package. It would need some explaining and she wasn't sure how Lucas would react to the story, but she hoped it would help his mental state especially after glancing at the computer screen, seeing the words that he had typed earlier.
"Kristin?"
The sleepy voice startled her and she turned to see Lucas rubbing his eyes as he struggled to a sitting position. With a glance at the still sleeping Bridger, she sat on the edge of the bed. "I heard what happened" she stated tentatively, wondering what the Captain had said, if they had a chance to talk.
He wouldn't meet her eyes. "Do you hate me," he asked in a low, forlorn voice.
"Oh, honey, of course not !" Kristin put her arm around him, pulling him close, and he relaxed against her. "It must have been frightening for you. You were very brave, wanting to protect the Captain."
"I didn't mean to kill him, I just squeezed the trigger and the next thing I knew, there was blood and a body on the ground. I couldn't let him hurt the Captain. He said he only wanted to send a message, he said he wasn't going to kill any one but I was afraid he wouldn't stop till it was too late." The teen let out a tired sigh. "I've really made a mess of things. I guess there won't be any treaty now."
"Don't worry, I've spoken to the Ambassador and she's going to take care of everything. There's a lot of embarrassment on both sides and the Ambassador says that both the Governor and the Ellice are trying to be more flexible." She rubbed his leg softly and nodded her head to the package she had placed on the desk. "Some one named Mikki delivered that package to the launch. It's a little rumpled because security insisted on checking it out."
Lucas tensed against her, and blanched at the name.. "The man I shot, he was Mikki's brother."
"It's all right, Mikki explained everything to me. Yes, that was his brother but they haven't spoken in two years. His name was Tomachi and he was expelled from the Ellice for his radical views. He supported Ellice domination, that any one who wasn't part of the Ellice should be driven from the islands. Mikki didn't support his brother and his radical views."
Kristin unwrapped her arm from around Lucas and stood slowly as Lucas shifted into a sitting position. She picked up the package and brought it back to the bed. Lucas eyed it suspiciously. "Relax. Mikki has no ill feelings towards you. In fact, he was most apologetic and seemed quite worried about you and the Captain. He tried to explain this all to Nathan but he was in too big of a hurry to get back to the seaQuest." She watched as Lucas slowly pulled away at the brown paper wrapping to reveal a small wooden box with four small drawers and intricate carvings. "It's called a 'twasada', a life chest. Every Ellice receives one when they are born, usually from a godparent, to put in special mementos from their life, remembrances of events that were meaningful in one's life . This one was hand carved for Tomachi and Mikki sent it for you. He wants you to know it wasn't your fault, that you did nothing wrong. Tomachi was a dangerous man, started fires to drive out people who didn't agree with him, he's even a suspect in several murder."
Bridger chose this moment to yawn quite nosily which made both Lucas and Kristin jump. "Oh, sorry!" he said guiltily and stretched his arms, yawning again, wincing from the pain. "I'm getting too old to sleep in chairs." Standing, he arched his back and then sat on the bed on the other side of Lucas, giving Kristin a look, which made her wonder how long he had actually been awake. "How are you ?"
"I think I'll be all right...after awhile," the teen replied quietly. He picked up the box gingerly, carried it to his locker and pushed it towards the back. Sitting down again in the middle, he leaned against Kristin's shoulder as her arm wrapped around his back again. "It seems that everyone is prepared to forgive me. But I don't know if I'm ready to forgive myself. A living human being is now dead because of me."
Bridger put a hand on the boy's leg. "No, you shot at someone who was hurting a friend of yours and, by accident, you killed that person. It was a mistake. One morning, you'll wake up and you'll be able to move on with your life until the next mistake. It's called growing up." Now it was Kristin's turn to give him a look of warning and he shrugged his shoulders at her. There wasn't much more for him to say, there weren't any magic words to make things better. The healing would take time, on a day to day basis.
They all sat back against the wall lost in their private thoughts, Lucas in the middle, cozy and comfortable between the two people who meant the most to him in his life. His mind was still troubled and he knew the nightmares would come in the middle of the night. He would second guess himself until he took his last breath but he felt relieved. He knew, in his heart, he had done a terrible thing that would haunt him for the rest of his life but he had been forgiven by the others. They saw his actions as unavoidable and accepted them, still valued him. "But I still killed somebody,"he said sadly, full of regret.
The End