Disclaimer : Not Mine

Warning : Bad Grammar, Un-beta-ed, English not my native


Many purebloods believe that they manage to deceive the muggle about their existence. They blend with them and cast powerful magic at the entrance of their world. They so proud and always boasting about their so call achievement to their younger generation to come.

But..

Unfortunately, the British Government knows their existence long ago, before the rise of The Empire. Everything about Wizarding World and been record in detail and keep in somewhere safe. However, the British Government content to let Wizarding World alone.

Until...

The World War II happens. The British Government had begun their counter attack when the rumors start to come in.

Hitler had a powerful supporter.

A wizard by the name Gellert Grindelwald

A very powerful supporter with powerful follower.

A wizard and his henchmen...

While the soldiers receive the news with calmly, the higher up almost sent into panic mode. After been scold by a man name Mycroft Holmes (the second) for getting into panic needlessly, the man simply suggest to approach any muggleborn who live in that community to joint them. It took a while but finally the higher up agree.

The suggestion was easy said than been done. But once again, Mycorft Holmes step in. Waxing about honor, duty and patriotic, the man manage to make muggleborn witches and wizards agree to join the war.

It takes years before the group truly complete. A mixed group of wizards, witches and muggle, the branch of counter intelligent with gadget that beyond their time. Their first mission succeeds with 100% and zero casualties. From then on, this little misfit of group never looks back. They keep taking highly and dangerous mission and come back with a triumph. It added to their credential, when Mycroft Holmes comes to them bearing a letter from the Queen.

A license to kill...

They name themselves the Kingsman.

Their field agents were given numbering code.

The most efficient agent was given a lucky number...

007... James Bond,

And their legend grew,

Meanwhile, Myrcoft Holmes (soon be known as M) sit behind the desk somewhere in the building smile smugly at his success.

Well...

The point is, the muggle know about Wizarding World existence. In fact, after the WWII they began oversee the Wizarding World closely. To make sure that no Dark Lord ever rise again. But they're only human. They bound to make a mistake. They somehow miss the rise of Voldermort. They can only watch helplessly the Wizarding World turn into chaos. After the fall of Voldemort, they began sending undercover agent into Wizarding World, muggleborn wizard that is. There's one time where one of their agents covers almost blown up because the agent was reading Stephens Hawking book in the pub full of wizards.

But... our stories aren't s about them.

This is the real stories...


They call it the Years That Never Was.

It began when the news about Voldemort resurrection spreading in Wizarding World. It's began when Ministry of Magic refuse to acknowledge the news and start questioning Albus Dumbledore and Harry Potter credibility. Knowing it going to get worse, the Kingsman silently interfere. They offer the protection to any muggleborn family who accept it. At first, they hesitate but after the break ins at Ministry of Magic, the truth of Sirius Black, many accept the offer. It only increases with the death of Albus Dumbledore. Almost all of them had been hidden in Britain, America or Europe with magic runes to hide their magic. While in hiding, most children had been giving the muggle education and muggle entertainment. That's where they discover the whole new world.

The Internet...

Welcome to the world of Fandom...


Now... Years after the Battle of Hogwarts

Unspeakable Department

Unspeakable Fey was one of many witches who join the Kingsman offer. She like any other did join the Battle of Hogwarts and for that, she had received a recommendation from Headmistress McGonagall and Minister Shacklebolt. However her dream to join the Q Department of the Kingsman had been turn down. So she turns to Unspeakable. While she not the genius like Hermione Granger, she was brilliant in magical runes.

Now, she sullenly pokes the item in front of her before huff desperately. The Cube (definitely not AllSpark or Tessaract whatdidyoutalkingabout) her creation did not give any reaction. Again, disappoint with The Cube, Unspeakable Fey get up from her chair to get a drink.

Unspeakable Fey always a dreamer. After a war, she always dreams about adventure in blue box, or fighting an evil force in spandex or mini sailor suit and many more. Then she remembers. She a witch, instead dream of them, why not join them. That's when she tries to apply into the Q Department and later the Unspeakable Department. The moment they accept her, she quickly submerge herself into her project. Lucky for her, the head department allows the side project as long it didn't interfere with the main one. Everything went smoothly until four month ago; she got a visit from her longtime friend No4. Her certificate insane friend who work at dragon reserve.

At first, everything was normal until No4 give her a Cheshire cat smile. No4 whipped out her leather bound book and give it to her under the threat of death. She opens the book and feels her jaw drop. Inside, neatly arrange was pictures of Thorin Oakenshield and Bilbo Baggins in inappropriate (or thing they always dream) position. She could feel the blood rush to her head and some trickled down her nose. No4 cackle madly before taking back the book. After an hour of questioning and prodding, No4 finally answer.

And no, she not sulks.

Fine a little bit of sulking, and curse in various language.

