Dear Tim,

I noticed the pants you're wearing are new, just like in that movie with Jackie Chan. That's not the point. The point is, those $700 pants you're wearing make your ass look fine.

Sincerely,

YnoT?

Timothy McGee stared in confusion at his monitor. The elevator dinged, signalizing the opening of elevator doors, Tim noted silently.

"McGee, what is up?" that was Ziva's voice. Clearly concerned for Tim's lack of response when she entered. They were the only two in the team that had arrived. When Tim didn't answer, Ziva asked her question once more. Tim looked up at her and indicated his computer screen. Sighing and sensing Tim wasn't about to read it out loud, the Mossad officer walked around the mini wall between them to hover over his shoulder. She skimmed the email and laughed, finding it funny. McGee did not think so, obviously. He looked bewildered and utterly lost. "What, McGee? Worried about a stalker?" joked Ziva. However, Tim's reaction worried her that he hadn't figured out who sent the email.

"What if I really have a stalker, Ziva? No one has seen me today aside from you," Tim commented worriedly. Maybe he should show the email to Tony or Gibbs. Ziva rolled her eyes languidly and walked to her desk, setting her bag on the floor. She flicked on her piece of technology and waited for it to boot up. The elevator dinged once more while McGee was trying to decipher the email when he heard the familiar patter of Tony's feet stepping along the plush carpet. A cup of coffee was placed on Tim's desk and he thanked Tony on auto-pilot. Tim didn't see Tony's reaction but he assumed it was amused as Tony usual was.

"It's just like that movie-" began Tony.

"Tony, drip it," Ziva snapped irritably.

"You mean zip it," corrected Tony. "You had this conversation with Ducky already…" Tony rolled his eyes and glanced at McGee.

"Hey McGeek, what's wrong with you?" inquired the ever pushy brunette.

"I have a stalker," replied the worried brunette. Tony quirked a brow.

"Oh, what's his name?" he asked cheerfully. Tim gave the other a questioningly suspicious glance before answering.

"He calls himself 'YnoT.'" answered McGee. Tony made his face carefully blank.

"That's a stupid name," he replied. Ziva masked a snort as a painful sneeze. Tony gave a glare before the firm voice of Gibbs snapped them out of their silence.

"Gear up!" he yelled.

--

The case was closed. It had only taken a week. The very same week that McGee had tried to decipher the sender of the email. He'd showed it to Gibbs who had grinned like he knew something Tim did not and walked away. He had finally figured it out and, when he had a rough idea of who it was, Tim had traced the email ring to Tony's home laptop. So, before everyone came in for the day (aside from Abby who came early for some unknown reason), Tim decided to confront 'YnoT'. He sat at his desk playing Solitaire and only looked away from the electric card game when the elevator dinged. It was Tony. Just the person he wanted to see. Tim rose from his chair and waited for Tony to get comfortable.

"I know it was you," he said quietly. Tony looked up and scoffed, tilting his head to the side.

"What are you talking about?" DiNozzo asked in a tone one would use when asking 'Are You Stupid?' Tim glared at the other brunette and he approached his desk, slamming his hands down to look eye-to-eye with Anthony DiNozzo.

"Don't play stupid with me, Tony," McGee scolded, trying his best to look intimidating. Tony rolled his eyes.

"I don't know what you're talking about. Unless it's like in that movie with Johnny Depp where the people suspect him of something. The Secret Window. I'm sure you've heard of it," Tony rambled.

"Even if I didn't get it from the movie reference in the stupid email or the stupid 'nickname'… Oh, I was so stupid!" Timothy berated himself. "Anyways, I should have got it from your stupid behaviour, which wasn't stupid at all which was the problem because you should've been stupid if it wasn't you but you weren't so it was!" Tony's jaw dropped and a look of confusion made home on his face.

"In English, Probie," Tony said, treating the towering brunette like he was an idiot.

"You sent me that stupid email, Tony!" accused the Probie that wasn't Gibbs. Tony laughed and pointed at himself with all of his fingers.

"Me?" he asked, exasperated. "Probie, you need to get your facts checked!"

Tim glowered. "I traced the email to your home laptop," emphasized the victimized brunette. Tony's face was an ashen color.

"Pr-Probie, you have it all wrong!" Tony exclaimed, standing to defend himself verbally. He walked around the desk to glare down McGee the Probie. They glared at each other, neither hearing the ding of the elevator in their fight nor the double sets of footsteps.

