So...it's Chrisney Week, everybody! :D
It's a Saturday afternoon and Chris wanted to spend time with Courtney so he decides he's going to go with her and it turns out Courtney needs to go to the library to do some research and Chris gets bored and wants to leave. They argue and Chris gets bored and this results in Courtney and Chris getting kicked out of the library and Courtney getting pissed.
I got the prompt from I'll Cover Angel and Collins, so I'm dedicating this fic to her. She writes epic Chrisney. Check 'em out.
DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN TOTAL DRAMA.
It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon. The sun was still shining, birds were chirping, and a warm afternoon breeze blew past the trees.
Needless to say, Chris McLean was bored as hell.
Seriously, nothing was fun anymore. He watched all the DVDs in his TV room (most of which belonged to Chef, so they were just a bunch of cheesy romantic comedies), he invited a bunch of hot girls over to hang out in his hot tub (and they all ended up braiding each other's hair and doing pedicures, ergo kicking Chris out of his own room for an hour), and he even played multiple sports with Chef (which caused a bunch of bruises to appear, tainting his gorgeous skin), all in one day.
Now, there wasn't really anything to do. The host was stretched lazily on one of the chairs overlooking the crystal-blue swimming pool. He stirred the drink that Chef whipped up for him with his straw and took a sip. Hmm...it was surprisingly good, despite the fact that it was...well, created by Chef.
"Hey, Chef?" Chris yelled.
The burly cook submerged from his spot in the pool, wearing goggles. "What?" Chef yelled back.
"What did you put in this?" The host gestured at his drink, asking mostly out of boredom and nothing else. Chef glanced at the drink, snickered loudly, and dived back into the pool without answering.
The dark-haired man frowned, eyeing his drink suspiciously. Shrugging, he continued to drink and...
SPLAT! One of the adorable little birdies (namely an adorable little pigeon) took a dump directly on his chest.
Chris glared at the vermin, which seemed to be laughing at him from his position in the sky. Brushing the shit from his chest away, he tried to relax again, basking in the light of the sun.
Two seconds later, it began to drizzle. Then rain. Then, out of nowhere, it suddenly began to hail.
"That's it!" Chris shouted, leaping up from his chair and setting the weird concoction down. "I am so out of here!"
Chris stormed off, took an hour long shower, and found himself hanging out in his couch a few seconds later.
"Hmm...let's see," the host muttered, tapping away on his phone. "Who can I call? Barry, Carrie, Harold...HAROLD? Why do I even have that loser's number in here?" Angrily, Chris deleted it, and continued looking for someone to disturb. "Brittany...hmm, I wonder if she still likes me? Nah, I don't think she'd want me to call her now...hmm, Courtney? I don't remember asking for her number...oh, what the hell. She's real feisty, anyway."
Chris pressed the 'call' button, and he pressed his ear on the phone, waiting for the prep to answer.
"Ughh...what!" a female voice snapped. The voice sounded strange, as if someone wanted to shout, but couldn't.
"Courtney?" Chris said, his eyes lighting up despite himself. "Hi, this is Chris. You know, your host from Total Dra—"
"I know this is Chris," Courtney interrupted, sounding irritated. "I have caller ID, you know! What do you want?"
Chris cleared his throat. "Well, I've been pretty bored today..."
"Keep talking," Courtney said, sounding distracted.
"Can I come over to your place and hang out? I mean, I would've called someone else, like Lindsay, but you're kind of hot, too, so can I?"
"Excuse me?" Courtney laughed disbelievingly. "Of course not! And anyway, I'm not even at home. I'm in the public library, doing some research on my paper about wonderful historical figures." Courtney paused, and added, "I'm doing my paper on myself, of course. The world is lucky to have me, and I will make history by becoming the best corporate lawyer in all of—"
"Hang on," Chris cut in. "Which public library is this?"
"The one near the Drama mall, right in the middle of that pet shop and Starbucks. But, Chris—"
"I'll be right there, Court. See ya!" And without another word, the host pressed the 'end' button and ran to his room.
It was time for some actual fun to begin.
Behind a giant wall of stacked books sat the former CIT herself, diligently writing useful notes.
Chris entered the library and immediately got shushed by the head librarian (an old lady in a seriously unflattering dress) for accidentally slamming the door.
He immediately noticed the prep (it was kind of hard not to, since she was the only one surrounded by enough books to serve as a fort in a military) and headed towards her.
Courtney didn't notice him; she was too engrossed in her studies. She hardly even looked up when Chris took the seat right next to her.
"Hi, Courtney," Chris said in his normal voice, eliciting a startled yelp from the brunette.
"Shh!" the librarian snapped, glaring at them from her glasses. "Pipe down!"
Chris rolled his eyes at her and turned back to the infuriated girl. "So, what's up, sexy?"
