This story is just what the title describes: an adaptation to the 'Beauty and the Beast' plot, within an SG-inspired universe! As for genre, it is a bit of everything, from parody-related humour to adventure, drama and of course romance a-plenty. Pairing-wise, it will stick to SG cannon, focusing mostly on Daniel and Vala, since it was their story that struck me as more than vaguely similar to the 'Beauty and the Beast' theme.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own any of the following: "Stargate SG1", any of its characters, Disney's "Beauty and the Beast", any of its characters, any lines you might recognize from the shows...actually, I pretty much don't own anything at all. Hardly decent suing material, right? So please, do not.

Disclaimer no. 2: This is meant to reflect the structure and sometimes lines of the Disney film. Some of the characters' names have been, erm, modified (!) to better reflect the parts they'd play in the BatB-like plot. All similarities are intentional, and the names are not misspellings . The adaptation will become looser after the first two or so chapters, though.

Alright, sorry for the long intro (thanks for bearing with me!), rest assured you will not hear from me until, well, until the end of this chapter at least!

Chapter I

Once upon a time, somewhere at the far edges of the galaxy, a young girl lived in her quiet village, surrounded by peace, joy and the simple love that all her people shared. Yet, although she had everything a heart could desire, she was not content with the serene village life, and had grown up spoiled, rebellious and drawn to riches and luxury. But then, one winter's night, a cruel, gaudily clad woman arrived to their village through the circle of stars and enslaved the peaceful village people. Drawn by the opulence that surrounded the newcomer, the young girl left her safe home and ventured close to the strange woman. The others warned her not to, for no matter how rich the stranger seemed, and how many servants and guards accompanied her, appearances were deceiving, and good did not always come with luxury. She dismissed all those warnings, but the woman revealed herself to be a monstrous being, bent on domination and deceit. The girl tried to escape, but it was too late, for the monster had laid eyes on her, and decided to use her for its own dark purposes. Many years later, when she was finally free from the horrible creature's grasp, the girl—now a young woman with a beautiful body and a scarred soul—found her formerly peaceful world had been completely changed. Ashamed by her past and by the abhorrence of her own people, she steeled her soul and resorted to deceit, theft and manipulation to survive in the unstable galaxy. She became a space pirate, a merciless cheater, a devious swindler always seeking riches and luxury. Unable and unwilling to break the vicious circle of lies and deceit, she was doomed to live a dishonest life for all time. For who could ever learn to love a soulless thief?

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As the chilly morning sun rose, the university campus slowly came to life, truck after noisy garbage truck, shop after heavenly scented coffee shop, biker after dazed biker. In the bedroom of a small house right outside the main campus area, a ruffled mane of hair emerged from behind an ancient tome, and an unsteady hand lazily pushed a crooked pair of glasses back into place. Daniel Jackson stretched his sore muscles and squinted against the bright sunlight filtering through his window.

Daniel, a young man of sharp mind and usually bright disposition, lived in peace in the capital city of his home planet, Earth. A fairly well developed planet, but not overly open-minded when it came to the rest of the universe, Earth tended to focus on political power and influence games, and was utterly oblivious to any other life in the galaxy. While content with his position as a doctorate candidate in archaeology and linguistics, Daniel was growing frustrated with the pettiness of his people. Sometimes it seemed to him that only he and his mother Omaurice—Oma, to friends—Desala could see beyond the little details, into the vaster scheme of the universe.

"Little town, it's a quiet planet… every day, like the one before," he thought to himself as he walked down the main court later that morning, people passing by giving him and his three heavy books strange looks. "Little town, full of little people, waking up to say—"

"Bonjour!" the mailman called from across a wide patch of grass, and Daniel nodded back with a friendly smile. He sighed as the all-too-familiar sight of every single morning greeted him: there was the rolling kebab-stand like always, and his old Ancient civilizations professor from his undergraduate days on his daily jog through campus.

"Good morning, Sir."

"Good morning, Daniel! Where are you off to?" the professor inquired, huffing slightly from his jogging effort.

"The library! See, I just finished translating the record of this Egyptian tablet, and I think it revealed the missing connection between the pyramids of Gizah and th—"

"That's nice," the professor waved a dismissive hand, craning his neck to shout after a passing student. "Marie, your paper! I want it in my office by noon today! And no more excuses this time!"

With a sigh and a shake of his head, Daniel resumed his walk to the library. It was like that every time; whenever he tried to explain his theories, everyone would just space out, or else laugh disdainfully and recommend him to quit pursuing a doctorate and become a science fiction writer. Meanwhile, they were all immersed in their petty conflicts, scientists, politicians, students and all other people alike, refusing to see beyond the limits they had set for themselves.

"There must be more than this provincial life," he murmured to himself as he pushed open a small side door to the history library.

"Ah, Daniel!" the old librarian nodded genially, and Daniel returned an open smile.

"Good morning! I come to return the book I've borrowed."

"Finished already?" The elderly man gave an incredulous laugh.

"Oh, I couldn't put it down! It gives a whole new perspective on the building techniques used to make the pyramids! Nobody could refute this kind of evidence!" He stopped himself from getting carried away, and shrugged with slight embarrassment. "Do you mind if I get one more look at the collection of translations from Haukos?"

"That collection? But you've already read it twice!"

"Well, his work is the most relevant to my thesis—the theories on the identity of the Egyptian gods, the interpretation of the symbols on the pyramids, the possibility of alien life having provided the technology to build the pyramids!"

