Okay, so I've always wondered what would happen between Bella and Edward when it's Bella's "time of the month". Lol, so this is my version. Now keep in mind that I know some things won't make perfect sense but be reasonable because I wrote this in about two seconds and it's supposed to be funny, not logical. Like the fact that this is based during Eclipse, so Bella would have had her period around Edward before and yada, yada, yada…yeah, I know!

So anyways, originally this was going to be a one-shot, but I guess a two-shot is fine…it shouldn't be any longer. -shrugs-

Don't worry, I won't forget about The Beginning of the End!

Disclaimer: "Umm, who are you?"… "well we're the FBI"….. "And you're here because…?"… "Because you stole Stephanie Meyer's story Twilight!"….. "No I didn't...I openly stated that I DON'T OWN IT!…So now what…Bitch?"…-they walk away with their head down- Pfft! Now that's a disclaimer!

CH. 1!!

Edward's POV

Something was seriously wrong with Bella. She has had a short fuse all morning. She woke up and told me that her stomach hurt before rushing to the bathroom. I had offered to take her by Carlisle but she only yelled at me. She was now in her room getting her things and herself ready, and I was downstairs in her kitchen, fixing her breakfast, as usual. I had poured her a bowl of cereal and a glass of orange juice. She would be proud, I always made her a big breakfast and she yells me for it. Now, however, I did it right!

"Edward of all the days to not make me a big breakfast, you choose today." I guess not.

"But Bella," I began, determined to turn this morning around, "you never want me to fix you a big breakfast."

"Yeah, well, obviously today is an exception. Whatever, the cereal is fine." she said taking the bowl in her hand and beginning to eat. I just sat there perplexed at the way the morning was going. I shook my head and inhaled only to have a different, unsual smell enter my nostrils. The smell was coming from Bella.

"Uhh Bella? Are you wearing a new perfume or something? It smells like--like fake flower scent trying to hide another smell. That is seriously weird, that smell I mean." I stopped and looked at Bella. She had a uncanny expression on her face as if trying to decided whether she should cry or yell. She settled on yelling.

"EDWARD CULLEN! You are the most insensitive person I have ever known! I'm sorry that I do not smell as perfect as you want me to but not everyone can be a perfect vampire like you! Now if you are going to take me to school fine, but only if you can stand having a simple human in the car!" and with that she stood up and grabbed her bag off the floor and stomped out of the house. I followed her quickly so that she could lock up. When she did she plodded away from me towards my Volvo. She had not even made it half way there before she tripped.

I ran, full speed, to catch her before she cracked her pretty little head open.

"Are you okay Bella?" I asked her.

"I'm fine thank you!" she said, very meanly if I may add. Then, and I cannot believe it, she cried. She cried and cried and cried and cried.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I was very worried about her. She had been acting weird all morning.

"I'm so s- s- sorry Edward! I've been such a b -b- bitch all morning!" I was repelled that she would ever say something like that about herself.

"Bella! Why would you say something like that?"

"Because it's true! I'm such a h- h- horrible girlfriend! You must hate me!" she wailed.

"Bella! Are you okay? Here, let me take you to see Carlisle" her eyes grew wide.

"No! Edward listen, I'm fine!" I looked at her warily but decided to let it go.

For now.

We drove to school in silence and as I walked her to class it was the same. It was quiet and tense between us during classes; quiet for Bella because she didn't want to start acting weird again, tense for me because I didn't want her to freak out again. It was actually at lunch when things started to change. Bella and I were waiting in the lunch line to get her some food when she suddenly exclaimed,

"Oh! There she is! Wait just one moment Edward!" and she ran off to none other than Lauren.

I was too shocked by her sudden urge to talk to Lauren that I forgot to listen! Damn! I wanted to know what was wrong with her.

"…so do you have one? Please?" I tuned in to Lauren's thought's…which were not so nice.

I really shouldn't give it to her. It's what she gets…she should have been more prepared. Stupid, Little Miss Prefect. Whatever, even I'm not that heartless.---Lauren

Damn! She thought of everything but what she was going to give Bella! The pass of whatever it was, was too sly for me to see what it was and the next thing I knew, Bella was out the cafeteria door. I frowned, Bella really trusted Lauren over me?! I purchased Bella's food and sat down at our usual table with Alice and the rest of Bella's friends who weren't there yet.

"What's wrong Edward? Actually never mind, I know what's wrong. You should really butt out, it isn't any of your business." I raised my eyebrows at Alice.

"Isn't any of my business? Everything about her is my business! So what, do you know?"

"No" she answered simply. My jaw almost dropped.

"No?"

"No"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes"

"B-b-but why?" I asked incredulously.

"Because if I look, and you find out, I don't want Bella angry with me. Besides," she shrugged, "I saw her telling me later but I broke the vision before I heard. I want it to be a surprise!" she clapped her hands together in joy. I stared at her.

"Hey guys! How are you Alice?" Bella said. I was so preoccupied with Alice's new found joy of surprises that I didn't even hear her approaching.

"Fine, you?" Alice politely asked.

"A lot better than earlier" Bella responded, rolling eyes and sighing.

"Hey guys, what's up?" I nodded to Angela, still preoccupied with Bella.

"Hi Ang" Alice replied.

"Hey Angela!" Bella said happily.

I stared at her but turned away before she could notice.

The rest of school went by normally. Bella and I went to our next classes and we were able to talk again. I, however, was not fooled. I will find out what was wrong with her.

I will.

So yeah…there you go chapter one of two. I don't think it was very good…just something to keep me busy during these damn finals! Grr! Ha, so I just wrote this while I'm supposed to be doing an online final! Ha! I am so failing this one! I think I'll post it when I get home though, don't want to get caught now do I? Lol!

Read and review!