"Sexy?" Courtney repeated, sounding insulted. "Since when was it established that you can refer to me as, and I quote, sexy?"
"Since I caught a glimpse of your cute little rack in one of the swimming challenges," the host responded lazily, playing with a loose strand of her brown hair.
"Stop it!" she snapped, slapping his hand away from her head. "And...cute little rack? What does that even mean?"
Chris paused, as if he was actually thinking about it. "It means...well, it means I'd be willing to do you, sweetheart. But not as much as...um, Lindsay, who is obviously smoking hot. Or maybe that Brittany chick, who is—"
"EW!" Courtney's voice rose, and she stood from her seat. "Pervert!"
"Quiet!" the librarian snapped, before burying her head in one of the romance novels that she stashed in there (fulfilling her ho-hum love life, no doubt).
Courtney lowered her voice. "I'm going to ask you nicely, Chris. Go to hell."
"Real nice, hot stuff," Chris said with a smirk.
"I'm not kidding!" Courtney hissed. "This research paper is due tomorrow, and I still have to look for forty other brilliant women from history and prove why I'm so much better than them!"
"Sounds like fun," the host said dryly. "But you know what's more fun? Hanging out in a hot tub. Really cools you down, doesn't it?"
"Obviously not, since it's a hot tub." The brunette rolled her eyes. "Look, if you leave me alone, I promise to hang out with you in the next...three weeks or so."
"Three weeks?" Chris yelled, nearly losing it. "What, you think I'm some kind of an idiot or something? Only Chris McLean asks people to wait three weeks!"
"ENOUGH!" the librarian snapped, slamming her gnarled hands on the counter. "Courtney, I expected more out of you, young lady! Why must you do your shameless flirting in my library?"
"What?" Courtney sputtered. "But I wasn't—I didn't—"
"And you," the librarian said, turning to Chris. "Don't you think that you're too old to be hitting on teenage girls? For God's sake, get a life, mister!"
"Says the lady who gets turned on by paperbacks!" Chris shot back.
"I fucking hate you," Courtney snapped. "Now I'm banned to go into the library for a year! How the hell am I going to finish my research paper?"
Needless to say, they were kicked out of the public library.
"I could help you," Chris offered lamely. For all it's worth, he did feel bad.
That old lady just kicked him in the balls, which would make anyone feel bad. (Who knew that she had it in her?)
"Go to hell." Courtney stood. "I need to get home anyway."
"I'll drive you." Chris stood up as well. It was pretty dark, and the rain was really pouring now.
The former CIT scowled, but didn't object. Together, they ran to his car in the library parking lot.
The ride to Courtney's house was pretty quiet. Chris tried to ease the mood by playing some radio, but Courtney flicked it off every time he did.
The car stopped in front of Courtney's plain, two-story house. "Thanks for the ride," Courtney muttered. "Asshole."
"Don't mention it, Court," Chris said, grinning. Then he added, "You know, I think you totally deserve to be the subject of your research paper."
Courtney glanced at him warily. "Oh?"
"Yeah." Chris smirked. "There's one thing that all those ladies from the past weren't able to accomplish."
"And that is..." Courtney was getting impatient.
"None of them were able to turn on Chris McLean," Chris said, "and you managed to do it. Congrats, Courtney."
Courtney's eyebrows lifted. "Well...you finally said something that may be considered as decent." She paused, and reverted back to her snotty attitude. "And I just decided that I want to be allowed full access to that hot tub that you talk so much about."
Chris grinned. "Wanna go now?"
Courtney smiled. "Both my parents are in a business trip, so fine. But this is only because of the convenience, and nothing else, got it?"
"Yes, ma'am," Chris said, loving the dominant role she was taking. It definitely turned him on.
"And you will help me with my research paper, yes?"
"Anything you want, Court." And the pair drove off to Chris's house.
"Why are you kicking me out?" Chef grumbled.
"Relax, Chef, it's only for tonight," Chris said with a grin. "You can hang out in a park bench or whatever, and you can come back tomorrow just in time to cook me breakfast!"
Chef glared at Chris. "Whatever, pretty boy," he grunted. Without another word, the big man shuffled out of Chris's house and started his white van. Chris watched him drive away.
"Coast is clear, babe," Chris whispered.
Courtney got out of the car. "You better make this worth my time," she said haughtily, "or else I'll have my revenge."
"Sure, Court, sure," Chris said, grinning.
"Oh, crap!" Courtney said suddenly. "I don't have a swimsuit with me! How can I get into the hot tub?"
Chris's grin spread wider. "It's just a suggestion, sweetheart," he began, "but ever tried skinny-dipping?"
Yeah, their night was spent in cold, pouring rain, and Chris earned a hand-shaped mark on his cheek. But to hang out with that deliciously irritating CIT, Chris decided that it was worth it.
So...how's that for a Chrisney Week? If you have the time, please review, folks.