She was within her right for sulking. She had been working this project for years and out of nowhere, her friend manages to break first. By accident. By accident that cause by her and her friend being drunk to their ass.

So yes, she had a right to sulk, curse, jealous and angry. When she ask about the runes, ironically No4 had told her, Bill Weasley had guard the runes like dragon protect its gold.

The sound of kettle gets Unspeakable Fey out of her memory. She quickly prepares the tea and walk to her small office. She accidentally stumbles over her book collection on the floor, causing her tea to splash on the Cube. Before she can do anything, the Cube glows and vibrating excitedly and with a flash, it gone.

"Huh... figures, it needs a dash of tea," murmur Unspeakable Fey. The Cube returns an hour later with a very familiar red and gold gauntlet. Unspeakable Fey reverently hold the gauntlet, inspect it and confirm, yes it a real deal and let out a joyful laugh that quickly turn onto creepy laugh. A few Unspeakable that walk outside her office stop and look at her door before shrug and continue their work. Well, they are bunch of weird people anyway.


Meanwhile, in the Chief of Unspeakable office.

The Chief heard the laugh and sigh in despair. Sometimes, he wondered why he accepted this position. The pay great but it's not worth with all the trouble it come with it. He need a vacation. A long one from this asylum. He bangs his head softly when another laugh rang through the hallway.


Seven month later, Auror Department, Head Chief Office.

Auror Head Chief Harry Potter had a pleasant morning. He already finishes all the paperwork's; no complain letter from Minerva (about Teddy) and the Auror training had ran smoothly.

If that wasn't a sign of trouble to come, Harry doesn't know what it is. Before he could muse any further, the door open and Ron walk in with frown on his face. Harry sigh, there's go his morning.

"Trouble Ron?," he watch as Ron flops down on the chair.

"Not yet. Finish your paperwork?,"

"Yeah... you?,"

"Me too, pleasant morning, isn't it?,"

"Yess...,"

"...,"

"...,"

"I'm going to blame you if I'm late for dinner with Herm," Ron said deadpan. Harry only snort.

"And I going to blame you," Harry lean back to his chair, mindlessly taping his fingers on table. Ron did the same and put his legs on the table. Both of them simply wait for whatever going to happen to them today. Fifteen minute later, they can hear a commotion outside the door. Harry stop tapping and making himself look presentable. Ron also did the same.

The door bang opens dramatically and the Unspeakable Chief enters with desperate air.

"Potter, Weasley... I need help,"

"No," chorus both of them. The Chief look at them flabbergasted.

"But.. but, I haven't said anything yet,"

"We know," again both of them said the same time.

"But the last time we help you...,"

"Bill and Charlie end up in different reality...,"

"And come back home with a psychopath dragon...,"

"So the answer is no," end both of them.

"Would you stop doing that, this is serious matter," growled the Chief. He pulls out the file from his cloak and hand it to Ron. Ron cast a Gemini spell and gives Harry the copy. Both of them spend few minute reading the content.

"So... there nothing wrong here," said Harry after reading. Ron nod absently agree with Harry.

"Yes and the unicorn fart the rainbow... Nothing wrong my arse," grumble the Chief.

"What OTP means anyway?," ask Ron curiously.

"Hell if I know... dammit Potter, Weasley... call it a hunch. Gut feeling, there something wrong with that gathering...," Harry and Ron look each other and look at the Chief.

"You're hiding something. If this is a simple gathering, you could break it up by yourself," both of them look at the Chief, who simply resign and sit.

"Seven month ago, Unspeakable Fey, had manage to create an item that enable her to travel between reality," the Chief pause in his explanation.

"Again?!," Ron exclaim. Harry eye twitch and the Chief look at both of them sheepishly.

"Chief...last time it happen, we been hound by a crazy man in blue box that promise to send hellfire on us. Please tell me, this Unspeakable Fey didn't do anything or take anything from any reality she or he go. Because I will tell you now, if they come visit us, you're the first person I'm going to throw into the fire. Figuratively and metaphor," Harry said while smile calmly and Ron smirk. The Chief gulp, he quickly trying to explain to both of them to ensure the safety of his life.

"N... no, she did not take anything. This is what troubles me most. I check her myself every time she comes back. But the only thing on her body was a camera. A muggle one, that's all," the Chief can't help but wince at his stammering voice.

"Then, there's nothing wrong with the gathering. But...," Harry make a stop gesture at the Chief "I will conduct the investigation on my free time. Let's hope it's nothing then," the Chief took that as dismiss and rose from his chair and walk toward door.

"Have you ever tried to stop her by yourself?," ask Ron suddenly. The Chief tighten his grip at door handle. Eyes wide he turns at them, Harry and Ron look at him with surprise.

