Author's Note:
Hey! This is my first attempt at published writing of any kind, I aspire to be a comedy writer when I grow up. Hope you laugh and then tell me what you think!
Leslie strode perkily into Ron's office early on a Monday morning.
"Hey." Leslie.
"Comment or question?" Ron asked tiredly.
"Excuse me?"
" I would like to know the re of your disturbance beforehand in order to gauge general reply length." He replied matter-of-factly.
"Who does that?"
"The answer has brown hair, a vintage rifle collection, and six partial DUI's in the state of Michigan."
Leslie thought in earnest for a few moments, "Mike in events planning?"
Ron sighed and rubbed his temples as Leslie continued prattling.
"Anyway," she said " I have a question."
"Ask away"
"How do you feel about community theatre?"
Ron stacked some papers and answered, "The same way I will feel when my cable provider realizes that they have been accidentally giving me free HBO for the last three years. Why?"
Leslie opened her mouth to reply when Tom strolled in, right up to Ron's desk.
"What goes on, Ron-ton?"
"Nothing much, Tomcat."
"That was weak and a little bi-curious, Ron." Tom informed.
"So are you Tom, so are you." Tom rolled his eyes
Leslie huffed impatiently and both men turned to her. Ron spoke first.
"Yes Leslie?"
"I was just going to ask if you would be willing to attend a production at the Pawnee Community Center with me."
Ron looked slightly amused and leaned heavily on his desk with both elbows. In a quiet voice, he uttered the following; " Leslie, I would rather personally set fire to the Arby's I go to when I can't sleep at night, and I am a chronic insomniac who loves sub-par chain food and awkward waitress-customer chats."
Tom's eyebrows rose considerably while Leslie's just knit together in instant confusion.
"Ron, Pawnee doesn't have an Arby's, we never have."
"I know."
A puzzled silence once again engulfed Ron Swanson's small office until Tom broke the silence. "Which community center show were you planning on seeing?"
Leslie perked up, happy to be back on subject. "I have two tickets to The Midnight Journal."
Tom's eyes widened above a giddy smile. "I'm directing The Midnight Journal! That's what I came to tell you two!"
Ron looked as though struggling to stifle a laugh "You are a director?"
So that's it! What did you think? I will continue to add chapters as they arrive. Please review!