Pumping out fics like there's no tomorrow tonight :)
I'm back, baby! ;)
This one's just a little spoilerish in terms of Hannah and such. It pained me to write her, but it had to be done.
Enjoy.
Disclaimer: I just like manipulating the characters so they kiss all the time :) By no means do I actually own them!
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The Gambler
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He was starting to feel the itch again. It had been a long, long time since he had last felt it. He had become accustomed to not feeling it anymore, so when it pronounced itself again, he was caught off guard and felt a strange panic creeping through him.
He told himself it was okay and that it would pass. It always had before, why wouldn't it now? He told himself that it was just because he was under a lot of stress and that once he settled down a bit he'd feel the itch less and less.
It wasn't as bad as it had once been and so he saw no reason to worry just yet. But still, he knew himself and he knew his addiction. Well enough to know that what may feel like a slow creep right now could overtake his body and mind in a very short amount of time.
It's a compulsion which can't be soothed; it's a path which leads only one way with a very small chance of ever returning the other way. He'd been down there before and he was lucky enough to find his way back; lucky enough to find that light at the end of the tunnel.
But his light was fading again, fading fast.
He felt the itch first in Afghanistan. It was a slight tingle which he tamped down and walked away from. Some of the soldiers in his unit had substituted the plastic poker chips in their game for some real, hard cash. Booth looked at the table and felt a rush he hadn't felt in a long time. He felt something inside of him rear its head, waiting to be satisfied, but he had left that table with a starving beast inside of him, proud of himself for walking away, but confused as to why he felt this way.
Hannah had helped him a little. She was there, always with him. He'd forgotten what it was like to be in an actual relationship. He'd forgotten the amazing feeling you get, waking up, knowing that there's going to be someone there for you no matter what. Not that he hadn't had that feeling in the past few years, it's just that the feeling was usually associated with a kiss with Hannah, whereas with Bones... Well, he had to stop thinking about Bones, didn't he?
Hannah pulled him through Afghanistan and by the time he was called back to DC five months ahead of schedule, he felt like he had his addiction under control again.
And then he saw her.
Bones.
His light.
He had never wanted to roll the dice so bad in his life.
When Hannah came to Washington, he took a gamble and asked her to move in with him. He thought it might calm the beast within him. It didn't. He really did love this woman, so he couldn't understand why the need to gamble had risen in him again. He thought he had passed this stage in his life.
It was late, after a case and he and Bones had been having their usual celebratory drinks, though lately, it had been different. Drinks used to involve more than one beverage and it used to be just the two of them. But now, now it was strange.
Bones would drink her beer with him and drive herself home after they had discussed the basics of the case. Nothing personal was ever revealed, nothing flirtatious passed between them. His light was fading away. Hannah would join them at the bar most times, just as Brennan was leaving. The two women didn't have anything against each other, truth be known, they got along quite well. Brennan just couldn't see Booth in their place with another woman; it would never matter who the woman was.
It was that changeover period, when Bones left and Hannah was arriving that Booth was most honest with himself. He'd watch as the two of them crossed paths and he knew which path he would rather be taking. Watching his blonde beauty walk towards him though, he knew which path he was on.
About 3 months after their return to DC, Booth switched the venue for after case drinks. It was a small, dimly lit pool bar. He knew Bones would stay for one drink and he called Hannah to say he was staying late at work doing paperwork.
That night as Bones walked away, this time not crossing paths with Booth's girlfriend, Booth grabbed a pool cue and slammed a neat hundred dollars down on the table. Opponent after opponent went before him as he won game after game, dollar after dollar. The itch was being scratched, but he knew it would only be temporary.
He returned home in the early hours of the morning and kissed Hannah one last time before breaking up with her. She asked him to sleep on it. He broke her heart and told her he had every night since they had been back in Washington.
He took a gamble 2 months later. Five months since their return, one year exactly from when they had left Washington. He took a gamble and waited by the coffee cart all day to see if she would show up.
At 7pm she walked up to him with a bag of Thai in one hand and a picnic rug in the other. They set up next to the Reflecting Pool and ate with smiles on their faces. The beast within him sighed in content and he suddenly understood.
"You make me a better person."
She looked up from her food with quizzical eyes, "Huh?"
He shrugged and took a bite of his dinner, "A while ago, you told me you couldn't change. But you have changed, Bones. You've changed and I've changed and we've both influenced that part of change in each other. You make me better."
She smiled, "I don't entirely know what that means, but thank you. I think." She went to continue eating, but found that Booth was staring at her, "What?"
"You know, I had a gambling problem before I met you."
"Why do you always feel the need to tell me that?" she asked, incredulously.
"Because," he started, leaning across and pushing a strand of hair behind her ear, "I feel like this is going somewhere."
He saw the flicker of a smile on her face before his lips touched hers, gently prying them apart, asking for permission to kiss her more. They met each other stroke for stroke, each wishing the moment could last for an eternity.
She smiled as she pulled back, "And why do you think this is going somewhere?" she asked, repeating the words she had said so many years ago.
He brushed his lips over hers once more and took the last gamble he would ever have to take, "Because, I know, Bones," he paused, looking in her eyes to makes sure understood him, "I know."
She nodded her head, and dipped to kiss him softly again.
Turning back to their Thai with smiles on their faces, Booth felt the itch leave him and he knew he'd never need to gamble again, he already had all the winnings he could hope for.
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Oh, I'm such a sap :)
Review me.
Em
xx