Daniel was used to the wide-eyed look his opinions got, but he felt grateful for the librarian's understanding nod. When the older man spoke again, it took him totally by surprise.

"Well, if it's that useful to your thesis, you can check it out. No one else has asked to see it in years, anyway."

Daniel's eyes widened. Checking out an ancient library collection was definitely not allowed!

"But, Sir!"

"Don't worry."

"Well, thank you! Thank you very much!"

Carefully holding the newly obtained translations, he made his way back through the now-crowded main court, oblivious to the long looks he was drawing from virtually every girl he passed. They stopped in their tracks, fixing him with hopeful stares, throwing their hair back with long-practiced moves and coyly battling their eyelashes, but never once did he raise his blue eyes from the worn-out pages. As he plodded forward, he did not notice the slightly awed looks of disappointment, nor heard the frustrated sighs of all the young women who had hoped to catch the eye of the ever-distracted archaeologist.

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As Daniel made his way to a quieter area to study his precious articles, a bit of a commotion happened at the other end of the main court. The tumult was caused by the sudden appearance of a tall, shapely woman with bright red hair and blue eyes that had virtually every male in sight struggling for a single glance. Her azure eyes set on Daniel's departing form and a small smile graced her lips, causing all the men around to plaster huge grins on their faces.

"Wow, first place again Hathon!" A smaller, dumpling-shaped girl leapt joyously around the one with the elegant, superior posture. "You're the undisputed beauty queen in this city!

"I know," Hathon replied with a proud smile. She really was the greatest. She could see the confusion on everyone's faces; they surely wondered why a well-off descendant of one of the most famous families in the country wasted her time around the university campus of the city, instead of being in the luxurious government building where she belonged. Well, she had her reasons.

"No other woman stands a chance against you—and no man, for that matter!"

"It's true," she accepted the flattery, "and I've got my eyes set on that one!"

The chubby young woman squinted to see the indicated man, and promptly went slack-jawed.

"Huh! That crazy physicist's son?"

"He's the one! The lucky man I'm going to make mine."

Ignoring the yearning looks from male students, professors and staff alike, Hathon walked determinedly towards the out-of-the-way patch of grass where her target, Daniel, had sat down. He was the shy, understated son of a crazy scientist who everyone thought belonged in the nuthouse. She was going to offer him the greatest honor of all—that of being her man. With a small smile that sent the younger male population hyperventilating, she thought how grateful young Daniel would be for her unexpected grace. He would adore her, worship the ground she walked on, see her as the all-beautiful goddess that she really was.

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"Hello Daniel."

She looked down on him from her catwalk-worthy height, crossing her arms in a slow, languid movement and giving him a feline smile.

"Hello, Hathon. Er…" he grimaced, trying to sound polite. "Can you move a bit to the right, please?"

She grinned. Of course, he wanted a better view, and with a regal movement she was about to gracefully grant his request...

"You're blocking the sun. The writing on these pages is a bit worn out, I need a lot of light, you understand…"

She pursed her lips with obvious dissatisfaction. With a quick gesture, she snapped one of the articles from his hand, carelessly detaching it from the rest of the collection.

"Careful!" Daniel protested. "That's a priceless—"

"How can you read this," she interrupted, "why does a young, attractive man like you bury his head in this pile of worthless hogwash, when there's so many things out there far more worthy?" She slowly kneeled next to him on the grass, leaning towards him and lowering her voice to a throaty purr. "Like me…"

He uncomfortably cleared his throat, standing up just as she was about to prop her elbow on his shoulder and inadvertently causing her to fall flat on the grass. Seething, she pushed herself up, then quickly recomposed her innocent expression, invitingly batting her eyelashes at him.

"Erm, yeah…" Daniel quickly gathered his scattered articles. "Well, it was nice seeing you, I'll, uhm, see you around, then."

She placed a hand on his arm, caressing it slowly.

"Stay…" she murmured in his ear.

Blushing furiously, he took a few quick steps backwards.

"I would, ahem, love to, but I, erm, have to help at the lab today! So—"

"What, another one of your mother's crazy projects?" Hathon rolled her eyes with obvious disdain. "It's a surprise they still allow her to use the laboratory and other government facilities!"

"My mother's project is not crazy," he retorted angrily. "And it would have been ready a long time ago if they hadn't cut down her funding—" He cut himself short, realizing he really did not want to be in any kind of conversation with the arrogant woman. "Anywho…I'll be on my way, then."

With a quick wave, he turned on his heels and hurried away, hoping she would not pursue, as she was sometimes prone to do. He could not recall how many times Hathon had cornered him, sometimes in public, at the library (how they let her in was beyond him, as she was in no way affiliated with the university!) or in his favorite coffee shop, or even on his way home a couple of times. With her flashy outfits and her heavy make-up that made her look as though she had just descended from the catwalk (and forgotten to get dressed!), she embarrassed him to no end, and honestly scared him just a little bit. And when she opened her mouth, everything that came out was either self-flattery, disparagement towards his field of study and his theories, or some airheaded remark that conveyed her superficial views on life. Mostly the former, though, and Daniel was sick of hearing how the world would think so much better of him if he went out with her.

"Mister Hathon," he snorted derisively, "yeah, like that'll happen."

All comments are welcome! This is the first time I am writing something like this, and as far as story ideas go, I know--this plot bunny took quite a hop off the regular track. So, thanks for taking the time to read it, and know that I value your feedback!

Cheers!

SC