"Y... yes, I... I ... I did try o... once. B... but... Merlin, I never know those muggleborn could be that scary. ExcusemeIhavetogo,needtodrinksomethinghard, Oh MERLIN!," the Chief slams the door and run out as fast as he could. Both Harry and Ron look each other and snort.

"Definitely a fangirls," mutter Harry. Ron shudders, the memory of dealing with the fangirls come into their minds. Harry fingers twitch while Ron mutters something about creepy fangirls and fanboys.

"Are you going to investigate it?,"

"Later, very much later, judging by Chief reaction. You coming,"

"Buy me a case of firewhiskey and I bring Hermione with us,"

"Oh... good, somehow I got a feeling we need her help anyway,"

"We always need her help,"

"Yeah...,"


Unfortunately for them, later means two day later as Harry when coming back from lunch earlier than usual, stumble across a stash on desk of one of his minions. Curious, since the stash was bound in leather with the same runes of the Cube, he takes a peek. Quickly he slams the bound close and pick it up. His face turn red, green and pale before turn and bark an order at some newbie Auror to tell the Auror Fisher to get his ass to his office yesterday. He turn into his office and sit at his chair taking a few minute to calm himself. The he proceed to glare at the leather bound book. He gnashes his teeth and forces his hand to open the book.

It's collection of picture.

Picture of him and Malfoy,

Picture of him and Ron,

Picture of him and Snape,

Picture of him and Sirius,

Remus,

Various unknown people.

In bedroom, classroom, office and many other place doing...

...

...

..

No! He refuses to think about it. Quickly he slams it close and refrain himself from burning it. He summons a few choice of alcoholic drink and mutters how he need it more than that. Thirty minute later, more sober than opposite, the door knock.

"Come in," said Harry. Auror Fisher comes in. Harry take a look at him, Auror Fisher face paler than usual, his hand is trembling much to Harry satisfaction. Harry float the book (he refuse to touch it) and Auror Fisher look almost ready to pass out.

"What. The. Meaning. Of. This. Auror?, " growls Harry. Auror Fisher try to silent, Harry look at him and smile calmly. But to Auror Fisher, it look more terrifying than calm. He try to hold his stand when his boss speak, "You got five minute to explain yourself, or else...," the temperature of the office had turn into frigid cool. Auror Fisher abandons all his restrain.

He sings faster than a canary.

Auror Fisher comes out after been dismiss and the first thing he do is asking a long temporary leave, go home and hides under the blanket. Fuck those who said their leader is soft and gentle. That man in that office is more like demon than angel.


Harry scowl at his wife and sister in laws. Instead of sympathy for him, they're enjoying the pictures.

Perverts ... All of them. Ron patted his shoulder in as a support. He face still pale and he hold a bottle of firewhiskey. .He beckon him join and he nod and walk away from the woman. But not before take a look at them. His eyes meet his wife and there's a gleam in her eyes, she smirk at him slyly.

Well...at least there is something good coming out from this.


They raid the gathering three days later. It was a cafe shop somewhere in London. It belongs to one of the muggleborn witch family. Harry look at Ron and Hermione before enter the cafe. He checks the surrounding and notice almost all of them were muggleborn witches and wizard. He spot Unspeakable Fey and walk toward her with Ron and Hermione follow from behind.

"Miss Rowland," said Harry, Unspeakable Fey turn and let out a gasp. The witch and wizard all look at them and promptly silent. Some of them try to get away, but Ron simply voice his displeasure if he had to chase them making them slink back into their seats like guilty student.

"A... Auror Potter, Auror Weasley, Mrs Weasley... err... what a surprise. Did you come to join our little club?," Unspeakable Fey or Miss Rowland stuttered.

"No, I've come here to confiscate the Cube," Miss Rowland eyes widened. Murmurs broke out among the gatherer. Until a voice speak loud enough.

"But, what about my Destiel collection?!," Harry and Ron can see some of them nodded their head.

"Yeah! My FrostIron!,"

"My Johnlock!,"

"My Waifu!,"

"Cherik!,"

"Thorki!,"

"Bagginshield!,"

"DoctorRose!"

"You know, I don't known either to be horrified or amuse that I know all of that and I blame you, Hermione. And Ginny," Harry whisper to Hermione and Ron. Both of them only laugh at him. Bastard.

"SNARRY! DARRY!," okay that's it.

"Sonorus, ENOUGH! SILENT!," the windows panes rattle and Ron wince at Harry voice. Harry takes a deep breath at look at the audience. He gives them smile that send shiver down to their spine and speak "Good, now some of you may remember the last incident to involve this kind of thing. I will let Mrs Weasley explain the consequences of ripping the reality. In the meantime, Miss Rowland," this time all of them feel the goose bump and the temperature drop slightly "Give me the Cube," or else echo clearly in everyone mind. Miss Rowland quickly run and retrieve the Cube and hand it over to Auror Potter. He simply nods and walks toward the exit and never look back. Miss Rowland release sighs in relief.

