Nothing Like Father
By Jetsir
People seem to think that everything I do has some ulterior motive to it. That everything I do is to make sure that I'm not like my dad.
I can understand that. You don't exactly have to be in my family's inner circle to know what my dad did when he was my age, and the people he associated himself with. Even though I don't know the gritty details, I know the gist of what he did, and it thoroughly disgusts me.
How I feel about my dad's past really affects how I feel about him in the present, no matter how much I tell myself he's a changed man and see that it's true. This has created a lot of tension between us, and we don't connect anymore like we used to when I was younger, before I found out about the mark on his arm.
We barely even talk anymore.
This strain in our relationship is easy to see. Even Dad and I can acknowledge it's there, and trust me, we've had several talks about it. It seems as if we'll probably never go back to normal, and it kills Dad as much as it kills me.
As this tension gets picked up by more and more people, general assumptions are made. People begin to dissect my behavior, my style choices, my friends, and soon every little thing I do is because I don't want to be like my dad.
When I was 15, I dyed my hair black with a potion that I read about in my textbook. Then I performed a charm that temporarily changed my eye color to a shocking blue. When I came home for the Christmas holiday, Mum pulled me aside and told me that it was understandable if I was distancing myself from my dad, but that I didn't have to be so rebellious and hurtful about it by changing what made me look so much like him.
During my sixth year I once partnered with Albus Potter for a Potions project. My teacher talked to me after class saying that I shouldn't change myself for the sake of others, and that the only person whose opinion matters is my own.
In the beginning of my seventh year I began dating Rose Weasley. As soon as he found out, Dad sent me an owl and told me that I shouldn't do things that I don't want to do just to prove I'm not him. That I just have to be myself.
But that's the thing, I am being myself!
I dyed my hair and changed my eyes because it looked cool.
I partnered with Albus because he's brilliant in Potions and my own usual partner wasn't in class because of a quidditch injury.
I went out with (am still going out with) Rose Weasley because... well, have you ever had a real, in-depth conversation with Rose Weasley? Then you know why.
So yes, my dad and I don't have the best relationship in the world. And yes, I do do things that seem to be blatant deviations from the kind of person my father is/was. But no, I don't do these things in attempt to not be like my father.
I could care less what others think of me. I know who I am. I know who I want to be. I'm not trying to prove myself to anyone or make a point about anything.
I'm nothing like my dad, but it's not because I try to be different from him.
It's just who I am.
A/N: I've been pumping out lots of oneshots lately. This series has really put me in a writing mood. Sorry it's so short. And crappy. Can't forget that...