"Then explain it, Tony," Tim demanded, folding his arms across his chest. Tony smirked and unwound Tim's arms, pushing him against the desk. Tony pressed his lips to Tim's ear and whispered, his hand slithering down to grab Tim's crotch through his clothes,

"Why should I explain when I can just," his hand on McGee's crotch squeezed, "show you?" purred the currently dominating brunette.

Tim knew his face was flushed when Tony blew into his ear and walked around to sit at his desk while the other, chubbier agent stood in embarrassed shock, staring at Abby and Ziva who he just noticed.

"Oh," Tony said, looking up, "Heya Abs, hi Ziva." He said this as if the scene with Timmy hadn't just happened. Skin-on-skin contact them rang through the awkwardly silent room and the three turned their gaze on McGee who had just introduced the palm of his hand to his face. He walked back to his desk in a daze, his palm still chattering avidly with his nose. His hand slid from his face when he slumped into his seat, falling into his lap.

"McGee, are you alright?" inquired Ziva as she walked to her desk.

"I'm fine," he mumbled automatically.

"You're all red," mocked Tony.

Not noticing who spoke, Tim answered with, "I'm fine," once again. He answered the same when Abby asked her question.

"You do not seem 'fine'," voiced Ziva after a few moments of silence.

"I'm fine," persisted Timmy automatically. He got three pairs of doubtful glances but he paid them no mind, his own reeling with the events that had just come to pass. Even as the others started showing up, Tim continued to remain on autopilot.

"Team," greeted their fearless leader. Tony, Ziva, and Abby (why she still remained was beyond any of them) greeted him back and McGee raised his eyes, acknowledging his boss. "You alright, McGee?" Gibbs glanced at Tim briefly.

"Fine, Boss," replied the comatose brunette.

"Alright," Gibbs responded. "Officer David, get the keys, DiNozzo, call Duck, McGee, get the gear," ordered the boss. Ziva was gone before Gibbs could change his mind about the danger he was possibly placing his agents in and Tony picked up the phone, dialing Ducky's extension number. Tim, however, continued to sit and stare. "McGee, move!" Gibbs scolded. Tony glanced over while the phone was ringing in his ear. When Probie failed to respond, Gibbs slammed his hand on the brunette's desk, looking him as close to the eye that h e could, due to the fact that McGee was staring blankly at his keyboard. "Are you alright, McGee?"

"I'm fine Boss," was the automatic, monotonous reply from Probie.

"No, McGee, you're not. You'll sit out of this one then," Gibbs ordered.

"I'm fine," was the monotonous repeat.

Gibbs looked at his Probie for a moment before glancing at Tony. "DiNozzo, scratch that call to Ducky and call Ziva back up here," the older man ordered.

"On it Boss," Tony said, hanging up.

"I'm fine," repeated Probie. Tony was getting concerned. Why had McGee reacted like this? He was supposed to flirt back, dammit!! "I'm fine…" It became more urgent but still in monotone. "I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine…" It was whispered with fervor, in quick succession that warranted concerned looks from his boss and Tony.

"Hey, Ziva, get up here. McGee is having a meltdown here, Boss wants-"

"I said I'm FINE!" exclaimed McGee, bursting to his feet, sending his chair flying backwards, toppling to the ground with a clatter.

"McGee, calm- Oh, Ziva thank god!" Tony cried in elation as Ziva came bursting from the stairwell her gun ready as she looked around. McGee's face was red with rage and he was shaking, his hands in fists at his side. McGee set his eyes on Ziva, holding her gun, watching him. Oh, so she thought he was the threat. He glared in annoyance, or maybe it was his anger, and pulled out his gun which prompted Gibbs and Tony to do the same. Three guns were turned on him while Abby stared on in shock. "McGee, put the gun down," Tony said softly, trying to baby McGee into surrendering.

"Shut up Tony," McGee growled, pointing his gun at innocent bystanders. Poor suckers.

"McGee," Ziva coaxed, "what do you want?" McGee glared at her darkly. "We will give it to you if you put the gun down." McGee closed his eyes and lowered the gun. "Now, what-"

"Shut up, David," McGee spat, "no one asked you."

"McGee," Gibbs sighed in exasperation. He turned to the other two members of his team as well as Abby. "What happened to make him snap?" Both of the females turned their gazes to Tony who held his hands up in surrender.

"How the hell was I supposed to know he was going to react like that? God, he was supposed to flirt back!" he hissed at them, taking extra care to make sure Timmy didn't hear them. Tim was eyeing them suspiciously. A small smile played on Gibbs' lips, receiving three questioning glances from the three surrounding him. Gibbs knew something they didn't and it was annoying as hell. They didn't push, however, and instead began to figure out what to do.