"Now, now Miss Rowland, it's not over yet," said Ron. Miss Rowland jump back and look at him. This time some of the audience broke down and crying from the killing pressure Auror Weasley had release.

"What... what do you mean, Auror Weasley?,"

"For misuse of magic, there will be a mark in your record. Since there nothing that hunt us or you, we will let it go with warning, same with the rest of you lot. Understoond? If I caught one of you in act, pray that you will be dead before Auror Potter descent over you like a Master of Death himself," Auror Weasley said to Miss Rowland, who nodded her head frantically. Some of the audience promptly faint hearing the word. Ron smirks and turns to his wife. "Good. Hermione?,"

"I take it from here. Go after him," Hermione shooed him before turn to the still stunned audience. She take out her wand and revives the unconscious on before continue "Now ladies and gentlemen, let me tell explain how jumping into other reality is bad...,"

Ron found Harry at the sitting on the sidewalk, trying to calm himself. Silently he sits beside him and wait.

"Well... At least they didn't making riot this time," Ron snort.

"They too shock to do anything else,"

"Point taken,"

"Better...?,"

"No, I need drinks. Lots of lots of drink,"

"Let's hit Aberforth bar, we can nag him until he give us his best drink,"

"It's okay to leave Hermione there alone?,"

"Nah... She's fine. In fact I think she will enjoy it,"

"Oh good... hey Ron?,"

"Hmmm?,"

"Should we tell Neville about his picture?,"

"The one with the plants?,"

"Yes... it's there more than...,"

"Yeah... you didn't see the rest of the book... there's one with...,"

"Ron, please,"

"Sure why not. At least we have another drinking partner,"


Thing become calm after that. Harry keep the Cube even when the Chief try to get it back. He keeps it inside wooden chest with strong enchantment and deep into Potter vault. The three of them draft a new law regarding jumping into another reality much to Shacklebolt amusement. And hunting all related photo about him. The audience that gather at the cafe shop was traumatize with Harry and Ron antics that day and had been seeing the therapist to heal themselves. The Healers say it will take at least a year for them to recover. Yes, finally their life had become normal as they can be.

But Fate is such a cruel Mistress (or she just bloody boring!)

Three months, two week, four days, five hours, thirty minutes and forty second later...

Draco Malfoy gets into Harry office and throws books at his table. He rants and screams for a while and Harry slowly opens the books with dread. It was an erotic novels and cartoons about them. And pregnancy in male form. He. With. Malfoy. Pregnant. Male.

Harry screams shatter the whole department windows and few other departments around them.

On that day, the Wizarding World saw something far scarier after the fall of Voldemort. Their savior on the warpath and nothing can stop him.

Oh wait...

"Pass the popcorn George,"

"Here you go dear brother,"

"Are we late?,"

"Nope just at the right time," a terrified shriek can be hear from distance following an anger voice.

"Ooooo... looks like Neville join the rampage," another scream can be heard at Florean Ice Cream Shop.

"Poor, poor bastard...,"

"Hey Ron, are you sure this is fine?,"

"Yeah, I already warn them. It's their own fault anyway, pass the butterbeer Percy,"

"I never knew Harry had a temper," the Weasley man's snort.

"Consider yourself lucky Perc, for never saw it firsthand,"

"My ears still ringing two day after his tantrum,"

"Me too,"

"It's that firewhiskey?,

"Hey, Kingsley, welcome to the club, want one,"

"Yes please," chuckle can be heard among the gathering.

"Skipping the job aren't we?,"

"Any sane person should, really must they overeact much?,"

"Have you see it yet?,"

"See what?," a shudders run into all of them.

"You lucky bastard, hey Ron give it to him," Ron pulls out the album from his pocket and throw it to Kingsley.

Five minute later

At the sound of Kingsley throw up, a number of galleon change hands.

"Overreact much?,"

"Shut up Bill, give me that damn firewhiskey,"

"Scotch?,"

"That too..,"

"Sooo... who are going to stop them?,"

"Stop who?,"

"That's what I thought,"

Nevermind, they seem enjoying the scene rather than helping to stop them.

"HARRY JAMES POTTER!,"

"DRACO LUCIOUS MALFOY!,"

"NEVILLE ARTHUR LONGBOTTOM!,"

"WHAT IN MERLIN NAME YOU IDIOT ARE DOING!,"

Well, except their wifes.


My own headcannon :

After they overcome their self esteem issue, these people accidentally end up with a little quirk of their own.

Harry : When he really angry, his smile enough to make the criminal confess. The worse thing is, he didn't even realize it.

Ron : Become a little bit dramatic. Something he truly enjoy it and watch other people squirm under Harry smile.


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