"I love painting" the painter said to his wife, a hedgehog. He was also a hedgehog, but an artist hedgehog. She was not an artist hedgehog, but a beautiful one who had a beautiful hedgehog laugh that kind of sounded like a beautiful bird but she was a hedgehog.
"I know darling" his hedgehog wife said. "I know you love painting because I love you. You are the greatest painter in the world." She laughed her bird-hedgehog hybrid laugh.
"I also take photos." Hedhehod painter said
"Yes, and you are the best at that too. You were the one who took a picture of Mona Lisa and it is the most popular photo in the world. Every man aspired to be like you and every woman wants to be with you, but you are with me, because you are my husband."
"Yes I am your husband, and you know why I know that? Because I am your wife. We are married and in love. I am in love with your painting abilities And you are in love with my beauty and we make the persfect pare. We are like bonnie and clyde if we bonnie and clyde were a painter and a beautiful person and also hedeghods because we're are headheogs.
SUDDENLY A CAT THAT WAS EATING A LEMON SNEAKS INTO THE HOUSE AND STEALS ONE OF THE PAINTERS PAINTINGS WHICH WAS REALLY IMPORTANT TO HIM BECAUSE IT WAS A SELF PORTRAIT AND HE THOUGHT HE WAS THE SECOND MOST BEAUTIFUL HEDGEHOD IN THE WORLD (AFTER HIS BEAUTIFUL HEDGEHOG WIFE)
"oh no, my painting! The painting I did with my own hedgehog fingers! The painting that I spent half my hedgehog life on because hedgehogs only live 5 years and I have spent 2 and a half years on that painting! What will I do!"
"darling, don't worry your little artist hands and wipe your little artists eyes. Your second cousin removed can help us. He can do anything!"
"But, my beautiful hedgehog wife, i do not like sonic and do not want his help. There is a reason is a SECOND cousin. Because he SUCKS. He is the reason why SUCKS and SECOND start with an S. Because they mean the same thing. That is also why his name is sonic. Sonic Sucks Second. Do you understand?"
"I do precious hedgehog painter husband, but that painting is worth 69 billion dollars. That is a lot of dollars."
Artist hedgehog wiped away a tear. "U rite" he said. "I made that painting with my hedgehog spikes, something any other artists cannot do because they are human and they do not have spikes," he sat up because he had been sitting in a large wooden chair which was his artist chair that only he, the artist, was allowed to sit in. It's not that anyone who wasn't him that sat in the chair would suffer something but that there was an understanding that the wooden chair was the artist's chair and so everyone respected him because he was a great artist.