Flashes. Flashes were everywhere as people took pictures of the couple. It was Miyavi and Kai's anniversary and their friends had decided to hold a party for them. Kai held on to Miyavi's arm, both of them smiling and posing for the camera. Everyone was dressed for the occasion, the couple themselves wearing suits. Typically they didn't go for this kind of thing, but Kai had thought it would be fun to dress up a bit. And Miyavi had been more than happy to oblige. Anything to make his itoshii hito happy. After all, this was one of the last nights he had with him before his four month tour started. And as always he was determined to spend as much time with his family as possible.

Kai on the other hand, was not feeling so determined. As he planted a kiss on his grinning husbands cheek, he thought about how he wanted nothing more than to get away, to go hide in his room. Away from his friends and fans. Away from Miyavi. It wasn't that anyone had said or done anything, Kai just wasn't in the mood the mood to deal with anyone.

He'd been feeling so depressed lately. The fun and excitement of being in a band and being married to the famous and sexy Miyavi that he had felt just months ago was no where to be found.

Kai felt tears building up in his eyes, and he willed them to go away. He was not going to cry in front of all these people. Not when they're all having such a good time. Miyavi glanced over at him, and he could immediately tell something was wrong. His smile disappeared.

He had caught the drummer a few times crying when he thought no one was around. He begged and pleaded for him to tell him what was wrong. But each time Kai refused. And not because he didn't want to tell him, but because he truthfully had no idea what was causing it.

Miyavi lead him away from the crowd and over to the corner.

"What's the matter?" he asked softly, a worried expression on his face. Kai looked down. He hated making his husband worry. Especially before a tour.

"What do you mean?" he asked back, trying to play dumb. "Nothing's wrong."

"Please don't lie to me…you're crying again. Obviously something's bothering you."

"I'm not crying. They're just watering because of allergies. It's nothing." He faked a smile.

"Was it something I did?"

He sighed. This was why he didn't ever talk to Miyavi when something was bothering him. The man automatically assumed it was his fault and beat himself up over it. Kai hated that.

Putting his hands on both sides of his face, and looking into his eyes he insisted, "There. Is. Nothing. Wrong. Now come on, people are looking for us. Lets get back to the party."

"Okay," said Miyavi, still not believing him. Kai planted a quick kiss on his lips and led them back to their party.

XxxxXxxxXxxxXxxx

Hours later an exhausted Kai went to check on Aiko. He walked towards the crib quietly, careful not to wake her up. He looked down at his sleeping angel, but did not smile. That was one of the first things that made Kai think something was wrong. Aiko never failed to make him smile, to make him happy as soon as he laid eyes on her. It had been that way ever since they day he and Miyavi adopted her. But lately, there had been nothing. No emotion what so ever towards the baby. He found himself sometimes not wanting to even take care of her. It broke his heart. Sighing, he pulled Aiko's blanket up a little more.

Then he felt a pair of arms wrap around his waist. "Have I told you, you look amazing," Miyavi whispered in his ear. Kai chuckled.

"Only a thousand times," he whispered back, as he felt his hand slowly slide up his shirt.

"Not nearly enough," he replied as he scooped him up into his arms. Kai giggled as he was carried to their bedroom.

Not even bothering to close the door behind them, Miyavi plopped Kai down on the bed. Kai grinned and grabbed Miyavi's tie, yanking him closer.

"Kimi ga hoshii yo."

Miyavi chuckled lightly and kissed him, his hands already getting rid of Kai's clothes. "as if that's not obvious."