"Gibbs?" Abby squeaked.

"Abs, tell him you love him," Gibbs ordered.

"But Gibbs, I-"

"He's like a brother, I know Abs, just do it!" Gibbs sighed in exasperation. Abby looked at the three of them and turned to McGee, walking hesitantly towards McGee.

"Timmy, I love you," she whispered hesitantly. "I do love you."

Tim fixed her with a thoughtful glance and Tony sulked off in the corner as he waited for McGee's heartfelt confession of love towards the forensic scientist.

"I don't want your love," McGee snapped. The word 'bitch' went unsaid because, even in anger, McGee is nice enough to just think the insult. Everyone heard the silent curse at Abby anyways, just because.

"Abs," Gibbs called. The black haired woman stumbled away to Gibbs' side. "McGee, who do you want?" he asked, aiming for a verbal or non-verbal confession. Gibbs followed Tim's green eyes with his and watched as they landed on the sulking DiNozzo, as did Ziva's eyes. Both shared silent knowing glances. McGee looked away to glare at Gibbs just before Tony looked up, wondering what had cause such an even more awkward silence to befall them.

Gibbs and Ziva fixed the brunette with equally intimidating stares to which he responded with a confused look. Ziva jerked her gun subtly in Tim's direction and Tony stared at her, wide-eyed. Well, since his stupid stunt that freaked McGee out, Gibbs (he probably already knew, the bastard), Ziva, and Abby knew of his MAN-crush on McGee. And now they wanted him to do something about the blasted psycho?! He knew he would give in eventually, but he was not going without a fight. He shook his head and Ziva motioned again. He glared and felt the evil glare of Gibbs bore into his skull and cringed, mentally going through all the techniques he could to calm Timmy down. He finally settled on one and prayed to Gibbs (yes, Gibbs was much better than God) and stepped forward, dropping his gun. He kicked it so it settled under his vacated desk. He stepped slowly forward, feeling the tense eyes of his team, Abby, and the poor people caught in the crossfire of Tim's anger. At Tony's surrender, Tim dropped his gun hesitantly. In long, painstakingly slow strides, Tony encroached on Tim's personal space.

"Tony…" Tim warned, stepping away from the man invading his bubble. Tony followed and his hands shot out, gripping the collar of the man that matched his height. He felt the tension rise as he tugged the psycho brunette forward, bringing their lips together. And he knew they won because he felt Tim melt in his arms. Both sets of eyes closed in content. Ziva let out a tense sigh.

"I think we will be alright for the moment, Gibbs," she whispered.

"Abs, go bring me Director Sheppard," Gibbs ordered. Abby nodded and ran off up the stairs.

The next Monday found Timothy McGee and Anthony DiNozzo sitting in Interrogation Room 1 with Tim's therapist. Tony was only there for the first day to explain the happenings. When he was asked to leave he stood, kissing Tim's temple.

"Love you," Tony whispered.

"Back at you," Timmy whispered back.

"Oh, McGee, you're back." Ziva sounded shocked that he was sitting at his desk, typing away like nobody's business. "How was therapy?"

"Fine," he replied. Ziva tensed; that word was trouble for them. "It was alright, Ziva," he said trying to calm her. She nodded slightly.

"Where is Gibbs? And Tony?" asked the brunette woman.

"Gibbs is with Director Sheppard," Tim replied. "Tony? I've no idea."

"I'm here!" rang the voice of one Anthony DiNozzo from the direction of the elevators. Tim stopped typing and looked up. Gibbs was walking out next to the DiNozzo as they made their way towards Ziva and McGee. "Coffee," Tony clarified, setting the four cups of coffee on his desk. Gibbs took his and walked back to the elevator, going down apparently. Ziva took hers as well as she hadn't sat down yet and Tony carried his over to his lover. He set the cup down and leaned down, kissing his brunette lover's temple.

"'Morning Tony," Tim replied turning his head to face the other. He got a light peck on the lips and Ziva mock-groaned.

"'Morning Timmy," Tony purred, licking Tim's nose playfully. A light pink shade dusted McGee's cheeks. Tim took his turn to kiss Tony lightly.

"Thanks for the coffee, Love," Tim replied. "I love you, Tony."

Tony winked, aching to try out the new nickname he came up for his Probie lover. "I love you more, McGorgeous."