2P Italy (I Was Captured by A Lazy Pervert)

And so, after a miscalculation, the bloodthirsty Italy was captured by Germany. However…

'I…I can't believe this guy.'

Italy sat, eyebrows twitching as his captor continued to snore away on a couch opposite of him. A plate of pasta steamed in front of him, and a glass of wine stood next to it. Sampling it, he noted that it wasn't half-ba—

"GAH! No, no, no! What am I doing?! I'm not supposed to accept an enemy's hospitality, in fact, what's with this lax atmosphere?!" the tan man screamed, pointing an indignant finger at the slowly waking German man.

Letting out a yawn, he asked, "What's the matter now? The pasta's not good enough for 'ya? I just made it 'coz, you know, you're Italian, and Italians like pasta, right?"

Italy sputtered, "Pasta-Wha-THAT'S NOT IT, YOU IDIOT!"

Germany blinked slowly. And snapped a finger.

"The couch is not comfortable enough then? That's weird, I just washed the covers a year ago…or was it two?"

Italy's eyes widened in horror, and he immediately stood up in disgust.

"Ugh! You know what? I can't stand this anymore! I'm escaping!" Shouting angrily at the man, Italy stomped to the door. Germany waved lazily as he flopped back down, "Tschüss…"

Stopping in his tracks at the carefree farewell, Italy's shoulders started to shake in fury. In front of the open door, he turned back and yelled, "What the fuck is with that laidback attitude?! Don't you want to stop your prisoner from escaping?"

Letting out a sigh as his nap was interrupted yet again, Germany answered, "Why would I? Keeping you prisoner is just too much of a hassle, and stopping you from escaping is too much work… Close the door on your way out, though."

"No!" the Italian cut off as he started to rant, "In the times of war, if you call yourself a soldier, you must put your best efforts to imprison your prisoner, and in no way must you treat them like you would a guest! Hey! Are you listening?! Get off your lazy ass and stop me from escaping! Hey, are you listening?! Stop sleeping! Put yourself in my shoes, dammit! I refuse to acknowledge that I escaped from being a prisoner of someone who doesn't even know howto keep someone imprisoned!"

Inching a foot outside the door, Italy mocked, "See, look here! The front door is open! Don't you want to stop me? Come on~"

Germany paused, lifted his head up, and narrowed his eyes, finally looking serious. Italy huffed smugly as the man stood up, walked towards him…

…and continued his way outside?

Gaping, he watched, dumbfounded, as the blonde approached two women passing by the house and with a charming smile, started flirting with them. After getting an agreement for a date with the blushing and giggling women, he walked back inside and dropped onto the couch again.

Italy could feel his pride withering away as he stood still in front of the door. A loud snore echoed throughout the room, and he silently walked back inside, holding his aching head.

"He's an idiot," the red-eyed man groaned.

I know, you guys must want to kill me for not updating my other stories first, but I have to get used to writing again after months of not writing anything. Work is killing me, and these random ideas have to get out. I also want to write something non-continuous for once...